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Beaming with pride, Joyce Summers showed her guests around the gallery. She had a number of stunning new additions to the gallery which her escort for the evening had brought from South America. Interest in them had proved so great that she had arranged a special showing that night. The number of purchases her guests made had made it well worth the effort.
As she took the opportunity to relax in a corner after a heavy round of mingling, sipping at a glass of wine, she felt a cool arm snake around her waist. She leaned back against his chest and sighed. "It's going well, isn't it, luv?" he remarked.
"Very well. Your South American artifacts are very popular. Wherever did you get them?"
"You don't want to know, pet. Let's just say that their previous owner isn't going to miss them."
"This has been exhausting though."
"Well, we can go out for a drink or you can take me home and make me a cup of hot chocolate."
"With marshmallows - I bought some of them especially for you."
"Very nice - provided the Slayer isn't home."
"No, she should be out late tonight. I really don't understand her hostility to you."
"Well, pet, maybe it has something to do with us being mortal enemies and all?"
"But you helped her."
"True - but I had my reasons. Don't remind me."
"But you you did help."
"Sshh," he whispered in her ear, "I have enough problems keeping the demon under control when I hear the Slayer mentioned."
"Be nice, Spike."
Suddenly Joyce jumped and exclaimed, "Oh my God!"
"What is it, pet?"
"Xander! What the Hell is he doing here! Spike, hide!"
"Why?" he asked, not unduly perturbed.
"Because he'll tell Buffy."
"Right .Where should I hide?" he asked, looking around.
"Just outside. With any luck he's only got a message or something! It's not as if he's interested in art!"
Spike quickly made his way to the door, keeping guests between him and Xander, and then slipped outside. Joyce quickly went up to Xander and said, "Xander! What a surprise to see you here. Are you looking for Buffy?"
"No, Mrs Summers. I've got a message from her. Your mobile's turned off. She said that she might stay at Willow's tonight and not to worry."
"That's very considerate of you, Xander. But there was no need for you to come personally."
"No problem. Faith and I were passing this way."
"Faith? Where is she?"
"Waiting outside for me."
Joyce's eyes widened in alarm. She quickly said, "You had better go then, Xander. Mustn't keep her waiting."
"Okay, I'm gone," he said.
Joyce waited a moment and rushed out the door, looking around anxiously for Spike. She almost ran into Faith who was eyeing her curiously. "Oh! Faith, hello. I've, umm, lost a guest."
"Not a good idea in Sunnydale. Should I help you look?"
"No, no, it's fine. He's probably inside. You two go on. These buyers can be so elusive."
Faith frowned at her and then shrugged her shoulders. "Come on, X-man."
As they went off, Joyce looked frantically for Spike who eventually emerged from a bush, dusting himself off. "Bloody Slayers," he muttered crossly. "One's bad enough. Two is a complete pain."
Joyce breathed a sigh of relief. "Spike, you're all right. I was afraid that you might have run into Faith."
"She's no problem," he stated, "the only reason I don't take her down is because of Buffy."
She shook her head and then leaned against him. "God, I really do need a drink after that," she said, "talk about stress!"
"Let's go then, luv."
"I just tell my assistant I'm leaving," she said and turned to go back inside. A few moments later Joyce emerged wearing her coat. "I'm *dying* for a drink, Spike."
"Not a particularly good term to use around me, ducks," he chuckled. Then he thought for a moment, "The Bronze is out - Slayer territory. I don't think you'd fancy Willy's. But I know a nice little bar - very artsy. Just your style."
"Fine, I'll trust your judgement in bars if it's anything like your judgement in art."
When they reached his car, he held the door open for her and she got it and asked, "A new car, Spike?"
"Yeah, don't worry. The previous owner won't miss it."
Somewhat puzzled, Joyce shook her head, fastened her seat-belt and then steadied herself as Spike burned rubber. "You drive fast. Don't you get a lot of tickets?"
