Spike leaned against the window as the rain hit the glass making a tiny, sad melody that fit his mood perfectly.
“Of course, I’m leaving,” he whispered not turning around.
“So, that’s it,” was the soft, sad reply. He could hear a shuffle of feet coming closer to him.
“Yes, and don’t,” he said touching the cold glass, “just don’t come near me right now,” Spike said letting his finger trace a raindrop.
“Spike, I…”
Spike sighed and clenched his jaw, “just go, ok.”
He closed his eyes and didn’t open them again until he heard the door gently shut.
He looked out into the gray morning sky and placed his forehead against the window as he took calming breaths. He had an hour before his flight and it was taking all his strength not to punch his fist into the glass in rage.
“Bloody fucking hell,” he whispered and took a step back. He took another unneeded deep breath and turned around. The packed suitcase on the bed was mocking him as he walked over to it and picked it up.
He looked around the small room one last time and grinded his teeth together, “come on you wanker, stop acting like a poof, you’ve been through worse.” He hissed at himself.
He rolled the tight muscles in his neck and stared at the bedroom door, just a few more minutes of torture and he would be out the front door. A few more minutes and he would be all alone again.
He cursed as he felt a single tear roll down his cheek and roughly brushed it away. He took the few small steps to the door and grabbed the brass handle letting the feel of the cool metal center him.
As he opened the door he could hear the quiet whispers from the hallway stop. He held his suitcase tighter when all three pairs of eyes snapped up to meet his.
“Well, I’m off,” he said as he walked calmly as he could to the stairs. He had just reached the first step when someone gently called his name.
“Spike, will you…”
Spike kept his back turned and waited for the sentence to finish.
“Will you call me when you get there?”
Spike didn’t turn around, he couldn’t. He nodded his head once and began to walk down the steps.
“Spike, please.” He heard behind him and stopped once more clenching his jaw.
“What,” he snapped looking at the front door longingly.
“Will you at least look at me and say good bye.”
Spike wanted to scream, yell at the top of his lungs that he would rather die again then do that but as always he did as the voice commanded. He turned his head and looked into those beautiful hazel eyes that constantly broke his heart.
“Goodbye, Buffy,” he said keeping his voice void of all emotions. He didn’t wait for a reply and quickly moved to the door. He didn’t want to hear it but that didn’t stop it from being said.
And as he ripped open the front door and raced to the De Soto the soft words Buffy said kept ringing in his ear, “Goodbye Spike, I’m Sorry.”
Buffy and he had been together a year, for one year Spike had been happy and in love. That all ended two days ago and Spike wanted to scream at the injustice of it all. He wanted to rant and rave. He wanted to demand answers to why after everything he had done, after every bloody thing he gave up for that girl that she still cheated on him, just like Dru.
No mattered what Spike did, it seemed he was destined to fall for women that cheated on him. A bloody year he had thought he had finally meet a girl that truly loved him but two days ago he learnt how false that assumption was.
Two days ago he saw Buffy and Robin together. Bloody Robin, the wanker that had tried to kill him, shagged his girl.
Spike slammed his foot down on the gas and grinded his teeth.
Buffy had begged his forgiveness but he couldn’t give it. It was the one thing he couldn’t forgive. Buffy knew that as well, she knew what he had been through with Dru. After a long talk with his soul he had decide that simply breaking Robin’s legs was enough and quickly called the only friend he had made in his years as a Scooby.
Giles had instantly agreed to let him move in with him. With the threat of The First over with and the permanent closing of the hell mouth, Spike was no longer needed in Sunnydale and England was the best place for him to regroup.
The Battle with the First had been anti-climatic with a small necklace and the power of Spike’s fought for soul. He had single handedly stopped the threat before anything like Buffy’s plan to make all slayers in training into real Slayers had happened. Spike had walked down to the hellmouth four months ago with a tiny necklace thinking it would be his finally day. Thankfully all that seemed to happen was a large beam came from his chest and destroyed the seal, stopping any and all threats. The best part, Spike felt beside stopping the First and all that rot, was that it caused his skin to become sun proof. He was a day-walker as Xander called him and he bloody loved it. Since then everything had began to slow down and the hellmouth became a strange world of simple normal life.
At first it had given Spike the creeps and made him itch for action but he stayed for Buffy and had begun to slowly like some of the simple things that came with a normal life.
