Scattered Pieces
She still remembered the first time she laid eyes on him. Stumbling through the dark streets, she had cornered him in that narrow alley, suddenly hungry for this young man despite her night of fruitful hunting.
He’d looked so surprised when he saw her, the innocent thing. But she felt the hurt that radiated from his poor impaired eyes, saw the cuts of another woman. She would fix that, she would heal all his hurt and make it all better.
"And I wonder, what possible catastrophe came crashing down from heaven and brought this dashing stranger to tears?"
She could see the wonder in his eyes, the hope that burned there. It inspired her, burning in the space her soul once resided, clearing the clouds in her mind.
"Nothing. I wish to be alone."
Poor confused boy. How they had twisted him. No matter, she liked them best twisted.
“Oh, I see you. A man surrounded by fools who cannot see his strength, his vision, his glory. That and burning baby fish swimming all around your head.” She could see them, the beauties. She would care for them, for him. She would kindle the fire.
“That's quite close enough. I've heard tales of London pickpockets. You'll not be getting my purse, I tell you.” She could smell the fear coming off of him in waves, the sweet lamb. It was delicious. She would make him so that he would never fear again. At least, until she wanted him to.
“Don’t need a purse,” she smiled. “Your wealth lies here... and here. In the spirit and... imagination.” They were beautiful…so shiny. And the soul, the glittering nasty jewel nestled so neatly in his chest. She would rid him of that, to be sure. What need would he have of jewels when he would have her?
“You walk in worlds the others can't begin to imagine.” She saw his expression soften, the wonder beginning to shine in his eyes. She liked those eyes very much, she decided. Perhaps she would pluck them out and keep them for herself. But no, her pet would need his pretty eyes, wouldn’t he? Well she would have them all the same.
“Oh, yes! I mean, no. I mean... mother's expecting me.” His consent given, which made it all the more enjoyable, she reached for the fastenings on his shirt. She wanted to tell him not to worry about his mother now, feeling the faintest pangs of jealousy at the mention of another woman, but she would cleanse his mind of her soon enough. He would be hers then.
“I see what you want. Something glowing and glistening. Something... effulgent.” She would give it to him. The gift all her family gave. Oh, it would be a lovely birthday for her sweet pet. She would throw a party, and all the family would come.
“Effulgent,” he whispered. He was close now, she knew.
“Do you want it?” she asked, enjoying the expression on his face. Such a fine face, she thought. She would sculpt him another. Then he might have two, just like her, and they could attend masquerades together. What fun he would be.
“Oh yes! God, yes.”
She wanted him as well, wanted to pluck the sparkly gem away and toss it to the daylight. He would never find it, she was sure, nor would he care to look. Holding him close, she shifted, sharp fangs of her mask slicing into his flesh. He cried out in pain, until she took the first pull.
He tasted of something different, something glowing and shining. Something effulgent.
As she cut her wrist to let the blood flow into her new pet’s open mouth, she felt a sense of pride in this. She liked this one very much, and was sure Daddy and Grandmother would enjoy him as much as she meant to.
Looking down at the pale face of her new companion, she smiled ecstatically. Taking him into her arms, she walked out of the alley and down the dark and damp street. There were many things to do before he woke. She had to plan his party and find him a nice meal to eat. A lady in a shop, perhaps. He really was a beautiful creature, she thought. And he would be hers forever. Her sweet William.
She remembered all this and more as she contemplated the man she saw before her now.
“I can still see her floating all around you, laughing. Why? Why won't you push her away?” she demanded. Even as the words left her lips, she already knew the answer. She knew back then, didn’t she? Still she took him, thinking she could change what was fated to happen. In that moment, she cursed the stars, the wind, everything that had ever whispered in her ears. Why speak to her at all if she could do nothing but obey?
“But I did, pet. I did it for you. You keep punishing me. Carrying on with creatures like this.” The look of anguish in his eyes was almost more than she could take. But her William had fallen, and she could not pick him back up again; his pieces were scattered, and she could not find them all.
“I have to find my pleasures, Spike. You taste like ashes.” And it was true. The fire, the bitter night had left him, leaving him a man, not the demon she made.
“So this is my fault now?” His anger with her did not disturb her in the least. Even now she could see him slipping from her, into the foggy distance that she dared not enter.
“You can't blame the ghoul, Spike. You're all covered with her. I look at you... all I see is the Slayer.” In that moment, she saw with the utmost clarity; saw with the gift that cursed her into the fog and out into the sunlight. Its brightness frightened her, and seeing her Spike in it’s radiance, she turned to leave him.
Knowing she had lost, she faced the shadows, the only place that held her. She had lost both Daddy and now Spike to the sunshine, leaving her with the cold night as her only lover. The stars caressed her pale skin, and then she disappeared into her eternity.
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