"Nope," he replied with a smug grin, "cops never manage to get around to giving me any." He chuckled wickedly.
"How extraordinary. I've never understood the police in Sunnydale."
They were soon in front of the bar. He parked the car and got out and held the door open for her. They went in and took a seat in the corner. Spike went over to get their drinks. As he was ordering them at the bar, Joyce took out her compact and checked her make-up.
"Mrs. Summers!"
Startled, she looked up to see Willow and Oz in front of her. Willow was wearing a lot of make-up on which made her look older and Oz was sporting a Gothic look. "Uh, Willow, what a surprise." She frantically looked over at Spike at the bar. Then she turned severe and stated, "Willow, you're far too young to be here."
"I'm not drinking. We're just going to see a musician friend of Oz's. What are you doing here?"
Thinking frantically and praying that Spike would see Willow and Oz and not come back to the table, she eventually said, "I was meeting a client. The gallery was too noisy to discuss business. I'm just going to leave."
Oz noticed the lack of empty glasses on the table, "Not drinking then?"
"No, no, absolutely not. He was. Took the drink with him. I don't drink. Much. Not with clients. And not tonight."
She distractedly noticed Spike approaching and stood up and said, "I really do need to go now." Her eyes connected with Spike's and he froze at he recognised Willow and then backed up. Joyce rushed out of the bar, leaving a confused Oz and Willow. Spike put the drinks down on ane empty table hurried out after her. Oz turned and saw a blond haired man in a black duster quickly exiting the bar. "Isn't that ...:?" he began.
Spike caught up to Joyce outside the bar, "Bloody Hell. The Slayer's friends are *everywhere* tonight."
Joyce sighed, "So much for that drink. Sunnydale is far too small. Come back to my place and I'll make you chocolate with marshmellows laced with rum. Buffy's out tonight."
"Sounds interesting. New version of egg nog then?"
They got back in the car and tore across the town again, happening to pass Xander and Faith on the way. Xander scratched his head after they had passed and said, "That looked like ... no ... that would be too weird, even for the Hellmouth."
Spike dropped off Joyce and parked the car some distance from the Summers' house, and then came back and joined her in the kitchen as she prepared the hot chocolate. "So where's the rum then, pet?" he asked.
She pointed and he opened a cabinet and took out a bottle. He came up behind her and put one arm around her waist while he poured a liberal measure of rum into both mugs. Joyce giggled and asked a little suggestively, "Are you trying to get me drunk, Spike?"
"Now would I do that?" he asked, squeezing her and eliciting another giggle. He whispered in her ear, "Rumour has it that you're keen on handcuffs?"
"Spike!" she shrieked.
He just grinned. Then he whispered, "You know, I'm kinda kinky myself." She shook her head helplessly. They went into the living room and sat on the sofa. Joyce put the mugs on the coffee table and Spike stretched his arms along the back of the sofa, leaned back and said, "Alone at last."
Just then there was a knock at the door. "Bloody hell," he said in disgust, "why don't we just go to Victoria bloody Station." Joyce went to the door and looked out.
"Oh my God!" she exclaimed, "It's Mr. Giles."
"Shit." Spike stated.
"Upstairs!" she said, "hide in my bedroom until he leaves!'
He winked at her, "Make it quick, luv. I'll be waiting."
She rolled her eyes and waited until he had disappeared up the stairs and then opened the door. "Rupert, can I help you?"
Giles came into the house. "Joyce, I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for Buffy."
"She's not here," she replied, "Xander said that she might stay at Willow's."
"No, no, that's all changed," he replied, "Something's come up and Buffy's meant to met me here. She said she needed a change of clothes."
"Oh," was all Joyce could say. Giles was surprised to notice a look of dismay creep across her face."
"If I'm keeping you from something, I could just wait down here for her," he said.
"No, no, no problem," she said, thinking frantically and then deciding she could manage this if Spike stayed upstairs and Giles in the living room. "Ah, do you want anything to drink?"