But all that ended when he saw his girl shagging that wanker in the bloody cemetery. Bloody Buffy, can’t even keep a girl by getting a soul, saving the world and becoming sun proof. It was as if Spike was cursed to always fall for the worse type of girls.
‘Bloody well should stick to guys from now on,’ he hissed as he got closer to the airport.
His simple best relationship had been with a man and it had been the only one were Spike had ever really been loved, but like Dru and Buffy, it too had ended badly. As Spike jumped out of his car and stalked into the airport he shrugged off all thoughts of getting into a new relationship. He was better of alone, it was easier on his fragile heart.
Two years later.
“Well,” he asked looking over at the older looking gentlemen to his right, “what do you think?”
Giles picked up each of the six canvases taking a long look at each one carefully. Giles then took a step back and looked at them all for a few moments before smiling and turning to his friend, “there bloody brilliant, Spike.”
Spike grinned from ear to ear, “yeah, worked damn hard on them too,” he said as he placed a fag between his full lips and tilted his head to light it.
“What are you calling them?” Giles asked as he nodded his head at Spike’s pack of fags and thanked him after he was handed one.
“Dead Man’s Sunset,” he said with a wiggle of his brow, making the ex-watcher roll his eyes as he lit his fag.
“I should have guessed,” Giles said as he stepped closer to the one in the middle, “this one is smashing, Spike,” he said pointing to the only one with a shadowed figure lurked in the background.
Each canvas was a breathtaking oil painting of a single sunset. The first being just as it was setting and the last just as the last bits of reds and gold disappeared. Each painting showed the beauty and emotional story that only someone that hadn’t seen a sunset in two hundreds years could re-create.
Each painting had a single tree on a rocky cliff as its only witness to the spectacular view but if you looked careful next to the tree in the third painting you could see a man standing with his back turned to audience. His quite appraisal of the view making the painting speak not in color but in sure emotional content.
Giles was quite literally overcome by the talent and beauty of them.
“How can it be this is the first time you are ever showing me these?” Giles asked as he kept looking at the figure in the middle painting. Giles hadn’t even known his best friend enjoyed art let alone had a talent that was reminiscent of Monet.
“I just finished them, Rupes,” Spike said as he flicked his ash on the tile by his bare feet.
“Yes, but…these are bloody marvelous,” Giles said in awe.
Spike snorted, “don’t sound to shocked there, Watcher,” Spike said his eyes dancing with amusement.
“How can I not, my best friend is a master of color and style when it comes to painting and I am just finding out.”
Spike smiled that the term best friend that was so easily giving and tried to fight back the bloody disgusting blush that colored his vampire face. Even in dead he could kill all of William Pratt’s shy tendencies.
“Thanks Rupes,” he said and moved over to the ashtray to stump out his fag.
“So, who is he?” Giles asked after a few moments of silence. Spike furrowed his brow and looked at Giles expectantly.
Giles pointed to the man in the painting and looked into Spike’s blue eyes, “who is he?” he asked again.
Spike looked at the painting and then back at Giles, “um…no one,” he said looking back at the painting and wondering once again why he kept the shadowy figure in.
“No one,” Giles said raising an eyebrow.
Spike looked at him and gave a huge sigh when Giles just kept staring back waiting for a real answer.
“It’s bloody Angel, alright,” he said flopping down on the huge plush chair a few steps away and running his hands through his short blonde hair.
Giles nodded his head and looked at the painting again, “I thought so,” he whispered as he moved so close that his nose was almost touching the canvas.
“If you bloody knew ten why did you ask, Watcher,” Spike asked grabbing another smoke from his pack on the coffee table and lighting it in frustration.
“I wanted to know for certain,” Giles said as he moved over to the couch across from where Spike was sitting and sat down slowly.
“You want to talk about it,” Giles asked as he took another fag from Spike’s pack and lit it.
“No,” Spike said not looking in Giles’s eyes. Giles was the only human in the world that Spike had told the real story to and since telling him, the watcher brought it up from time to time.
“And if you bring up calling him again, Rupert, I’ll drink your old man blood down to the last drop.”
“Old man,” Giles huffed, “Coming from the vampire four times my age.” He said.
“Oi, at least I still look like I’m in my early twenties,” Spike said wiggling his brow.
“Early thirties, you mean,” Giles said laughing at the affronted face he got for the comment. It was a old joke they constantly played and Giles was glad that it took his dear friend out of the gloomy mood he was about to get into.
