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Buffy The Vampire Slayer > BTVS - Season Two
Searching For Meaning by FreeFall
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DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but the computer upon which this was typed, and my warped little mind, which conceived the notion of this particular story, while it did not imagine up the characters. In other words, don’t sue. I only get $15 a week by doing every chore possibly imaginable…Cinderella probably had it better…but I’m getting off track

AUTHOR’S NOTE: This no longer takes placed in my "THE-SEASON-FINALE-NEVER-HAPPENED" world. Yes…I’ve moved on…(damn it…and I had this great idea goin’ and half of it typed out…oh well…)

I LOVE FEEDBACK! HELP A FEEDBACK JUNKIE!

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Part Three
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"So flat you could watch your dog run away for three days," thought Buffy gloomily. She sighed and picked up the coffee pot and carried over to a couple at the far table.

"We asked for a refill 5 minutes ago!" the woman complained, "what took so long?"

"We were out mam," said Buffy politely as she poured the coffee.

"Well, we don’t want it anymore now, we have to leave," said the lady as she got up and started to leave. She slapped a 5$ bill on the table.

"Excuse me," said Buffy, "But that’s not enough for your meal,"

"With service like this," the man companion spoke up, "We shouldn’t have to pay the full price"

"Listen!" snapped Buffy, "The coffee was a little late because I needed to make more, instead of giving you the mud off the bottom"

"Well maybe you should be more prepared. You waitresses are underworked and overpaid," quipped the lady. She walked off with her companion and got into a 98 Mercedes Benz.

"That’s coming out of your paycheck!" called a grouchy voice from inside the kitchen

"ARG!" cried Buffy, "I’m going for my break! Which does not come out of my paycheck!" and with that, Buffy grabbed her backpack and marched out of the diner, leaving the customers starring.

"Jesus Christ," mumbled Buffy as she marched across the road and hopped a fence. She started walking into the middle of a vast wheat field. She walked and walked, until the diner became a little black lump. Ripping her hair net off, Buffy planted herself on the ground and opened her pack and brought out her stationary. Taking a deep breath she calmed herself.

"Calm down," she told herself, "Now, who to write…I’ve left Mom a note, and she’d probably pretty peeved to here from me still, I’ve gotten Giles and I’ve written Willow…Xander" she thought to herself, "I’ll write Xander" Taking her pen, she made a table out of her backpack and began to write.

Dear Xander,

How are you? How is Cordelia? Told any good lies lately?

Buffy knit her brow, no white out…oh well…she continued writing.

I’m sorry. You had to lie. I’m assuming Willow’s message wasn’t "Kick his ass" because Willow usually stays away from four letter words…or three letter words for that matter. I guess maybe I should thank you. If you had told me the truth, I’d probably be dead. Willow wouldn’t have finished in time. It was a good fight. You did a great job gettin’ Gile’s out. I miss you. And Willow, and Giles, and my mom, but I can’t face her just yet, let alone talk to her, so please say "Hi" for me. Ho hum…You know, its not until you’re sitting in the middle of a 20 hectare wheat field, do you realize just how small you really are. I mean, even me, Miss save the world from impending doom at LEAST 2 times a week, feels small. Geez, that sounds depressing, but that’s not how I meant it. I guess I mean it in the sense that, you should always try your hardest, but when all else fails, I guess you’ll always have that safety net knowing that you’re just one drop of water, one grain of sand in a trillion. I’m not sure how close I am to finding what I’m looking for just yet, I’m sure Willow told you all about my "quest". Right now I’m in the prairies. Yup, working at a diner so I can get some dough to finish my little soul seeking trip. I’m not sure where I’m headed next, Pike gave me some ideas (you know, my friend from LA, I met up with him, ask Willow, I made reference to meeting up with him ) Anyway, what else is there to say? I’m sorry I’ve messed your guy’s lives up so much, I’m sorry I’ve caused you so much pain? Sorry’s just don’t work anymore. Its funny, when you’re a kid, saying sorry always made it better…but then again, the monster under your bed wasn’t your boyfriend. I miss you Xander. Take care. Hope to see you soon,

Friend forever,
Buffy

Buffy put the letter in an envelope and stuffed in her bag. With that, she pushed herself up off of the ground and started heading back to the diner. Buffy sighed and swiped at her glossy eyes that were brimming with unshed tears. She laughed to herself, "Geez Buffy, this is not your style, I mean, a pink tunic with a hair net? Better get a move on finding what ever the hell it is your looking for," Buffy came to the fence across from the diner and stood for awhile starring at the pink, dusty old building, before she hopped over and went back inside.

The grouchy voice called from the bowels of the roach infested kitchen, "What do you do over in that field on your breaks? Better not be anything illegal!"

"I’m looking for something," mumbled Buffy as she set to cleaning up the table the rude couple had been sitting at, "I just wish I knew what…"



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