"What's all this about?", Amy asked. "I didn't cast any more spells, honest!", she declared. "Giles is calling for an all out battening of the hatches.", Buffy answered while dragging the young witch to the Library. "There are some...well, I would say people, but people are usually human...but anyway, there's some...guys he wants you to meet."
The two blondes entered the Library. Oz, Cordelia, Ms. Calander, Willow, Xander, and Giles were seated around two tables pushed together. Pinky and the Brain were on the chalk/eraser shelf of the black board, the Brain pointing to obscure yet intricate drawings with a TV attenna. "What's she doing here?", Buffy asked her Watcher while pointing at Ms. Calander.
"Buffy, please...", Giles began. "We're dealing with a full flegded 'Witch's Revenge'. We'll need all the help we can scrape together just to keep the town standing in one peice, and if we fail the world may be at stake." "The world WILL be at stake, hence our presence.", the Brain corrected. "Naaaaarf.", Pinky let out. "What Pinky?", the Brain asked. The Brain was immediately sorry, as the answer was "I thought we were here because of the catchy slogan-'It's always a sunny day in Sunnydale'." The Brain whacked him with the attenna.
"Listen closely people.", the Brain instructed. "I want this in your heads before it gets dark. We can't afford any casualties due to vampires."
"Actually it already is dark.", Angelus said from the door way. "Can I come in?", the vampire asked. Angelus overly skipped across the threshold. "It seems I can."
"What do you want?", asked Buffy harshly. "Oh...my face on the one dollar bill.", Angelus replied. "A tax form that doesn't have any sentences more than 400 words long. Oh, wait, I got it-a soul... Hahahahahaha!" The vampire doubled over laughing. "But really. You should be more interested in what you want."
"Inform me. What do I want?", Buffy asked, while the people at the table remained silent. "Well, I know what you LIKE.", Angelus replied. "But what you want...rather, need right now is all the help you can get for this 'witch's will' you'll have on your hands in a tomorrow."
"And how do we know you're here for any other reason than to berate Buffy?", Giles asked carefully. "You don't. You'll just have to trust me when I say that I have my reasons. It's not like you don't already h someone who betrayed US-Mr. Giles", Angelus answered. Ms. Calander blushed furiously.
Giles turned to the Brain. "Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?", the Brain asked his Slayer. "I think so Brain, but I don't think catepillars know how to tango.", Pinky replied honestly. The Brain rolled his eyes. "No, I was 'pondering' that Angel would round out the teams that I've envisioned quite nicely."
The Brain rapped his attenna against the blackboard and all the humans turned to him. Angelus walked up to Buffy's chair, and leaned on the back of it, her scent crawling up his nostrils. Pinky evidently found his belly button for the first time, and explored it.
"Tomorrow we're going to be in a battle with our very environment.", the Brain declared. "Every spell ever cast by Amy's mother, Catherine the Great, is going to be manifesting itself differently in varying strengths all over the region defined by Hellmouth for the next 7 days and 7 nights, until her rise from wherever she was trapped on the night of the full moon."
"Hence,", the Brain continued. "I'm dividing you into teams. Amy and Ms. Calander will be our counter casters-attempting to reverse the spells as they come up. I want you based at Ms. Calander's house, sleeping for 4 hours every 4 hours and don't be ashamed to eat whenever you feel like doing so. This will keep you with enough rest to counter any spell at any time.
"Giles, Willow-You're going to be our morning/midday team. You'll get to this library before the sun comes up and serve until school starts. You'll research everything connected with the current events and Catherine herself as well as keeping a running list of casualties."
"Casualties?", Willow gulped. "Yes.", the Brain replied. "Hopefully, we'll get through this with less than a thousand or so dead. Furthermore, I want this Library equiped with every scientific medical remedy practically available. I don't want any healing spells, or any other spells for that matter, cast unwarrantly.