As much as Spike liked to pretend it was the other way around, the vampire was in fact the one that brought up Angel about once a day. Since telling Giles six months ago about Angel and his past the blond vampire had found away to bring his sire up when ever he could.
Every week or so after hearing Spike go off day after day, Giles would snap and tell the vampire to call Angel already and talk to him. If nothing else it stopped Spike from speaking the name Angel for a few days, even if Giles knew the vampire would never call.
They sat in silence for few minutes before Spike finally began to speak. “Did I ever tell you about the time me and Angelus when to the opera, it was in 1882…
Giles listened to the story as he his heart broke silently for his sad friend, so desperately lonely and living in the past.
It was Giles fiftieth birthday when he came up with the idea to help his friend out.
He had just finished saying goodbye to the last of the guests that had joined him and Spike for a birthday dinner party. It was as he was closing the front door that the phone had begun ringing.
“Rupert Giles.”
“Rupert, its Angel.”
“…Angel…um, yes, how are you?”
“Good, good…I just called to…um, wish you a happy birthday.”
Giles furrowed his brow and looked at the phone for a moment before placing it back to his ear.
“Well, thank you, Angel…it’s quite unexpected.”
“Um, yes well… Buffy and I talked recently and she told me it was your birthday…and…well, I just thought…
Giles stood there waiting for a few moments feeling extremely awkward as Angel didn’t finish his sentence.
“Yes, well thank you again…um well, if you are ever in England...
“IhearSpikeliveswithyou,” Angel rushed out interrupting Giles awkward attempt to get off the phone.
Giles felt a small smile grace his handsome face, “what was that Angel?” he asked knowing what Angel said but taking great joy in embarrassing the vampire.
“Um…sorry about that. Buffy told me that Spike has been living with you the last two years.”
“Yes, he has been.”
“Um, really…good…”
“Did you want to talk to him, he isn’t here right now. He just went out to get some blood. He always gets hungry after drinking to much wine…”
“No, no it’s ok,” Angel said thankfully interrupting his awkward babble.
“I was just wondering how he was doing,” Angel said after another long pause.
“Aww, well, he’s doing good…in fact he has a gallery opening next week,” Giles said his voice clearly stating how proud he was of his best friend.
“Really?” Angel asked.
“Yes, he is quite talented.”
“I know,” Angel whispered.
Giles nodded and kept quiet looking over at the door when he heard it being unlocked.
“Is all those old farts gone, Rupes?” Spike asked as he threw his keys on the kitchen counter.
“Spike,” Giles heard Angel whisper in something close to awe.
“Who are you talking to? It better be one of those damn Scoobies. I can’t believe not one of them called to wish you a happy birth…
“It’s Angel, Spike,” he said interrupting the ranting vampire.
Spike stopped dead in his tracks and looked at the phone. His eyes showing all his emotions…hope, shock, love, anger, fear, sadness…love.
“Rupert, I better let you go I’ll talk to you later…”
“Don’t you want to talk to Spike,” he asked
“No, no…bye.”
“Angel,” Giles said before he heard the click that indicated that Angel had hung up.
He placed the phone down thinking of what to say to Spike.
“He…he just hung up,” Spike said his voice sounding heartbreakingly sad.
“Um, he had an important call…he had to take.”
“Bollocks, Watcher,” Spike barked pointing to the phone; “He heard my voice and bloody well hung up.”
Giles looked at him helplessly, “Spike, he sounded like he wanted to talk to you.”
“Rupert, don’t bloody lie to me, alright,” Spike said as he began to pace, “what the hell is wrong with me, Watcher? Why the hell do I even try? Everyone I have ever loved has done nothing but bugger with my heart. Bloody hell, I don’t even know why I’m surprised by this. Angel bloody hates me, Dru did nothing but shag me and pretend I was someone else and Buffy cheated on me. It’s all the bloody same shit over and over again and I’m sick of it. Since I have gotten this blasted Soul it’s only gotten worse, the pain has only gotten bloody worse. I am so fucking sick of it, Rupes.”
Giles walked quickly over and stopped his friends pacing by holding him in place by his shoulders, “Spike stop this, nothing is wrong with you, its them, not you.”
Spike snorted and gently pushed away, “Look, I know what you’re doing and I appreciate but just don’t ok. I’m…I’m just going to head to bed.”
“Spike…”
“Rupert, please, just…just say goodnight.”
Giles watched helplessly as his friend walked away.
