Chief Wiggium is sitting behind his desk, eating his second box of doughnuts. Suddenly, Homer kicks his door open, dressed like Hugh Jackman from 'Van Helshing'.
HOMER-
"Chief Wiggum, we you looking for a vampire hunter? I, Homer J. Simpson, am your man!"
CHIEF-
"What sort of qualifications do you have?"
HOMER-
"I work for Mr. Burns and I watched 'Glitter' five times....I know evil."
CHIEF-
"Your hired....five times and no brain damage?"
HOMER-
"No, brain no damaged."
That night, Homer is walking through the graveyard with a Super Soaker water rifle. What he doesn't know what Bart and Lisa are sneaking behind him.
LISA-
"Do you think dad knows what he is doing?"
BART-
"You know dad."
LISA-
"That's what I was afraid of." Suddenly, a woman grabs them, and they scream. They look up and see Buffy, Faith, and Kennedy.
BUFFY-
"What are you kids doing here?"
BART-
"Watching our dad kill vampires."
LISA-
"He answered Chief Wiggum's ad."
FAITH-
"Someone answered that dumbass's ad?"
BART-
"Hey...that's Homer."
Homer is still walking through the graveyard. Suddenly, a vampire jumps out and Homer sprays him. He spits out the water, and stares at Homer.
VAMPIRE-
"What the hell are you doing?"
HOMER-
"Hey...why aren't you dying?"
VAMPIRE-
"Dumbass, it's suppose to be filled with holy water, not....yuck!...mineral water." The vampire attacks Homer and he scene ends with him screaming.
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