When Spike woke, he felt the tingly feeling in his arms along with someone in his lap. He opened his eyes and his eyes widened at the sleeping slayer in his arms.
He tried to move his arms but cursed the drugs.
Buffy stirred and snuggled deeper into him. “Spike?”
“Buffy,” Spike said, in a raw voice.
Buffy picked up her head and her eyes filled with tears.
Spike frowned. “Buffy, don’t cry,” he said.
Buffy shifted so she could sit more comfortably in his lap. Her hands went to his face. “You’re really here,” she said. “That nice woman, Fred, said you wouldn’t be able to use your arms ‘til the drugs wear off.”
Spike pursed his lips. “I figured,” he said.
“What happened?” Buffy asked, softly.
“Are you talking about Dana or how I’m back?” Spike asked.
“How are you back and why didn’t someone call me?” She asked.
“I wanted to, Pet. I did but I didn’t think it was right,” he said.
“Not right?” Buffy asked, incuriously. “I loved you and I still do. I thought there’d be a small chance that you’d come back and I waited. God, every night I waited for you to slip in beside me and every morning you weren’t there. A large part of me has died and it made me feel so empty,” she whispered. “It was like being pulled from heaven all over again.”
Spike frowned. “Buffy, I’ve been so lost and confused since I came back. Angel told me you were in Europe but I had no idea where to begin looking. I didn’t want anyone to tell you because I didn’t know how to explain things to you. I just wanted to get back on my feet,” he said, tears in his eyes as well.
“But I could’ve helped you. I would’ve been able to be here for you. I have a really good feeling that Angel’s been making you crazy…” Spike interrupted her.
“He’s been doing more then that,” he grumbled.
“Like what?” Buffy asked.
“Like you didn’t love me,” Spike said, meeting her eyes. “Because I wasn’t him.”
“That’s not true,” Buffy said, softly. “Spike, please, believe me.”
“Buffy, I don’t know what to believe anymore,” Spike said, as Fred came in.
“Oh good, you’re awake,” she said, smiling.
Buffy climbed off of Spike and gave Fred some room to work.
Fred took the bandages off. “Well, you’re healing quickly which I expected. It shouldn’t be too long before you’re able to use your arms,” she said, re-bandaging them.
“Thanks Fred,” Spike said. “How’s Dana?”
“Andrew took her back to Europe,” Fred said. “She’s gunna stay with the other slayers I guess.”
“That’s good,” he said, and was able to move his fingers. “That’s better.”
Buffy smiled and her fingers slid under his. His fingers wrapped around hers and she squeezed gently. “Yeah it is,” she said.
Fred smiled. “I’ll check on you alter and maybe I can send you home,” she said.
Spike smiled back at her. “Thanks,” he said, and she left the two blondes alone.
Buffy moved up to Spike’s head and kissed him tenderly.
Spike kissed her softly and squeezed her hand. “Buffy, I missed you so much,” he said, against
her lips.
Buffy kissed him again. “I love you.”
“You do?” Spike whispered.
“With all of my heart and soul. Wait ‘til I get my hands on Angel. I’ll kick his ass into next year,” she said, softly.
Spike smiled. “I already tried that,” he said.
“Spike,” Buffy said, climbing in the bed with him. “Why did Angel tell you that I never loved you?”
“We were fighting for the cup of life and he was trying to distract me. It just pissed me off and I won. But it turned out to be a fake though,” he said, forcing his arms around her.
“You always did love me more then Angel,” she said, laying her head on his shoulder. “When
you’re released from the hospital, you can stay with me at my apartment,” she said.
Spike kissed her hair. “We should get some sleep,” he said.
Buffy smiled and snuggled deeper into him as they both fell asleep.
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