"I love you! I love you so much!", Cordelia whispered and pushed herself closer to Lindsey. She still couldn't believe that this had happen. She thought she was still dreaming. Softly she smiled to him when she felt his lips on her forehead. It was such a wonderful feeling, a feeling which deeply touched her soul. Everything felt right, but it was damn wrong. She was the seer, the one who was on the good side. He was the lawyer on the evil side. Against all odds they fell in love with each other, connected by a strong feelings - connected forever. But they had to hide, they had to hide their love. All this things caused an uproar inside of her. She betrayed her friends, she betrayed the ones who were important to her.
Lindseys voice let her lose her thoughts. "Don't bother, my little angel." He wished he could take away the pain inside of her, but he couldn't. He exactly knew what depressed her. He knew that she couldn't do the hide and seek anymore, but there wasn't any other way. They were enemies in the game between good and evil and still destiny brought them together, gave them the greatest love of all. The fight against their feelings was nonsense. Both tried to deny them, but they were to strong. They couldn't escape. After an eternity full of desire and loneliness they came together and now they would never let the other one go away. He loved her, he loved her with every single beat of his heart.
"I can't, Lindsey!" Cordelia answered and looked into his shiny blue eyes. "I can't stop thinking about the whole situation." She sighed and looked down, so that he couldn't see all the pain and sorrow in her eyes.
It really bothered him to see her so unhappy. His fingers touched her chin and softly forced her to look up.
"I know it's hard, my little angel, but they wouldn't understand it." His thumb softly skimmed over her lips. "Just think about us when we are together."
Cordelia grabbed his hand, which was still holding her chin, and held it closely. "I try, but it's so hard." For one little moment she was silent and kissed his palm. "Let us go away, Lindsey, far away from here!"
"Go away?" He repeated and put his hands on her cheeks. He looked at her and tried to find something in her eyes, a little hint that everything she has said wasn't serious.
"It's the only way to be happy, to be together." She continued and hoped to resolve all doubts. "Angel and the others will hate me if they knew we love each other. They would believe I betrayed them and if Wolfram & Hart would know you're not save anymore." She kissed him with all the love she felt. She tried to forget the pain she felt to think about losing him forever. She could never cope with it, it would felt like somebody pulled out her heart. Never ever she would fell in love again.
"Where do we wanna go?" Lindsey asked when Cordelia broke away from him.
"Anywhere. Anywhere nobody knows us, where we can be together." She responded and looked appellative to him. It was the only possibility their love could survive. They had to leave their present behind to have a future together.
Lindsey lowered his head and got up. This was insane, but he also knew that this was the only way they could take. Tensely his hands ran through his hair and he looked outside the window. His gaze slit over Los Angeles which looked like a ocean full of lights. The night was like a protecting coat - they could be together, could share hours of happiness, could devote to their love. But just some hours, when it was dark, wasn't enough for him. He wanted her 24/7, 12 month, 365 days a year - he wanted her forever and always.
He turned back to her, went to the bed and put his clothes on. "Let us got away! Today!" He kissed her so passionately that Cordelia melted away. She wrapped her arms around his hips and held him tightly. She still held him, when he brought her to the door. She didn't know if the pure happiness was the reason for feeling so dizzy or were Lindsey's lips the reason.
"We will meet in the alley behind the hotel." She whispered in his ear as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
"I'll be there." He responded und pushed her softly out of the door. "Hurry up, my little angel."
Cordelia nodded and ran away hastily.
"Angel! Wesley! Fred! Gunn!" Cordelia screamed for her friends. As nobody answered she walked to her desk. Some personal stuff was here and she wanted to take them with her. As well she wanted to keep some memories of all of her friends.
"Cordelia! Hi!" Fred welcomed her standing in behind.
Nervously Cordelia shrugged and looked to her.
"What are you doing here late at night?" Fred asked.
Rashly Cordelia tried to find an excuse. "Ahh … I forgot something in the office I need." She closed the drawer, she opened some seconds ago. "Where're the others?"
"They wanna go to Lindsey."
Immediately a bad premonition came to her heart. "What do they want?"
"They wanna bring the whole Lindsey thing to an end."
"No, no!" Cordelia repeated again and again. Panic aroused in her. "They can't to this. They must not kill him."
Before Fred couldn't say anything Cordelia passed her fast. Tears ran out of her eyes as she ran along the street. Faster and faster. She had to save him no matter what.
