Spike cautiously approached the cave with Buffy, Xander, and Dawn close behind. “The witch is in there,” he said, softly. “But she’s not alone.”
Buffy and Xander helped Spike moved rocks to clear the entrance.
Together they managed to clear them away and get inside.
Spike, able to see Willow, yanked the demon off of her.
Buffy began fighting the demon and Spike knelt beside Willow. “You okay?”
“She’s paralyzed,” Anya said. “From the demon.”
Spike looked at Willow’s stomach and flinched. He felt Willow began to relax and he wiped her tears away gently. “You’re gunna be okay,” he said.
Buffy killed the demon and Willow smiled. “That’s better,” she said. “Ow.”
Spike smiled. “You’re gunna be sore,” he said. “’M sorry about Glinda. I liked her.”
Willow smiled as Buffy came over. “Will?”
“I’m okay,” Willow said. “I’m ready to go home, though.”
Buffy looked up at Xander. “If you pick her up, Spike and I will climb out. Then you can hand her to Spike and then you can come out,” Buffy said, going toward the entrance.
Spike followed Buffy without question and climbed out. He held his hand out and helped Buffy.
Buffy jumped out and smiled at Spike. “Thanks.” She looked back into the cave. “Okay Xander!”
Carefully, Willow was eased out of the cave and her arms slid around Spike’s neck.
Spike lifted the wounded witch into his arms and looked down at her. “You alright?”
Willow nodded and Xander looked at Spike with disgust.
Buffy rested her hand on his arm. “Don’t,” she said, as Anya and Dawn climbed out.
At home, Spike carried Willow upstairs and left once Buffy and Xander started fussing over her.
The next night, Willow went to the school basement to visit Spike. “Spike?” She called nervously.
“Red?” Spike asked, coming into view.
“Hi,” Willow said. “I wanted to thank you for helping me.”
Spike smiled a little. “It’s okay,” he said, softly. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m better,” she said, slowly approaching him. “Buffy told me about your soul. Are you doin’ ok?”
“It’s hard but Buffy hasn’t killed me yet so there’s gotta be hope,” he said.
Willow looked at him closely. “It doesn’t look like you’ve been eating or sleeping,” she going toward him.
“I haven’t,” Spike admitted.
Willow frowned. “Well come for a walk with me and I’ll get you something to eat,” she said, softly.
Spike looked at her and saw the genuine concern in her eyes. “Alright,” he said, defeated.
Willow smiled and led him out of the basement.
After Willow had gotten Spike some blood and herself a cup of coffee, they went for a walk.
Buffy, who had just left for patrol, noticed them and came up to them. “Hey Guys,” she said.
“Hey Buffy,” Willow said.
Spike smiled a little at Buffy as a hello.
Buffy smiled back. “What are you guys up to?” She asked.
“I took Spike to get him something to eat,” Willow said. “He looks a little better now that he’s had something to eat.”
“Yeah you do,” Buffy said, to him.
Willow smiled. “Well, I think I can make it home from here and you guys go patrol,” she said. “Thanks Spike.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Spike said, as she continued to walk down the side walk. Then he looked at Buffy unsure of what to say.
“Would you like to patrol with me?” Buffy asked.
Spike nodded. “If you want me to,” he said.
Spike began to relax as he and Buffy walked through the cemetery.
“Spike?” Buffy asked softly.
“Yeah?” Spike asked, looked at her.
“Do you… um… do you still love me?” She asked, looking up at him.
“I don’t know,” Spike said, pausing to lean against a headstone. “Buffy, I don’t even know what day it is. There are days when I don’t even remember my name."
“What’s happening to you, Spike?” Buffy asked, genuine concern in her voice. “You were crazy when I first saw you. Then were fine and then crazy again. I want to help you if you let me.”
“I don’t think you can,” Spike said, looking her with tears in his eyes.
Buffy frowned at his tears and walked over to him. “I can,” she said. “Don’t tell me I cant.”
“How can you help me?” Spike asked.
“I can help you be Spike again,” Buffy said.
“Spike’s a monster, Buffy,” Spike said, softly. “I don’t wanna be a monster anymore.”
Buffy reached her hand out to his and he didn’t flinch away from her so she held it. “There’s a good man in you Spike,” she said, softly.
Spike looked up at her. “How can you say that?” He whispered.
“Because I believe in you,” she said.
Slowly she moved her lips toward his and when he didn’t move away, she pressed her lips against his gently.
Spike surrendered to her lips and kissed her back.
She pulled away after a moment. “Are you gunna let me help you?” She asked.
Spike nodded unable to trust his voice.