"Oz, Xander-you'll serve as our prime timers. Utilize Oz's gratituous locomotively capable construct/" "What?", Xander asked. "Van.", Oz answered. A look of recognition overcame Xanders confusion. "As I was saying," the Brain said. "I want you patrolling Sunnydale from the end of school until the next team takes over. Especially the Bronze, the Mall, etc. Anywhere there would be large numbers of people.
"That brings me to Buffy and Angel.", said the mouse, in full "I'm genetically altered and can take on/over the world" mode. "If any monsters choose to press there advantage, it will be during the night. You and Angel should be able to thwart their efforts, basing your operation from his apartment."
"Is 'thwart' anything like 'thrust'?", Angelus asked sarcastically. "Because I know she's REAL good at that.", he concluded. Buffy looked daggars at her former love.
The Brain glanced around the table. "What has happened to you humans since we were here last?!", the Brain asked. "Well,", Pinky replied. "Looking at the body language alone...I'd say that Angel has lost his soul after auditioning for 90210 with Buffy, and is now a bad guy who is going to help us for as of now unknown reasons. Oz came into the group as Willow's boy toy, shown by how he sits leaned in toward her and away from the rest of the group. Xander and Cordelia are physically close now, although constantly disgusted with each other- nothing a night over food pellets wouldn't cure though." The Brain's jaw dropped in astonishment as Pinky continued his lecture.
"Now notice how Ms. Calander is looking like a 'Poit' wants to get out of her lips? Well, I think she knew about what would happen to Angel before Angel lost his soul, and is now fretful that she'll never make it up to Mr. Giles. Amy has obviously done something incredibly wrong recently, but has been forgiven as she was affected by it too.", Pinky finished.
"Pinky, what's the square root of one?", the Brain asked him. "Um... lost?", Pinky guessed. "Precisely. There is no way you could have reached a correct conclusion as complicated as the one you proposed.", the Brain admonished. All the hominids shook their heads. "No, that's about right.", they all stated in unison. "But that's nearly a soap opera story line.", the Brain protested. "Yes, I suppose it is.", Giles concured. "Hey maybe we'll become a TV show?", Buffy suggested optimistically. "Nah, we couldn't make it in a WB Tuesday night slot.", Willow said.
"Well, if everyone's dating the person their most angsty with...", the Brain began. "I suggest you all get some rest. Tomorrow will be quite hectic, and that'll just be the beginning."
Nearly everyone left the Library, only Cordelia remained. "And what about me?", she asked Pinky and the Brain. "I mean, I have way more money than any of those people."
"Um...yes.", the Brain responded. "I have...uh, the most important job for you." "We do?", Pinky asked. The Brain grabbed Pinky's snout to keep the younger mouse quiet. "We want you to search for what Catherine is trapped in.", the Brain stated. "If we can destroy that, we'll be able to keep her from escaping."
"How do I find a trapped witch?", Cordelia said. "It's not like I saw one in that last Bloomingdale's catalog...although there was this one sun dress, without a back and it was teal...", she continued until the Brain pointed the attenna in her face. "Search!", he instructed, and pointed to the door. Cordelia swiftly about-faced and marched to the Library's doors. "Man, it's like they had lab experiments done to them.", she spat.
The Brain turned to his own Slayer. "Pinky, the entire world might be turned upside down tomorrow." "AAoouuoo, you mean like one of those Lousiana pinapple cakes.", Pinky surmised. "I love those, especially when I get to rub the brown sugar all into my fur. It's like a mud bath, only granier.", he said. The Brain collapsed his antenna, and hit Pinky on the head with it.
"Can you just make sure to give a message to whoever it's meant for if the phone lines go down?", the Brain asked. Pinky nodded vigourously. "Very well. Come let's plan for tomorrow night.", the Brain told him. "Gee Brain, what are we gonna do tomorrow night?", Pinky asked. "The same thing we do every night we're in Sunnydale. Try to save the world!", the Brain yelled into the empty Library.
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