They regrouped in the library, where Willow was apparently trying to explain something to Giles and Ms Calendar.
"It was... well, it was in the key of C, I think. Anyway, there were special effects. Like a music video."
"So Sunnydale is being haunted by Kurt Loder?" wondered Xander.
"He's still alive," Buffy rolled her eyes.
"And he's a news guy, anyway," Willow concurred.
"Might we return to the main issue?" Giles asked, not-too-politely.
"Which is...?"
Well, I don't precisely know," the librarian admitted. "Still, it would seem to have something to do with our revenant. We'll have to wait for Angel to report before we can decide if the Anointed One is involved. Until then-- it would seem that research is called for."
Willow and Calendar exchanged looks; then both dashed for the terminal. Willow beat her by a hair. "You can help Giles." The Englishman promptly bolted for his stacks.
"I'll help you, instead," Calendar decided, and leaned over her student's shoulder.
Buffy sighed. Angel again. Much as she cared for him, she couldn't help but wonder if things wouldn't have been better if they'd never met. She shivered slightly.
BUFFY:
I don't expect my love affairs to last for long;
They're never human. It seems
Sane relationships are dreams.
Living here would give Doctor Laura pause--
The Hellmouth is the cause
Of all that's wrong.
So what happens now?
XANDER & WILLOW:
Another boyfriend and another stake.
BUFFY:
So what happens now?
XANDER & WILLOW:
Another party turns into a wake.
BUFFY:
Where am I going to?
XANDER & WILLOW:
Don't forget, we're in this mess with you.
BUFFY:
Where am I going to?
[She wanders to the window. XANDER idly leafs through a book.]
XANDER:
I've always heard that puppy love will disappear,
That it endures as well
As a snowball in hell.
Living here has got to be the cause of all our sorrow.
Who cares about to-morrow,
Or next year?
So what happens now?
BUFFY & WILLOW:
Another dream, another crash and burn.
XANDER:
So what happens now?
BUFFY & WILLOW:
Another journey takes a nasty turn.
XANDER:
Where am I going to?
BUFFY & WILLOW:
Don't forget, we're in the same boat, too.
XANDER:
Where am I going to?
[XANDER sits down; BUFFY looks out the window. CALENDAR crosses to the stacks to GILES's side. WILLOW is left alone at the computer.]
WILLOW:
I don't imagine anyone will care for me.
I'm not pretty, I know--
At being dull, I'm a pro.
Living here has never been my only aspiration--
So I've lived in imagination
And fantasy.
So what happens now...?
So what happens now...?
Where am I going to...?
Where am I going to...?
ANGEL: [off-stage]
Don't ask anymore....
[WILLOW returns to her work. ANGEL enters the library. GILES and CALENDAR are in the stacks.]
GILES:
I have my work, and nothing more;
But I'm afraid-- what if I fail her?
I have to know her ev'ry move;
Am I an ally or her jailor?
When something strange is going on
I ought to know what the Slayer should do...
CALENDAR:
And when the going gets hard,
There's so much pressure on you....
BUFFY:
I have my work, but I want more!
I hold my own-- or am I failing?
What is the point of being young
When such bad omens are prevailing?
When I look out upon my life
All I can see are so many shut doors.
I have to fight for my life--
I have my work, I want more!
XANDER:
She has her work, but for how long?
She risks her life-- how can that be fair?
And look at Giles-- that could be you!
WILLOW:
I guess it's true-- that could be me there.
ANGEL:
She has us here, we are her friends,
But what to do if something should go wrong?
How long can the centre hold?
She has her work-- for how long?
CALENDAR:
I will pray
Ev'ry day
Rupert may
Find his way.
I will pray
Ev'ry day
He finds his way.
XANDER:
I will pray
Ev'ry day
Buffy may
Find her way.
I will pray
Ev'ry day
She finds her way.
GILES: [BUFFY:]
I have my work, and nothing more, [I have my work, but I want more--]
But I'm afraid-- what if I fail her? [Am I the best-- or just a failure?]
I've got to try-- I must be strong, [And though it seems I can't go on,]
Can't let my weakness harm you...! [I'll do it for all of you...!]
[GILES and CALENDAR move to the balcony, and down the stairs. BUFFY, WILLOW, ANGEL, and XANDER join them.]
GILES & BUFFY: [CALENDAR, ANGEL, XANDER, WILLOW:]
I will pray [I will pray]
Ev'ry day [Ev'ry day]
That I may [That they may]
Find a way [Find a way]
I will pray [I will pray]
Ev'ry day [Ev'ry day]
To find a way. [They'll find their way.]
ALL:
I will pray
Ev'ry day
That we may
Find a way
I will pray
Ev'ry day Love finds a way...!
There was a moment of silence.
"I'm kind of getting used to this," Xander remarked.
"So, uh, Angel," Buffy said, "what's the word?"
"You're not going to like it," he sighed.
"Do we ever?"
"Well, the good news is, I don't think the Anointed One, or any of the vampires, have anything to do with whatever's going. Bad news is, he's sure to try and take advantage of it."
"So, we're in trouble. As usual. Have I mentioned I really hate this school?" Xander wondered.
"Not lately," Willow replied.
Giles said, "It would seem--"
"That research is called for," everyone else in the room, including Angel, chorused.
He looked miffed. "Indeed." He stalked back up the stairs, trailed by Ms Calendar. Willow grabbed Xander's arm and towed him over to the computer.
Buffy faced Angel. "So... books, or binary?"
"Why not look through the newspaper microfiche?"
"Cool. Let's go."
"I'll... be right there." She nodded, and moved over to the large filing cabinet.
ANGEL: [softly]
I dreamed a dream, so long ago,
That I would have someone to hold me.
That dreams were lies, and could not be Was something no-one ever told me....
But the damned ones walk at night
Bringing death within the shadows.
They can tear your world apart
And they turn your hopes to fear.
And all a soul has done for me
Is take the certainties from my life,
And bring a love that cannot be Into a heart that once was empty....
Buffy looked back. "You gonna help, or are you having, like, a flashback?"
He smiled, slightly, and went to her.
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