TEASER
EXT. CAPE KENNETH CEMETERY - NIGHT
Liv walks among the tombstones dressed in her traditional
battle fatigues. She pulls out her pda/cell and punches in a
code.
LIV
(on phone)
Squirrel to Moose. Squirrel to Moose. Come
in Moose.
MAYA
(filtered)
Why are you calling me a moose?
Liv laughs.
LIV
I was trying to reach Mr. Harris. Believe
me, I don't like being the squirrel. What
are you doing there?
MAYA
(filtered)
Research.
A vampire suddenly bursts through the ground half-way.
LIV
Hang on a sec.
Liv tosses a stake through the air directly into the vampire's
chest, dusting him. Liv continues.
LIV
Now would research include sitting alone
with your boyfriend and watching TV?
INT. XANDER'S FIREHOUSE - MAIN ROOM
Maya and Jordy sit on the couch all cozy watching the TV.
TV
(filtered)
Especially important is the warning to avoid
conversations with the demon. We may ask
what is relevant but anything beyond that is
dangerous. He is a liar. The demon is a
liar. He will lie to confuse us.
MAYA
It's still research.
JORDY
Watching "The Exorcist" is research?
LIV
(filtered)
I heard that.
MAYA
Trust me. It's research. Besides we're not
alone.
We pull back to see Pongo sitting on the other side of Maya,
munching on a big bag of popcorn. Technically since Pongo has
no throat, he's throwing popcorn in his mouth, smashing it up
and throwing it everywhere.
MAYA
We have a puppet chaperon.
Liv laughs hysterically over the phone.
MAYA
Sure. Laugh it up while you still...
XANDER(OS)
OWWW!
MAYA
Hang on. I think Mr. Harris has something
for you.
Xander pads down from his apartment looking groggy and in pain.
Maya hands him the phone.
XANDER
Liv?
LIV
(filtered)
Moose?
XANDER
There's four ypoog demons hanging out at the
mauseolum.
LIV
(filtered)
On my way.
Xander collapses onto a chair.
MAYA
You okay Mr. Harris?
XANDER
I'm all right.
A little bit of blood begins to trickle out of Xander's nose.
JORDY
Mr. H?
(points to his own nose)
Nosebleed.
Xander touches his nose and looks at the bloodstained
fingertips.
JORDY
That ever happen before?
Xander grabs his head, screams and collapses to the floor. Maya
and Jordy jump up and rush to his side.
MAYA
Mr. Harris?!
Xander's eye has rolled up in his head. Xander moans in
response.
JORDY
Oh this can't be good.
CUT TO:
EXT. A GRASSY FIELD - DAY
It's a beautiful sunny day. A twisted and gnarled oak tree
stands in the middle of the field. Xander sits up from the
ground and looks around in confusion.
XANDER
Ooooo-kay. Where am I?
FEMALE VOICE (OS)
No where really.
Xander turns to see CASSIE (Episode 7.4, "Help") standing
behind him.
XANDER
I know you. You're...
CASSIE
Cassie. I'm glad you remember.
XANDER
Am I...
CASSIE
No, you're not dead or dying this time. I'm
just here to be your guide.
XANDER
Why not Cordelia?
CASSIE
Thought it might be good to skip the
arguments.
XANDER
Oh you mean because she forgot to tell me
how the visions cause brain damage?
CASSIE
Exactly. Gotta tell ya, don't miss those headaches at
all.
XANDER
Still... when you see her next time, a slap in
the face from me would be nice.
CASSIE
I'll see what I can do. Can we skip to the
chase here?
Cassie waves a copy of Oedipus Rex she has in her hand.
CASSIE
I just got to the part where the Oracle is
refusing to tell Oediputz that he killed his
father and slept with his mother.
XANDER
Well I hate to keep you waiting. Why am I
here?
CASSIE
I have to show you something.
XANDER
What?
CASSIE
This.
Suddenly, day turns into night. What was once a peaceful field
is now dark and eerie. Xander turns and sees a large mob of
people dressed as puritans.
XANDER
What's going on?
CASSIE
Watch.
PREACHER
Those folk with weak stomachs or faint of
heart! This is not the place to be!
Young girls are being tied to large stakes. The girls are
crying and wailing hysterically. Men with burning torches light
the bonfires at the girls' feet.
Xander moves to stop them, Cassie holds him back.
CASSIE
You are only seeing. You cannot help them.
XANDER
Then why am I here?
CASSIE
To witness a horrendous act of humanity.
PREACHER
For the crimes of witchcraft...
Xander turns and sees the preacher's face for the first time.
CALEB
The punishment is is to be burned at the
stake!
Behind Caleb stand the three Consul members in their Red
Cloaks. The girls behind them shriek and cry out in pain as the
fires grows hotter and closer.
INT. CAPE KENNETH MEMORIAL HOSPITAL - HOSPITAL ROOM
Xander jolts out of the bed, looking like a complete mess. An
IV tube is stuck in his arm.
XANDER
(Looking around)
What the...?
LUCY(OS)
Xander?
Lucy rushes to his bedside and hugs him like there's no
tomorrow.
XANDER
Lucy?
LUCY
I thought I'd never see you again.
XANDER
(chuckles)
You act as though you haven't seen me in a
week.
Lucy releases him and gently touches his face.
LUCY
Try two.
XANDER
What?
Lucy hesitates. Xander gets serious.
XANDER
What?
LUCY
You were in a coma for two weeks.