"No, I'm fine." As he said down, he noticed the two mugs of chocolate on the table. "Umm, am I interrupting something?" he said, pointing at the two mugs.
"Oh, no. I, uh, forgot I had made a hot chocolate and made a second mug by mistake," she said quickly.
"Oh well, if there's a spare," he remarked, picking up a mug and taking a sip. His eyes widened as he tasted the amount of rum. "Interesting hot chocolate," he said wryly.
"It was an experiment," she said a little desperately, "to see how it compares with egg nog. I thought I might set a new trend."
"Oh," he remarked in a neutral tone. At that moment the door banged open and Buffy came in.
"Giles," she exclaimed, "you're here already! That was quick." She looked at the mugs, "Hot chocolate?"
"Your mother's been experimenting with a sort of chocolate rum or rum chocolate," Giles observed.
Buffy gave her mother an odd look. At that moment, Joyce was doing a good impression of a deer caught in the headlights as she was desperately running through the possibilities of sorting out the current situation with the minimum of complications. Buffy shook her head and said to Giles, "I'll just go and change and then we can go."
"Very good," Giles observed, taking another sip of the chocolate.
Buffy ran up the stairs to the door of her room and then stopped. She sniffed the air, smelling cigarette smoke. She sniffed again - it was coming from her mother's bedroom. She went to the door, listened intently, and then opened it. She froze at the sight before her. Spike was sprawled lazily on her mother's bed, contemplating the ceiling while smoking a cigarette. Noticing her standing there in shock, he remarked cheerfully, "Slayer."
"Spike!" she shrieked, "you're dust!"
Spike leapt up and grabbed a chair which he held in front of him. "Slayer, that's no way to treat a guest!" he insisted.
Hearing Buffy's shriek, Joyce jumped and said, "Oh my God! Buffy, no!" and raced upstairs. Giles followed, wondering what on earth was going on. Joyce rushed up and grabbed Buffy, "No, Buffy, no! He's a guest!"
Giles came up behind Joyce and stared at Spike in Joyce's bedroom, his eyes widening in astonishment.
"What the Hell is he doing here?" Buffy demanded, eyes flashing.
"Just having a cup of hot chocolate, luv," Spike put in brightly.
"Oh, that's why there was so much rum in it," Giles observed. Then he said, "What is it with you Summers women and vampires?"
Joyce turned around in indignation, "It isn't what you think!"
Giles raised his eyebrows, "Oh. Vampire. Alcohol. Bedroom."
"He's only in the bedroom because he's hiding from you!"
"I'm not hiding from anyone," Spike growled.
"*What* are you doing with Spike?" Buffy demanded, her voice raising several octaves.
"He brought some items for the gallery," Joyce said, "Very valuable South American artifacts. This is a business meeting."
"Here. In your bedroom," Buffy said.
"Your mum makes a mean hot chocolate," Spike observed.
"Shut. Up," Buffy snarled, "or I will stake you anyway."
"That's not very hospitable, Buffy," her mother insisted. "He is my guest and a business colleague. Why don't you change and leave and Spike and I can have our chocolate?"
"There is no way I am going to leave you here with with that blood-sucking fiend!"
Spike grinned and said, "Compliments will get you everywhere, Slayer."
Just then, there was a knock at the front door. Giles said, "I'll get it."
He went downstairs and opened the door and was surprised to find Cordelia standing there. She brushed past him, remarking, "You really need to get a life, Giles. This is Saturday night. Where's Buffy?" He gestured upstairs and Cordelia went up the stairs and saw Joyce and Buffy arguing furiously in front of Joyce's bedroom.
"Look, I don't mean to interfere in a domestic," she started to say and then looked beyond them into the bedroom at Spike lounging against a wall, starting to light up a cigarette. "Oh my God," she said.
"Not quite, I think," Spike grinned, lighting up.
"PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT," Buffy ordered.
Cordelia looked at Joyce in shock, "Is boinking the undead a family tradition?"
