Disclaimer: This story arch is mine, these characters, however, are not. Please, please, please don't sue, thanks...
Xander stared at the orb, transfixed. Giles had given it to him for his nineteenth birthday and he wasn't exatcly sure he really wanted *this* as a gift. It was yellowish and the yellow glow came from within. It was very crystally and he was sure it must be breakable. Giles sent a page from a book about it, too. Xander wasn't entirely sure. Spike *yeesh* and Giles were the only ones to give him a birthday present. Spike didn't insult him everytime he suggested something which was birhtday present enough for Xander. Giles had given him a bit of reading matieral and an occult item, wow...
"I might as well read the damn thing," he said to himself, picking up the crinkled paper. "'The orb of Grenger is one of the most dangerous items of the occult,' Oh, thanks Giles. 'It is a world renowned protection from demons and vampires becaouse of a special chemical processed from within the depths of it's glass. it can burn there skin if it comes in close contact with it and it will repell the demons if held at arms legth from their faces. If broken, the orb creates a sort of portal to the last place you would expect to find yourself for all eternity...' Great, like that wouldn't happen to me at all, of course it would! 'It's also a symbol of luck and good fortune and is a very valuable peice of history in itself, though no one is quite sure where it came from.It is only rewarded to the most resonsable of people.' Wow, thanks Giles, really."
Xander was very, very pleased with his gifts now. And he was sure Buffy and Willow hadn't forgotten his birthday and that they would be coming in tonight for a party of sorts... Yeah, for sure, after all, they were his best of the best friends of all his minimal friends. No one could forget *his* birthday, anyway. Giles hadn't and Spike *yeesh* had been informed.If Spike*yeesh* King of Evil People You Definalty Don't Want Chained In Your Bathtub remembered that he was a man, now, a real one, then Buffy and Willow would for sure....
Xander found himself to be very, very tired, so he plopped down in his fold out bed and drifted into an uncomfortable sleep about where the orb and it's power might lead him if Anya ever saw it...
****
Xander heard crashing and laughter. "Huh? Mom are you going through my stuff?" he yelled we he could feel his voice working. He rubbed his eyes and saw it *was not* his mother that had woken him from his nap...
It was a gang of five vampires. "Oh, damn. How the hell did you get in my house?" he asked one, the closest. She a blonde female and looked like she would be the one to pin him to the headboard and get a litttle dirty.
"Oh, sweety, your mother let us in, of course. Said we came to wish you a happy birthday, which is not a lie..." she replied, inching closer to him. He took a step back and tripped onto the bed, fear in his eyes, his body trying to get off before she pinned him there like Faith...
"How... h...ow did you ...kn....know it was my birthday?" Xander's fear slurred his words.
"Oh, well, we had a fun time with your Slayer pal. We beat her up, man and she was heading here, to save you from us." The vamp chick smiled at him and he felt his heart beat faster. She straddled him on the bed and he tried to push her off him, but she was too strong. She leaned over and dug her teeth into Xander's thick neck. He bit his lip to keep from screaming and tried desperatly to look for something that would help him, but he didn't find anything at all..
The basement door was kicked open and Buffy came rushing through. Willow followed whispering some incantation and Spike *yeesh*ran in with a battle axe and a sardonic grin.Bufffy roughly grabbed the vampire from atop of Xander and he leapt up, gasping. He looked at Buffy, hoping his smile was thanks enough for right now. He didn't even notice the warm, red blood rushing down his neck, but Spike *yeesh* sure did. He kept eyeing Xander as he searched for some band-aids.
"Mmm...." Spike growled only just enough for Xander to hear. Xander shot him a look pure malis and he smiled that annoying, creepy way he did when he was satisfyed.
Xander found the band-aids and put a collection of three on his wounded neck. He then stood alongside Spike and landed a few punches and kicks to the fighting. Spike was slashing of heads and limbs, which xander found a little disturning. The limb was there until the vampire was dusted and then it dissapeared... *yeesh* Spike found it funny.
