Summary: This is the Buffy gang in a chat room.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Buffy. It belongs to the guy we know is on drugs, Joss Weed-Crazy. There are a couple more characters, shows, and networks, etc. that belong to whoever the hell owns them.
Parental Guidance: Rating: PG. Usual stuff, slight language and dialogue.
Time Line: That ever so nervous gap between the 2nd and 3rd season.
Note: (This is starting to get annoying, huh?) Now, I don’t know if there is computers in hell, but I’m sure you guys know what I say about hell is true or not. If that offenses you religion-wise, don’t read this story.
WARNING: (HEY I LIKE WRITING IN CAP.S!) THIS STORY WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH AND IF YOU HAVE HEART OR LUNG PROBLEMS...... Sorry, but I just mugged the guy who was making the before-you-read notes. Now, finally:
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Online host:
Online host:*** You are in "The Teens Club".***
Online host:
Slayergirl390: Oh, this is nice. Uh, hi? I’m Buffy. Hello? Niiice.
Slayergirl390: Hello?
Slayergirl390: I like frills.
Slayergirl390: Yep. I’m a lezzy too.
Slayergirl390: Hello?
Slayergirl390: I’M A HO!
Slayergirl390: I’M LEAVING NOW.
Online host: Hornyguy has entered the room.
Hornyguy: Really Buff, gee I never knew.
Online host: GeekGirl7934 has entered the room.
GeekGirl7934: Where are you?
Hornyguy: Why weren’t you at school?
Slayergirl390: I’m not telling.
Hornyguy: Why not?
Slayergirl390: ‘Cause.
Online host: Hogirl has entered the room.
Hogirl: Hi! What are you guys talking about?
Hornyguy: Hi! If you just tuned in, everyone’s a confused person. And we has no idea how Buffy has suddenly reappeared.
Hogirl: Oh.
Hornyguy: Well Buff, spill it.
Online host: Deadboy2 has entered the room.
Deadboy2: Buffy?
Slayergirl390: Angel?
Hornyguy: All right, I want an explanation, now!
GeekGirl7934: Uh, have any of you guys considered this is not a private room and someone could come in any minute?
Slayergirl390: You’re right. I wonder why an outsider hasn’t come in yet.
Hogirl: Cause it’s midnight?
GeekGirl7934: Then why are we here?
Hogirl: We’re insomniacs. It’s not likely anyone else is gonna enter.
Online host: GeekGuy879 has entered the room.
GeekGuy879: I’m Jonathan. What is all this about?
GeekGirl7934: A play. We’re talking about a play.
GeekGuy879: OK. What were you guys talking about before that?
Hornyguy: What is better: Cheek and Chong movies or Monty Python movies. I vote Cheek.
Hogirl: Monty.
GeekGirl7934: I agree
Slayergirl390: I so agree.
GeekGuy879: Yeah. I think I hear my mom calling me.
Online host: GeekGuy879 has left the room.
GeekGirl7934: Close call, huh?
Hornyguy: How could you guys think Monty is better?
Hogirl: We’re off that.
Hornyguy: No, it is not over.
Slayergirl390: Yes, it is.
Hornyguy: Monty is drawn-out British humor.
Hogirl: Did you say Cheek and Chong?
Hornyguy: Yes.
Hogirl: I’ve seen them. They’re Mexican hippies!
Hornyguy: And how would you know that?
Hogirl: I stumbled upon it.
Hornyguy: On what channel?
GeekGirl7934: Maybe Comedy Central.
Slayergirl390: Maybe not, but why would she know that?
Hornyguy: Maybe she likes something other then Melrose Place and Beverly Hills 90210.
Slayergirl390: They’re certainly your fave shows.
Hogirl: Okay, I was in Comedy Central cause I like South Park. And Viva Variety, and The Tonight Show, and Make me Laugh, and watching Jeff Foxworthy, and Paula Poundstone, and Margaret Chow.
Hornyguy: So we found her special weakness.
GeekGirl7934: Let’s get back on topic.
