" Mr. Spiker, I've gathered from the other two that you were the one who wanted to seek counseling."
"Yeah, though I've begun to wonder why. I've gotten nothing but glares from completely evil man and mad mutterings from Dru. Not that that's out of the ordinary, but…"
"All right then, why did you want counseling originally? "
"Well, the situation is just not right here."
"I'd have to agree with that assessment. Are you aware that Emily is completely insane?"
"She's been off her rocker ever since I met her. This is not exactly a new concept for me, doc."
"Has she been on any medication?"
"Um, no Not since I've known her."
"All right, but we'll talk more about this later. I gather that there is some tension in your relationship."
"That's one way of putting it. The man is a guest in my bloody house and he's trying to muscle in on my girlfriend. I thought it would be better when he stopped seeing that Slayer girl, when he got back to his old self."
"Slayer?"
"Yeah his old girlfriend, Buffy Slayer. He was so nice-nice whipped when he was with her it made me sick, but now I just wish he'd go back to her. Or that I could kill him."
"Murder was still a crime the last time I looked, Mr. Spiker. Besides, wouldn't your disability make it difficult?"
"I'm not as disabled as he thinks I am." He stood up and extracted a cigarette from the pack in his jacket. " Do you mind?" he asked, gesturing to the pack, then lit up before she could reply.
"Sure, go right ahead. How long have you been able to walk?"
"For about a month now. And I haven't been advertising it, so don't give it away, eh?'
"Why haven't you told them?"
" Listen, baby, you may be cute in that completely not my idea of cute way, but you lack perception. Revenge. The perfect revenge, Not just plain old hit Angelus in the head with a tire iron revenge, but perfect. So I've been waiting." He took a long, angry drag on the cigarette.
"That seems a tad too destructive. Wouldn't it be better to tell Emily your feelings? I'm sure if she knew how you felt, she'd discourage Mr. Angelus."
"You must be in a land even farther away than Dru's to think that. She's completely insane. She doesn't even know what's going on-most of the time. If it weren't for that, I'd move on. She thinks it's just like old times. Her two boys fighting over her." He ground out his cigarette. " Well, I'm going to win this fight. I want it to be like it was before."
The deeply feminist Sarah Page arched an eyebrow. " When she was needy and clinging?"
"No when we were both strong. Now she's healed and I'm back to my old self and that bloody Angelus is in the way. Well, I'm going to get rid of him."
"Mr. Spiker, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. I can not have one of my clients threatening another." She stood and opened the door. Spike shrugged, dropped back into his wheelchair and rolled towards the door. Just before he went out, he twisted his head around and grinned at her. " You know that part I said about you being cute, ducks? I didn't mean a word of it."
Spike wheeled himself into the waiting room, where he noticed Drusilla was pouting. " What's wrong, pet?"
"Angel won't play puzzles with me," she whined, gesturing towards the kiddie table in front of her.
"He won't, will he? What a naughty Angel he's being! Come on, luv, let's go buy you a cat."
" And a ferret! Then we'll put them in a box and the cat will gulp down all the ferret. She slid onto his lap and looked inquiringly at him. " Do you have a secret, Spike? Miss Edith said you'd been keeping something from me."
Smiled, he replied easily, " You've found me out, pet. I was going to get you a snake too, to eat the cat up too."
"With the ferret inside it. How delicious. I want a pretty snake with silver scales, Spike."
With that crisis averted, Spike turned toward Angelus. He was feeling generous today. Hell, he even felt sorry for the bloke. The revenge he was planning was going to be sweet and it involved a little something that Angelus had lost recently. Hopefully, the bastard would know who hit him. " I've got an idea. Why don't we go pick up a poor, unsuspecting girl form the Bronze, wine and dine her in our spacious mansion, then torture her until morning? If that's not enough, we can turn her and do it all over again."
A slow smile spread across the other vampire's features. " Yeah, that's a great idea. Just like old times. Can we get a blond?"
"Sure thing."
In her office, Sarah Page sat down on the desk chair. She reflected on the previous group with disappointment. Sure, they had been screwed up, and the girl had gotten her hopes up, but it had been a wash out. Her assistant was going to have to be more selective. She could do better than this on the Hellmouth. She looked at her next case: a werewolf and his girlfriend. This was the kind of case she should have all the time. With that thought, Sarah Page, counselor to the supernatural extraordinaire, prepared for her next session.
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