She leaned her head on his shoulder and wrapped her free arm around his waist.
Spike’s arm went around her shoulders and he kissed her hair.
“Spike, I can help you love me again,” she whispered into his ear.
“I don’t think I’ll need help loving you,” he said, softly.
Buffy smiled and pulled away. “Let’s finish patrolling then we can go home,” she said.
Spike nodded and entwined his fingers with hers.
A few hours later, Buffy took Spike back to her house.
Xander was there talking to Dawn and nether looked happy to Spike, holding hands with Buffy.
“Why did you bring him here?” Buffy asked.
“I want him here,” Buffy said, squeezing his hand soothingly.
“Why?” Dawn asked.
“We need each other,” Buffy said.
“We don’t need the guy who tried to rape you in the same universe as you,” Xander said.
Buffy glared at him. “I don’t care if you have a problem. I’ve lost too much to keep you guys happy. I’m not gunna lose Spike again,” she growled.
Xander couldn’t come up with anything to say to that. “Buffy, he tried to rape you,” he flared.
Spike closed his eyes to hold back his tears.
“I don’t care,” Buffy said.
“How can you not care?” Dawn asked.
“Because I want him with me,” Buffy said, looking at her sister. “If things are gunna be better between us then we need to work through everything together.”
“But what about me?” Dawn asked. “How am I supposed to work past it?”
“Dawn…” Spike said, very softly.
“Don’t you dare say you’re sorry. Telling me your sorry for abandoning me isn’t gunna change the fact that you did,” she screamed at him.
“I had to,” Spike said, looking up at her.
“You never have to leave the ones you love because you made a mistake,” she flared, going toward him.
“This time I did,” Spike said, releasing Buffy’s hand.
“Not without telling me why,” Dawn said, standing in front of him. “You have no idea what it was like for me to find out that you left and have no idea why. You didn’t even come to say goodbye to me,” she whispered, tears falling from her eyes.
“I didn’t want to say goodbye,” he said. “I was coming back.”
“I didn’t know that,” Dawn said. “I wanted to see and talk to you.”
“Dawn..” Spike said, softly.
“Do you love me?” Dawn asked.
“Always,” Spike whispered.
“Then why did you break my heart?” Dawn asked.
“I didn’t mean to,” he said.
“But you did!” Dawn yelled. “Nothing you ever say or do is gunna make it better.”
Buffy slid her hand into Spike’s and squeezed his hand. “Dawn, I’m not saying it has to be now or anytime soon, but you should try and get past what happened,” she said.
“How can you just get over it?” Dawn said.
“Because I want things to be okay,” Buffy said. “It wasn’t Spike’s fault. I cant place blame on him. I did a lot of things also.”
“Yeah well, Spike and I never hurt each other like you did,” Dawn said, going upstairs.
Spike bowed his head and sighed. “She’s right.”
Buffy rubbed his back. “Let’s get some sleep,” she said, softly.
Spike looked up startled as Buffy took him upstairs. “Buffy, this isn’t a good idea,” he said, tensing up.
“Spike, please relax,” she said, leading him to her bed. She sat him down and kissed his forehead softly. “It’s okay.”
Spike trembled slightly at her touch. “Buffy, I’m not ready,” he said.
Buffy rested her head on Spike’s. “Shhh,” she said, soothingly. “We’re just gunna sleep. I need you at my side tonight.”
Spike’s eyes met hers and there was warmth and tenderness in them. A little reluctantly he leaned up and kissed her.
Buffy cradled his face and leaned into him a little. Carefully she pushed him down and climbed on top of him.
Spike slid his arms around her waist and stroked her back. “Buffy,” he whispered.
Buffy kissed him softly before laying next to him. “See?” She whispered, turning on her side to face him. “We wont do anything ‘til we’re both ready.”
Spike ran his finger down her jaw. “You’re so beautiful,” he said.
Buffy smiled and blushed. “I missed you,” she said, shyly.
“I missed you too,” he whispered. “I wish Dawn wasn’t mad at me though.”
“I don’t know when you’ll get your wish,” Buffy said. “She missed you and she loves you but she was so crushed when she found out you just left.”
“I probably should’ve left some kind of note for you two,” Spike said.
Buffy snuggled up against him. “Lets not worry about it,” she whispered. “I wanna sleep and we’re both tired.”
Spike nuzzled her hair and began to purr. “Goodnight Pet,” he whispered.
“Goodnight Spike,” Buffy said, falling asleep.
A few hours later, Dawn slid into Buffy’s bed and snuggled up against Spike. “I love you,” she whispered.
Spike murmured and turned on his back. He pulled Dawn close to him and settled back down.
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