A loud knocking on his door disturb him by doing all the preparation for the escape. Who was this at this time of the night? Cordelia? His heartbeat stopped. What happened? Did something went wrong? Quickly he walked to the door and opened up.
"Angel!" He said surprised by seeing his greatest enemy in front of him.
"Hi Lindsey!", Angel replied. "I just wanted to be polite before I will send you to hell."
Angel just finished his sentence as he swung his axe which missed Lindsey just some inches. Panicky he ran into his sleeping room and closed the door. His fingers were shaking, when he put the chair under the door knob. He knew that he couldn't escape from Angel, that he would kill him, but he couldn't let this happen. Cordelia would never survive this. He had to fight for her. She was everything he thought of, the one thing that kept his will to live alive.
Angels axe hit the door hard. It wouldn't take long and he would come in. Lindsey ran to the window, opened it and climbed on the stairs outside. If he had the chance to go down, he could meet Cordelia in the right time, but when he looked down he recognized Wesley and Gunn, who blocked his way. The only possibility to escape was going to the rooftop. Quickly he climbed up the ladder to the top, Angel close to him. He jumped on the roof. Just one thing pushed him forward - to be together with Cordelia. He tried to find a way to escaped, but there was no one. He lured himself into a trap.
Streamed with tears Cordelia saw Wesley and Gunn.
"Where's Lindsey? Where is he?" She asked panicky and grabbed Wesleys shirt. "Where is he?"
"On the rooftop." Wesley replied confused and didn't understand why Cordelia was so desperate. "Is everything alright … ?" Before he could finish, she rushed off. The terrible feeling inside her heart got stronger and stronger with every little second. Her legs were hurting because of the effort climbing up the stairs. With all her power she pushed open the door to the rooftop. At the same moment she froze. Breathing hard Angel were standing in the middle turning is back to her. One hand held the axe smeared with blood. Cordelia knew to whom the blood belongs. Her heart broke into a million pieces. Slowly she walked to Angel till she noticed Lindsey lying on the floor covered with blood.
"Noooo!" She screamed very loud and got in her knees. This wasn't real, this couldn't be real. She was sleeping in her bed and this was just a nightmare.
"No!" She repeated again and again and pulled Lindsey into her arms. "You must not die. I love you, I need you." She cried unrestrained, swept softly over his face, kissed him, trusting that he will be awake again.
Everything in front of his eyes turned black, his body was cold. He felt the blood running out of his wound. He knew that he would die, that his life was over. The bright light attracted him magically and he wanted to be released from all this pain. He didn't want to feel this agony anymore, the pain he felt because of leaving Cordelia. He didn't want escape from the burning inside his soul. He heard a voice, tasted lips, felt her heat. With his last breath he opened his eyes.
"My little angel." He said with a husky voice.
"Lindsey!" Cordelias fingers slit over his face. "You're alive. Thank god, you're alive!"
"I won't …."
"No, don't say anything like that.", Cordelia begged. She didn't want to here those words, she didn't want to believe in the fact that he could die.
Lindsey took her hand and holding them tightly as he could. "I love you … forever." His fingers let go hers, his eyes got empty and his whole body slumped down. Lindsey followed the light. followed the salvation from all his pain, from his sorrow.
"Lindsey!!! Lindsey!!!!" Cordelia screamed his name full of despair. She pushed him close to her and didn't stop screaming his name.
Wonderingly Angel watched the scene, couldn't trust his eyes. Cordelia loved Lindsey. This couldn't be true. She would never love somebody like him, somebody who worked for the evil - never. But the evidence was in front of his eyes. He saw the tears, saw the grieve and saw the despair. He went to her, wanted to comfort her. It was his duty, he just followed his destiny. His hand touched her shoulder. Abruptly her expression changed - it became cold and hard.
"You killed him!" She shouted angrily and got up. "You killed him. He had to die in this silly fight." With all the hate she felt in this moment for her long time friend she hit his face very hard - again and again till the first anger faded away. She turned away and looked to Lindseys dead body. At the same time she made a decision.
"If this is the place we can be together, so may it be." She said to herself and climbed up the little wall, which should protect her from falling down.
Angel realised what she wanted to do. All he wanted was to save her, but everything happened in slow motion. He wouldn't save her - her destiny was decided and he knew it will be fulfilled in this moment.
Cordelia looked into the dark sky. "I will be with you!" She loved Lindsey and their love just could be fulfilled by being together in this place. Lindsey was the one who completed her - without him her life wasn't worth to live.
"I love you!" She whispered as she closed her eyes, spread her arms and let her fall down.
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