Hornyguy: I forgot what it was.
GeekGirl7934: Buffy, Angel, suddenly appeared.
Hornyguy: Oh. Well Buff, spill it.
Deadboy2: Did everyone forget about me?
Hornyguy: Shut up, Dead Boy.
Deadboy2: At least you called me by my screen name.
GeekGirl7934: Why did you chose that as your screen name. And further more, why are there two?
Deadboy2: Some sick pun by the big guy.
GeekGirl7934: God?
Deadboy2: Go down.
Hornyguy: I always imagined, or more or less, fantasized, about you in hell. But how did you get there?
Slayergirl390: OK! Just shut up. Angel pulled the sword out of Alfalia, or whatever, and only his blood with send Al boy and Angel back to hell.
GeekGirl7934: And with the curse working and all. Angel went to hell good, which is not good.
Hornyguy: Oh. Goody.
GeekGirl7934: Goody?! Somehow I got the impression you didn’t tell Buffy I did the curse. You bastard.
Slayergirl390: Wow! Gee Will, nice vocabulary.
Deadboy2: Even if she knew about it, she couldn’t have stopped it from happening.
Hornyguy: You’re defending me?
Deadboy2: No! Duh! I was comforting Buffy.
Slayergirl390: Yeah, Stupid. But I forgive you.
Hornyguy: Yeah. Since it was you two participating in the mattress Olympics that lost Angel’s soul in the first place.
Slayergirl390: Now your pushing it.
Hornyguy: Hey! Not everyone can get a gold medal.
Slayergirl390: You don’t know that. That’s private.
Hornyguy: No. But I’d like to find out.
Hogirl: Gee, that screen name is accurate.
Hornyguy: So is yours.
Hogirl: All I can say is: You better be glad you’re not saying that to my face.
GeekGirl7934: Hey! Let’s be civil. The gang hasn’t been whole for a long time.
Slayergirl390: Still isn’t.
GeekGirl7934: Oh well. What do you guys want to talk about?
Hogirl: I want to know something, why do we have these weird screen names?
Slayergirl390: Stumped me there.
Hogirl: And why are there numbers beyhind your screen name?
Slayergirl390: Cause it’s been used already. Although that is weird.
Hornyguy: There is something wrong here.
Slayergirl390: What?
Hornyguy: I we continue like this, we’ll end up with a lovey dovey, sappy ending.
Slayergirl390; And?
Hornyguy: To make things more interesting, why don’t we fight until our parents drag us off line at 4:00.
Slayergirl390: Good idea. You bastard, you didn’t tell me.
Hornyguy: Like it would have mattered.
Deadboy2: Matters plenty, I’m in hell.
Hornyguy: Like I care.
Slaygirl390: I do. You never considered my or Angel’s feelings.
GeekGirl7934: Yeah! All you care about is yourself.
Hornyguy: Shut up, Geek!
GeekGirl7934: Why don’t you, asshole.
Online host: Watcher has entered the room.
Slaygirl390: Giles! What are you doing here? Online? In a teens chatroom?
Watcher: I don’t know.
Online host: Slayergirl389 has entered the room.
Slayergirl390: Kendra?
Slayergirl389: Yes. What is going on?
Slayergirl390: This is too weird, I’m leaving
Online host: Slayergirl390 has left the room.
GeekGirl7934: So, um, Kendra. You like cats?
Hogirl: I’m leaving too.
Online host: Hogirl has left the room.
Hornyguy: So this chat has gone from lonely, to mysterous, to forgiving, to angry, to odd.
Online host: Gypsybitch has entered the room.
Hornyguy: OK. It’s official, this chatroom is linked to heaven and hell. I’m leaving.
GeekGirl7934: Me too.
Online host: Hornyguy has left the room.
Online host: GeekGirl7934 has left the room
Watcher: Jenny, I wwwwwwwwwwaaaaaannnnnnnyyyyyyyyy gggggg’[
Gypsybitch: Rupert? Rupert?
THE END
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