Joyce shouted, "I'm NOT!" Joyce then took several deep breaths and said, "Calm. Calm. Everyone calm down. I think we need to take this out of the realm of the bedroom. Let's all go downstairs and sit down like civilised people and talk."
"And I can finish my hot chocolate," Spike put it.
"Giles took it," Joyce said.
"Bummer," said Spike, "but you can make me another!"
Buffy glared. Cordelia asked, "Will someone tell me what's going on here:? Why am I out of the loop?"
Buffy said, "All right. Let's talk. But if you try anything, Spike ..."
"I know, Slayer, I'm dust."
Buffy and Joyce headed downstairs followed by Cordelia and Spike. Spike caught up to Cordelia and put his arm around her waist. "I love your hair," he breathed in her ear, "especially the colour."
"Do you really?" Cordelia replied, "I'm using this new conditioner and .." she broke off, remembering who she was talking to. Spike grinned cheekily at her. She swallowed hard and rushed down the stairs.
Giles was sitting on the sofa again, sipping the hot chocolate. Spike said, "Oi, mate, that's mine."
Giles looked at him balefully, "Was. I really need a drink."
Spike snorted and pleaded, "Joycie, make me another?"
"All right Spike, just sit down," she said, pointing at a chair. "Buffy, why don't you sit on the sofa with Mr. Giles?"
Buffy grudgingly sat down on the sofa. Joyce went to the kitchen while Cordelia looked around, deciding where to sit. "You can sit on my lap, pet," Spike leered.
Cordelia looked indignant, tossed her head and sat down beside Buffy. Joyce came back in with a cup of hot chocolate and sat down in another chair. She took a deep breath and said, "Perhaps we can sort this out now."
Buffy muttered, "I've got a stake that will sort it out."
"Buffy!" Joyce said, "Spike is a business associate."
"Spike's business associates are likely to end up dead," Buffy stated.
"Slayer, I'm hurt! How many business associates of mine do you know? Except Willy, who's still alive?"
"Well, " Buffy muttered, "I have no intention of leaving you alone with my mother."
"Right. Fine. Oi, Ripper, want to make it a threesome?" Spike said suggestively.
Giles turned a very bright shade of red and stammered, "Ah, um, n-no. I don't think that w-would be appropriate." Buffy noticed her mother was a little on the pink side as well.
"Spike, I'm not leaving you here with my mother AND anyone else. You are out of here."
Spike took a drink of chocolate and grinned at Joyce, "We may have to do this another time, pet."
"NO other time, Spike," Buffy insisted. Muttering to herself, she said, "I really hate him."
Spike took another drink and started to ogle Cordelia. Noticing his look, she said, "What?"
"Did I tell you how much I like brunettes with long hair?" he asked.
"Spike," Buffy said dangerously.
Spike pretended to pout, "Not even if I promise to return her alive and unharmed?"
"Spike, don't push it."
"Oh, all right, Slayer, have it your way," Spike said, standing up. He walked over to Joyce and picked up her hand and kissed it, winking at her. "I'll just have to leave now, won't I?" He winked again.
Joyce sighed and said, "All right, but your taste in artifacts is excellent."
"I know."
Buffy was now standing, tapping a stake against her leg. "So leave then," she said.
"Right. Night, Slayer.Watcher." He went out the door.
Buffy turned to her mother and said, "Spike is dangerous. We're going to to disinvite him."
"I'm sure that won't be necessary, dear," Joyce said.
Giles got up and said, "Well, we've got a minor demon to deal with."
Buffy said, "I'll be right back," and ran upstairs and quickly changed and came down. "Let's go, Giles."
"Good night, Joyce," Giles said.
Buffy turned as she went out and ordered, "Don't let Spike in."
Joyce smiled benignly, watching her daughter and Giles drive off. As soon as they were soon, Spike re-emerged and slauntered up, "Re-heat my chocolate, luv?"
"Absolutely, Spike."
He grinned winningly at her.
END
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