Courage for Hope
Tara had been eyeing Willow for a while. She hadn’t gathered up the courage to ask her out.
Tara sighed inwardly to herself.
I never have the courage for anything..
She’d seen Willow laughing and happy. Which was good.
But Tara dwelled on the insecurities within herself and wished that Willow could be hers.
She knew of spells that could do what she wanted, but, to Tara, that wouldn’t be love. That would be torture.
And Tara wasn’t the torturing type. She was just the sweet, silent lover, that hoped and prayed that she wouldn’t be alone.
She asked the Goddess time and time again for the strength to do what she wished of her own will, but she was given the same answer.
“You have to find your own two feet, child. Your heart knows what it wants, ask it for strength and find it within yourself. This time, I cannot help you.”
Maybe Willow and I are too different, Tara thought to herself sometimes.
Or maybe it’s just me…
Night after night she cried herself to sleep, pitying her own introvertedness. She felt that she couldn’t succeed at anything…
She finally gave in and cast a spell to make Willow ask her. She knew that this wasn’t like herself at all.
And she wasn’t surprised when the spell didn’t work.
“Excuse me..” Willow asked her one day, startling her. “Do you have a pen? I kinda,” Willow blushed, “I forgot mine.” She shrugged, “and you seem really nice so…” she tilted her head to the side and smiled.
Tara handed her the pen and their fingers touched. She was suddenly given this burst of energy and sense-of-self that she’d never gotten before.
“U-um..” she started, swallowing hard. “Do you think we could get some coffee sometime? And maybe we can talk and get to know eachother..”
Willow saw where this was going. She thought to herself, ‘Wow..how long has she felt like this? Tara’s always one to think things out..’
But she was almost heartbroken to tell Tara the news. “I’m…I’m real sorry..I’m with Xander..” she jerked her head in his direction and she hesitated. “If you’d’ve only said something a week ago…”
Willow shook her head and said “Thanks for the pen..I’ll give it to you after class…”
Tara resisted deeply the urge to cry. She felt horrible..disgusted.
“Class! May I have your attention please?” gave the response from the teacher. For the first time in her life, Tara almost audibly thought and said, “No.”
“We have a new student. Her name is Winifred Burkle. Winifred, please take a seat.”
‘Fred’ Burkle saw an empty seat next to a poor and dispondant girl.
‘Aww..poor thing..she needs a pick-me-up. Guess I’ll go say hi.’
She sat herself in the desk and glanced over at Tara. She had the words “Hi, I’m a Lesbian!” written in rainbow colors on her shirt.
“Hiya..m’name is Fred.” She leaned a little closer. “What’s yours?”
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