Disclaimer- sadly none of the characters are mine, neither is the song. They belong to Michelle Branch, Joss and the Wb etc. Just don’t sue me please!
Spoilers- come on guys you should know this! S6 of Buffy. She’s been alive lets say...3 weeks?
Distribution- if ya want it, by all means, take it! Just lemme know where it’s at! Thankies
Feedback- I will love you forever!
Author's notes- this is my attempt to have less dialogue and more actual writing, so of course I ended up with tons of smoochies. Also a big thanks to everyone who replied to my plea for help, especially, POWillow. Without you I never would have finished this story. And if I don’t shut up soon, no ones gonna read it! So here it is...
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Buffy stepped out of the car into the cool California air. This was the spot they had agreed to meet. An old gazebo in one of the smaller cemeteries just south of Sunnydale. They had been here before. When they had wanted to get away from the scoobies, the monsters, everything. When it had been just the two of them. This place still held memories of those times.
He could sense her before he could see her. Angel had always wondered why he could feel her presence so strongly. Was it because she was the slayer? Or was it the fact that her blood ran in his veins? Or was it something else? When this sense began was a mystery to him. It seemed like he had always been drawn to her. A helpless moth pulled to her flame. If I was blind I would see you. Great Angel, he thought, go all stalker boy now.
"You’re cold." Angel slipped his coat over her bare shoulders as a way of greeting.
"I have been for three weeks." She replied emotionlessly, though both could feel the others excitement from being together.
Angel understood. Willow had explained that she had pulled Buffy back from the dead to free her from hell. Angel knew better. She didn’t have to say anything, but he knew she had been dragged from heaven.
"I’m sorry" words didn’t fit what he was feeling.
"Could we not?" she asked peering deeply into his eyes, needing to be closer. "Could we..." she trailed off.
It surprised her when she realized she was kissing him. It was slow, desperate. Every second begging for the next to be spent the same way. He returned it instinctively. Offering the safety and comfort she need so badly. Then a sliver of sanity slipped into his mind and he pulled back as though he had been electrocuted.
"Buffy we cant"
She was still breathing heavily. He loved that simple motion, the rise and fall of her chest. He loved being the one to speed it up.
"Why not!"
Why not? A thousand reasons came to mind, and ten thousand more contradicted him. Because I love you. Because you love me. Because I’ll tear you apart.
"You know why. I’m a vampire. He stated bluntly. "I’d put you at risk everyday." And I can’t do that to you. We can’t even… make love? Have sex? Consummate their relationship??? It all fell short of what they would do.
" I don’t care about those things!" but even as the words spilled from her lips he could see her face fall, and the sadness in her eyes.
"And what about Riley?"
Buffy burst "Riley left! I loved him and he left me all alone!" She laughed a hollow laugh. "Starting to be a pattern isn’t it?"
"I-"
Angel didn’t know what to say. A million thoughts and emotions fogged his mind. She loved him. Past tense? He left? Riley was gone? Did that mean they could…? No he couldn’t let himself think that way. He was still a vampire; he couldn’t give her a normal life or a child, heck they couldn’t even sit next to one another without losing control. God he wanted to touch her, to kiss the tremble away from those soft lips he knew so well. No! Bad Angel! He thought, trying to uh calm himself.
Buffy was pissed She had come back from the dead and made the one hour drive to a graveyard in traffic to watch him stutter and brood? *I shoulda stayed in heaven. * She rolled her eyes. But a part of her giggled that watching him stutter and brood was heaven. She silenced it quickly.
Angrily she rose from the wooden bench they had been seated on, Soon after, he followed.
"You can’t even finish a sentence! Why did I even come here?" She spun around to face him and found herself pressed close against Angel, very close.
His voice automatically became husky and deep as he reacted to her nearness. "I’ll show you why."
He grabbed her tightly and captured her lips in his. His movements were filled with passion and desire. Their tongues dueled, both fighting for more. Buffy moaned in his mouth as his features changed into that of a vampire. Without thinking, he bit down on her lower lip, a thrill surging through him. This time it was Buffy that pulled away.
"What the Hell!" she yelled at him
He couldn’t have been more embarrassed. But it only proved his point. If they were together, sooner or later one of them would lose control.
"I didn’t want-"
She cut him off "the day you figure out what you do want there’ll be a parade"
_~_~_~_~_~
That night Buffy rode home alone. Things hadn’t gone the way that she wanted them to, she knew Angel would agree with her there. But dammit she didn’t know how to say it so he understood. And until he changed his stubborn mind (and if he was the same man she knew that would be awhile) she would have to settle for being with someone else. But it would always be him she wanted by her side.
*I want you but I’m not giving in this time
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything that I knew*
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