Disclaimer: These characters are not mine and I would never dream of taking credit for them. They belong to Mutant Enemy and all their big guys and the Great-And-Powerful Whedon of Joss or some such nonsense.
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“I love you, Willow.” Standing on a hill, about to destroy the world, limitless power at her fingertips, and that damn little word made her stop. Love. It was so trite. Like Xander loving her was going to make her stop. Like anybody loving anybody was going to make anything stop. She could feel them, all of them. She could feel their love, nearly blocked out by pain and suffering. No, this had to be. Love wouldn’t save them.
‘But love is why you’re doing this.’ That small voice in the back of Willow’s mind whispered gently to her. It was Her voice. It had been ever since they’d met. ‘You’re doing this for love. You loved me, and now you want to hurt the people that hurt me.’ Why was She speaking in the past tense? She was still here, would always be here. She’d promised.
‘Willow, you’re destroying the world out of love. You don’t want them to suffer anymore. You can’t say you don’t believe love is powerful. It’s the driving force behind everything you’re doing. You’ve seen what it can do.’ It wasn’t true. She didn’t love them, these people who would live in this rotting world with a fake smile plastered on to hide the pain they felt. She couldn’t even stand to look at them. She would destroy them all, and then she could be with Her again.
‘Look at yourself, Willow. You’re becoming the one thing I didn’t want you to be. You’re abusing your power and shutting out your friends. Do you really think this is what I’d want?’
Willow looked down at Xander cowering on the ground, trying desperately to stand back up. She looked at the dark sky above her and felt the power surging through her veins. All this…it was for Her…it was…
Her knees hit the ground. God, She was right. What had she become? She’d murdered. She was going to end everything so that she wouldn’t have to feel the pain of living in the world alone. She was doing this all for herself, never once thinking about what She would’ve wanted. She cried heavy tears as she thought about the time they’d spent together. She never wanted Willow to get this far. And now, to do this all in Her name…
“God, baby, I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry…” She was sick onto the ground, her stomach clenching into knots. But how, how could she go through life now, knowing what she’d done, what she was doing? Looking at all the pain she was causing, seeing her best friend writhing in pain at her own hand, how could she live with herself? How can I live without Her?
She threw her head back to look up at the sky, and she called it all back. Everything she’d been unleashing on the world, all the spells, all came rushing back to her. They came ripping through her body, and she thought she distantly heard Xander yelling her name. No, this was it. This had to be. Her body convulsed and she was sick again, the bile mixing with blood this time. Her eyes rolled back as it all came flooding in. White-hot pain flashed through her, and her blood boiled. Her heart pounded against her chest so hard it hurt. Her skin broke out in deep wounds, spilling her blood onto the ground. Everything went red, out of focus. I’m coming, Tara. I’m coming. And then it was over.
Buffy and Dawn found them later. Xander was on his knees on the blood soaked ground, holding his friend’s body, stroking the red locks, muttering. “IloveyouWillow, IloveyouWillow, IloveyouWillow….”
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