“Crikey look at this bugger!”
Buffy looked on shocked as the dishevelled Australian with a shock of unkempt sandy coloured hair elbowed her out of the way and stood over the struggling body of the mutant swim team member she had captured in her net.
“You know folks” he exclaimed straight to camera with all the enthusiasm of a hyperactive 10-year old “I’m not familiar with this species but I’m confident in saying that it’s probably the most dangerous I’ve ever seen. Let’s poke it with a stick and see what happens”
He proceeded to do just that provoking furious snarling and convulsions from the mutant.
“Oh oh, something’s making him angry!” he declared emphatically.
“Yes, possibly you POKING HIM WITH A STICK?” Buffy suggested dryly.
Steve Irwin ignored her and continued speaking to the camera crew. “Let’s see what happens when I dangle my three year old daughter over him! Come here Shelia”
Buffy suddenly realised what the pressure she had taken to be tree branch pressing against her thigh really was. She looked down to see a small child gripping onto her leg for dear life and gazing at her father like the maniac he so clearly was.
“Don’t worry” she reassured her “You can come home with me” She caught Steve by his collar and easily hoisted him off his feet with her Slayer strength. “And you can go to an asylum for the criminally insane!”
“Crikey!” Steve exclaimed
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