DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of these characters but they tend to dance in my head--whether I want 'em to or not! Anyway, no infringement is intended-don't sue! I'm just doing what the voices in my head tell me to.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a sequel to my story "Lost Souls". You should read that one first. If you're too lazy you should know that Angel has his soul back, Drusilla has killed Xander, and Buffy turned her into a shish kebob. This picks off where that one left off--about a week later. I wrote another story "Coming Out of the Dark" where Joyce learns the truth about Buffy's extracurricular activities so she knows about it here too.
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Willow Rosenberg placed a fresh flower on the grave. She had been here every night since Xander died. It wasn't getting any easier. She wished she had been able to tell him how much he had meant to her. He was her best friend. All through there lives they had shared everything. Then on Buffy's birthday they'd had that fight and things hadn't been the same since.
Cordelia Chase, holding a carnation in one hand, put a comforting arm around Willow. In the last week they had bonded. A fact which surprised Willow. Cordelia had loved Xander too and now they had become friends.
"I'm sorry, Xand. I miss you." Willow whispered. Cordelia wiped a tear from her cheek.
"He knows, Willow." Willow jumped. She spun around to face the speaker.
"Angel!" Instinctively she reached for the cross in her pocket. Cordelia jumped back and pressed against a large tomb, remembering the time Angel attacked her in the cemetary.
"You don't need that--I won't hurt you." He said indicating the cross
"Sorry. It's habit." Over the months that Angel had reverted to his demonic lifestyle, Willow had come to fear the vampire who had been a friend. It was hard for her to remember that he was not that monster anymore.
Angel looked at the tomb stone and sighed. Poor Xander. He could be such a brat but he didn't deserve this. Angel wanted to curse Drusilla for the pain she had wrought but he knew that by condemning her he was condemning himself too. All he could say was, "I'm sorry." to Willow and Cordelia.
Willow nodded her thanks and was unsure of what to say. "Shouldn't you be with Buffy?" Willow hadn't seen much of the slayer since the night at the school when they'd restored Angel's soul and Xander had died. Buffy was devastated but you'd never know it from the amount of dead vampires in the area. She hadn't been to school since it happened. She slept all day and slayed vampires until the sun came up. Giles was worried, Buffy's mom was worried and from the look of it so was Angel.
"That's why I wanted to talk to you. She won't talk to me Willow. I thought she'd forgiven me. She was so happy when the ritual worked but after Xander--she just went cold."
"She doesn't blame you. She loves you. It's just her way. She fights. It's what she knows best."
"Who knows what best?" It was Buffy, stake in hand. Her hair was unkempt and her clothes were covered with dirt. Willow raised an eyebrow at her friend's appearance.
Cordelia had always teased Buffy about her appearance. Mostly because Buffy was so naturally attractive. Whether she was slaying vamps or having frapacino t the Bronze. Now she looked hollow. Empty. Without life. " Buffy, what have yo been doing, mud wrestling?"
Normally Buffy would have been hurt by that comment but now she couldn't bring herself to care. A friend of hers was dead because she had been to concerned with saving Angel to be doing her job. That would not happen again. She stared at Angel. " I dusted a couple of vamps out by the reservoir. I got dirty." She said evenly.
"Must have been a nasty fight.' he said, trying to get through to her.
"Don't you have people to kill?" She said glaring at him.
"Buffy..." He started.
"I don't want to hear it. You've got five seconds. Leave or else you fit in an ashtray. You decide."
"We don't have to do this."
"Maybe we do."
Willow couldn't believe what she was hearing. Buffy had lost her mind! "Buffy, calm down. Angel didn't-"
"I'm the slayer. He's a vampire."
"But he's Angel, Remember? Angel? Smoochies?" Cordelia was likewise astonished.
"Stay out of this! Don't you guys see? Don't you understand? If I don't kill the him..." She trailed off. All the grief in her that had been building since Angel turned was about to overflow. She slumped to her knees. Angel rushed to her side but she grabbed her stake and thrust it at him "Stay away from me!" She screamed.
"If you want to kill me, do it." He knelt down in front of her arms by his side.
Cordelia glanced from Buffy to Angel. He just stayed there waiting for her to push the stake into his heart.
"Don't you think I'll do it?" Buffy asked him holding the point to his chest.
"You have to do what you have to do." He said compliantly.
Willow wanted to stop Buffy but the crazed look in her eyes scared Willow. She had never seen Buffy look so feral, like a wild animal. She was scared for Angel. "Buffy, listen to me." She moved next to Buffy and put a hand on her shoulder.
"I have to Will. For Xander."
"Xander wouldn't want this. Okay, Xander would want this. But he wouldn't want you to be in anymore pain! You love Angel, if you kill him the only one you're hurting is yourself. Can you live with that?"
Buffy looked at her friend and it was as if she hadn't seen her in a long time. As if she had just woken up from a nightmare. Willow's words made so much sense all of a sudden. The tears that had refused to come since Xander's death now flowed freely.
She looked into the Angel's eyes. So warm and alive. She reached out a shaky hand to touch his cheek "Angel." she cried, dropping her stake to the ground.
He reached out and pulled her to him. Holding her while she sobbed. "C'mon Buffy. I'll take you home. You need some sleep and your mom's worried sick about you.'
She nodded and he helped her up off the ground. Buffy turned to Willow and whispered a quiet "thank you." before walking off with Angel.
"What about me? I helped! " Cordelia whined.
Willow just shook her head and grabbed Cordelia by the elbow. "C'mon Cordelia, you can drive me home." Cordelia remembered the flower in her hand and placed it gently on the ground in front of the stone. "Bye, Xander." she whispered before following Willow to the car.
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