Doctor Manor shrugged into his white coat and went about collecting his clipboard and pen. Methodical by training, he was a star among Doctors who studied..well insanity. He was the sort of professional who viewed his patients as works of art. Self-Mutillation and the whats and whys of that particular patient were more glorious to him than a Monet. If asked, he'd deny taking any pleasure in putting his patients through numerous tests and watching their responses.
Lilian Hanovich smoothed down her skirt and adjusted her whitecoat. Her long blond hair pinned up in a severen bun, her movie diva face pale and without makeup. She scowled at the too eager face of her male collegue and followed him out of his office.
Lisamere Christine Johnson...Age 13..4'11...90 pounds, of mixed heritage, dark brown hair...
Lilian went over her notes once more, the young girl looked more like 9 or even 8 when they had brought her in. She had been pale, and bruised...yet her ribs had healed and the ugly scars down her back were healing nicely. The blond doctor paused in her thoughts, shaking her head...there was nothing 'nice' about this particular case.
Lisamere was now in a padded cell with a viewing window...so that Lilian could get a second thought on the young girl's condition. They had gone with out giving the girl her sedative....hoping that the previous dosage of medication would atleast keep her from hurting herself or another orderly.
A dark haired nurse came and spoke briefly with Doctor Manor. "No, no restraints..." was his quiet response. Lilian grimaced at the gleam in his eye then turned her attention to the window in time to see 3 male orderlies bring in the small girl.
Lisamere walked along without a struggle. After being escorted into the cell she smiled a rather child like smile and ran her fingers along the walls mumuring."Soft..." The sound like the fluttering wings of a dove.
She sat her self facing the window as if she had a knowing she was being watched. Spreading her gown around her like the skirts of a dress she smiled the same sweet smile.
"If I could do one thing to change the world..." She started in a soft voice, tinged with a childs southern slur." I'd stop all..."
She continued, as if in one of the Pagents of her early childhood. Then she stopped her smile fading and her eyes growing hooded as she drew her knees to her chest.
"An amazing....an amazin... an amazing example. An example! An example.....not right it's wrong, do right cuz it's good. Good girls are loved...I have a family. THEY ARE ALL BLIND! Blind....eyes wide shut....yet blind....in the dark. Dark things are in the minds....dark things....only to corrupt my, me, the corrupt and the innocent...no middle ground.....no middle ground....."
The small girl rocked herself in the padded cell as the professionals stared through the window at her. Dark skin, hair, and eyes...small body yet so much pain.....Her hair hanging down to her waist, her body somewhat skinny and the scars on her neck and back fading.
Lisamere looked up at the window and bared her teeth before curling back up and whimpering.
"Run from life....it hurts.....it hurts....so much red....so much white....white and red the colors of their caskets. Happy times and candyland dreams and so much red. To be nine, I get a cat when I'm nine, they come back in 5 days....I'm a good girl....I WAS A GOOD GIRL! They left....I wasn't bad....I wasn't bad....."
Doctor Manor scratched something else down on his clipboard, it was fascinating really. He did his best to look less enthused at the glare from his teary eyed female collegue.
Lisamere giggled....a long drawn out sound that turned into a whimper.
" No, no....I sit quietly and they go away...they go away....they go and come and come and never go....in my head they stay....They didn't have reservations! It was mine, my brain......my head.....mine.....but sharing is good. Good girls share...I was quiet, I didn't scream anymore....please don't....please don't....."
The small girl stood up and started to pace.
" I fix problems, I can fix them....I do it, I do it....and, and, and I'm good at it...I'm a smart little one, pretty little one. I WAS ALLWAYS THE PRETTIEST LITTLE ONE! Ugly is good, Ugly is good....better...better. I fixed them so they are happy now....dead is happy....the object of the problem needs to be removed. The only solution....straight cuts...little blood...they stay alive longer....with shallow cuts....but death is not the goal. No, the grave it not the goal....time is long and art is fleeting but the heart though stout and brave stil like muffled....muffled....."
She paused and scowled at the window." This is a private party...but no....you are nosy....nosy posy rosy so cosy watching the mouse in it's maze looks for the piece of smelly cheese!"
The Doctors watched as she slumped back in her corner her head bowed.
"I played the part....but ho....is it not an act....life is just a play really....with master actors....let us have an encore...if you please Mere baby...."
She sang softly." Some where over the rainbow...."
She paused, the Doctors smiling briefly at the familiar sweet voice then winced.
" I LOST MY MARBLES!! That rainbow....no gold...no gold just pretty colors sticky...sticky with sweets and red....red.....so much red and black...shiny black. Have I done good mommy, did I do good....they clapped for me mommy....but there is no MOMMY, there is no DADDY, Emmete, Greg, Marcus....Brian, Tyrone....there is just me.....me me me and all 3 of me.....yes me...all by myself....NO NEEDLES, I'll be good....I'll be quiet as a mouse...your house is so filled with dark....so dark.....and so much..too much."
Her expression turned dark." No heads attached, no bones unbroken...no skin....no skin....make pretty red trails with no skin. This is a problem, these tests and snooping and gowns, and pills....I'll fix it don't worry.... I'll fix it."
She looked up and smiled a slow and eerie smile." These Padded walls won't hold me...."
The 2 doctors stepped away from the glass at the sound of fading, insane laughing, and left quickly hearing the echo of sobs. Fixer stirred then was forced back down by the weight of the drugs whispering." These padded walls..."
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