“Goodnight Spike.” He called out wishing there was something he could do. It was then that it hit him; there was something he could do.
After a good shift drink Giles started his plan with the help of an old…well he wouldn’t call him a friend…but old work collage.
“Wesley Wyndam-Pryce.”
“Wesley, it’s Rupert Giles.”
“Mr. Giles, what a unexpected surprise. Angel mentioned it was your birthday today. May I wish you salutations and…
“Wesley, have a question for you,” Giles asked interrupting the long winded etiquette of English upbringing.
“Yes, of course Mr. Giles.”
“This may sound odd but does Angel ever…well, I know how childish this will sound but does Angel ever talk about Spike?”
“William the Bloody, yes, he has brought him up a few time. May I inquire why you ask?”
“I just…well, as you may know Spike has been living with me the last two years and…
“Yes, I did hear something to that affect, which completely surprised me as in the past you made very vocal objectives in regards to Angel while I was employed in Sunnydale.”
“Yes, well things change, Wesley.”
“That they do, Mr. Giles.”
Giles took a deep breath and got back to why he called, “see the thing is, I was wondering how Angel reacts when he discusses Spike.”
“Aww, well, not any differently then any other vampire he has sired. Why is there a deeper connection between the two then was previously recorded?”
Spike had never told Giles that anything he said was confidential but Giles wasn’t going to chance it, “no, no it’s just Angel acted oddly on the phone and I am worried about it. He doesn’t know how much Spike has changed in the last five years and I don’t want him threatening Spike.”
“Hum, I don’t think Angel would do that.” Wesley answered.
“Well, yes just to be sure, Wesley, you could bring up Spike and see how Angel reacts when he talks about him.”
“Well, seeing as you have always been so helpful in the past, I could do this for you.”
“Thank you, Wesley, that would be classic of you.”
“Very well, Mr. Giles, I shall place it on my artillery today and get back to you tomorrow.”
“Wesley, please be discreet, I don’t want Angel knowing he is being watched this way or he will hide his emotions from you.”
“Of course , Mr. Giles, I’ll use my utmost discretion in this manner.”
“Thank you, Wesley.”
“My pleasure, Mr. Giles.”
---------------------------------------------------------
Angel looked up from his reports as Wes walked into his huge office.
“Hello, Angel,” he said as he sat down on the leather chair across from Angel and smiled at him, “I trust your day hasn’t been too hectic,” he asked.
Angel gave a small smile, “A bit,” he said as he looked back at the stacks of reports in front of him, “is there anything I can help you with, Wes?”
“Um, well yes, in fact,” he said nervously looking down at this click board and then back up to the vampire in front of him, “I, um, well, I was wondering… that is…”
“Wes,” Angel said as he raised an eyebrow, “is everything ok?”
“Yes, of course,” Wes said his voice raising an octave.
“Ok, it’s just your acting all…nervous,” Angel said looking closely at the twitchy ex-watcher.
“What, no, just a little bit too much caffeine, I wager,” Wes said with a nervous laugh.
Angel nodded his head but still kept his brows furrowed, “there was something you wanted to ask me?”
“Oh, yes…I…um, noticed that the files that Wolfram & Hart had on William the Bloody weren’t as in depth as I would like them and I was wondering if I could ask you some questions about him?” Wesley asked trying to keep his voice steady.
“You want to know about Spike?” Angel asked with both his eyebrows shooting up to his hair line.
“Yes, um, if you don’t mind,” Wes said shuffling in his seat.
Angel narrowed his eyes and got out of his office chair, “Hum, I find it odd that yesterday I talked to Giles who is living with Spike, as you are well aware, and today you’re asking question out of no where.” He said as he sat on the edge of his desk and crossed his arms against his chest.
“Um, well…when you told me about Spike living with Mr. Giles I starting doing some digging into our files. That’s when I noticed how appalling the reports were on a famous vampire like the Slayer of Slayers.”
“And that’s all,” Angel asked, “that’s the only reason you’re asking?”
Wes shuffled again and nodded his head, “Yes, Angel that’s the only reason I am asking.”
Angel nodded his head as he looked at the clipboard in Wesley’s hands, “so what was it you wanted to know?”
Wesley smiled and looked over his notes as he pushed his glasses further up his nose, “I was actually wondering about the relationship between Angelus and William the Bloody.”
Wesley noticed the flash of panic in Angel’s eyes
“Our relationship,” Angel squeaked.
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