When all the vamps were dusted and everyone except Spike and Buffy were eshausted, Willow picked up the orb. "What's this, Xand?"
"Oh, Giles gave it to me for my birthday. It's supposed to repell demons and vamps. Yeah, I shoulda had the sense to use it... Wait, I have a great idea." He smiled and leapt up from the bed where he and Willow had been lounging. Willow handed it to him, a question in her expression. He took a good grip on it and threw it at Spike who screamed like a girl when it touched his leather jacket burning a whole right through it. But Spike didn't catch it. It dropped to the ground and opened a huge green gaping hole formed in the cement of the basement ground.
"Look what you did to my jacket, you bleeding sodding mother..." but Spike didn't get to finish his insult.
"Shut up about you jacket,Spike and look at what *you* did!" Buffy shrieked at him.
"I didn't do that, freak boy through the bleeding thing at me and I'm not letting it burn a whole right through my feelers, Slayer!"
"Feelers? Willow remind me again why we brought him here?"
"Because you love me, don't you Slayer? Say it, say it, come on..."
"Shut up, Spike.We brought you because we hate you and Giles is getting tired of you and where the hell did you get that idea?"
"Hmmm.... I seem to recall a few times we were planning to get married, luv..."
"Oh,my God. Do you have to bring that up *every* time we fight?"
"You guys *do* sound like an old married couple."
Spike fell to the ground pretending to dry-heave. Buffy kicked him hard in the ribs and he stopped, but stuck-out his tongue in an indignant way. Willow glared and Xander was trying to surpress his laughter at the whole situation.
"Well, then. Now that I h think my whole bleeding rib cage is snapped in two, what the bleeding hell are we gonna do with this?" Right after Spike finished asking, he felt himself being pulled into it. So did everyone else.
"Uhh... Xander?"
"We're gonna end up in the last place we expect to be."
"Here you mean?"
"Shut up, Spike."
********
Xander woke up in a comfy bed in a comfy room with a warm fire. There was armor and a collection of weoapans hanging on a rack next to him. "Hmm... where am I?"
He decided the best way to answer that question was to investigate and he found himself in a big, huge central room where Spike was standing, his hair all naturally blonde, not bleached and Buffy and Willow wearing huge, rounded dresses like Buffy had worn for Halloween in their Junior year of highschool.
"What happened?" Xander asked.
"Does it look like we bloody know, mate?"
"Of course not, *mate*. Eww.... I'm never saying that again..."
"Buffy, stop talking to him, I mean, one who is less wise and more in need of hurting from Slayers than me might just think..."
"Might just think what, Xander?"
"Come on, guys! Fighting and acting like little kids is not gonna get us any answers!"
Xander and Buffy continued to bicker and Willow and Spike took a seat on the cold ground to wait for them to finish up.
"You they never listen, red. I've been trying to tell Buffy to get over it for a long time..."
Willow got up and away from Spike and glared at him.
"What?" He truly looked like he had no idea. How immature...
"We're in the Middle Ages!' Willow screamed.
"What?" Xander and Buffy asked in unison.
"We are in the Middle Ages. Xander, was there any armor in your room?"
"Yeah, so?"
"You're a knight. Spike, was there any armor in yours?"
"No."
"Then we'll just have to figure out what you are, but Buffy, you must be a noble woman and I'm a healer, you know with the magicks."
"Wait, this burk is a knight and *I'm* not? That is not...."
"Shut up, Spike. The portal obviously thought you weren't fit fort the job!"
"Oh, I think I was, man f...."
"Spike, shut up before I make you."
"Make me, Slayer, make me shut up."
Buffy punched him hard in the mouth, making his lips bleed.
"Oww...."
"Now, then. What the hell are we supposed to do?"
"How am I supposed to know?"
The three friends all plopped down on the cold tile, exasperated expressions on there faces. Spike smiled. "This ought to be fun, mates."
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