Xander looks at her in disbelief. He looks around towards the
foot of the bed to see:
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - XANDER'S POV
Cassie sits in a chair with her feet up against the end of the
bed. She looks up from the book she's reading (still Oedipus
Rex) and looks at Xander with a benign look.
CASSIE
About time you woke up.
Off Xander's expression we...
GO TO BLACK
END TEASER
ACT I
INT. THE MAUSEOLUM
Drusilla lies on top of a crypt whimpering and moaning. Brad
and The Vizier stand off to the side.
DRUSILLA
Where are they?
BRAD
What did they do to her?
VIZIER
I told you she would be punished.
DRUSILLA
Why do they no longer sing?
BRAD
Who? Who no longer sings?
DRUSILLA
They don't like me anymore.
BRAD
What did they take from her?
VIZIER
Obviously not her mind, because that was
already gone.
Brad strikes the Vizier across the face.
VIZIER
Striking me? Is that your solution to the
problem?
BRAD
Tell me what they did to her.
VIZIER
They took the thing that was most dear.
BRAD
And what was that?
VIZIER
Her precognizance.
BRAD
Her visions?
DRUSILLA
The stars no longer sing and I cannot talk
to the man in the moon.
BRAD
Why is she reacting so badly?
VIZIER
There's only one thing worse than having the
visions.
BRAD
What's that?
VIZIER
Losing them.
INT. CAPE KENNETH HOSPITAL - EXAMINATION ROOM
Xander sits on an examination table trying to keep his gown
from displaying inappropriate body parts. Lucy is giving Xander
an evil glare.
XANDER
What is with these gowns? It's like the
Marquis de Sade designed this.
Lucy continues to give him an evil glare.
XANDER
What?
LUCY
Why didn't you tell me about the headaches?
Or the nosebleeds?
XANDER
I didn't want you to worry.
LUCY
I'm a freakin' nurse! It's my job to take
care of people! To make sure they take care
of themselves! I can't even take care of my
own boyfriend!
XANDER
Well there's just been this looming
apocalypse! I can't just give this up!
LUCY
Why not?!
XANDER
I can't! What'll happen to you? Or to Liv?
I can't do that!
LUCY
Why?!
XANDER
Because I love you! Because I love your
daughter! And if I lose this I can't protect
you or her!
LUCY
Well I love you too, but what good is that
going to do me when you're dead?!
XANDER
You love me?!
LUCY
YES!
XANDER
That's... That's the first time we've said
that.
LUCY
Yes.
Xander stands up and takes Lucy into his arms.
XANDER
I'm sorry.
LUCY
Me too.
XANDER
I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner.
LUCY
Me too.
They hold each other tight.
CASSIE(OS)
Ahhh. How cute!
Xander looks over in the corner to see Cassie sitting in yet
another chair still reading Oedipus Rex.
CASSIE
Sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt.
Xander shakes his head.
LUCY
What?
XANDER
We're not alone.
Lucy looks around and does not see Cassie.
LUCY
Um.. Honey? Are you... ?
CASSIE
She can't see me.
XANDER
I gathered that.
LUCY
What?
XANDER
(sighs)
Apparently I have an invisible spirit guide
helping me today.
CASSIE
That sounds about right.
LUCY
(sighs)
A long time ago, I accepted the fact that we
would never have a normal relationship. So
whoever this invisible person is, please
avert your eyes.
Lucy hugs and plants a big kiss on Xander. Xander gently breaks
off the kiss.
LUCY
What?
Cassie is in the corner with her eyes covered.
CASSIE
Yeah I'm not looking.
XANDER
It's not that it's more of the hospital gown
on with uh... no secrecy thing.
Lucy looks down.
LUCY
Oh.
Lucy giggles.
Dr. Carver enters the room, sees the couple and politely clears
his throat. Lucy and Xander disengage themselves.
DR. CARVER
Hello, Mr. Harris. Lucy.
XANDER
What's up doc?
Dr. Carver and Lucy just look at him.
XANDER
Not feeling the funny today?
DR. CARVER
Mr. Harris, believe me. This is anything but
funny.
Dr. Carver turns on a computer monitor in the room and pulls up
a CAT scan.
DR. CARVER
This is the CAT scan we took of your head
when you came in the ER approximately six
months ago after being mugged.
XANDER
Got to tell you doc, just looks like a bunch
red blobs.
DR. CARVER
That's what it's supposed to look like. But
this...
He changes the display on the monitor. The picture of Xander's
head? Much uglier.
DR. CARVER
This is some majorly bad juju.
XANDER
Is that the medical term?
DR. CARVER
What we are seeing here is a wide spread
neuro-electrical deterioration in the
occipital lobe. These green areas? They're
dead areas of your brain. I've never seen a
case like this happen so fast before. I've
also never seen anyone walking and talking
with this kind of scan.
LUCY
I think I like the other term better.
Cassie leans in and looks at the monitor.
CASSIE
Wow. I wonder if that's what my noggin
looked like toward the end.
XANDER
So... So... how do we fix this?
DR. CARVER
Xander... There's not even a name for what
you have, let alone a cure.
LUCY
Oh god.
DR. CARVER
Look. Let me run some more tests. I can
contact some specialists I know who work out
of the Mayo clinic. Maybe we can figure out
what is going on and come up with a
treatment.
CASSIE
No.
LUCY
That sounds like a good idea.
CASSIE
No. You have to discharge yourself today.
Xander looks at Cassie. Dr. Carver and Lucy look where Xander
is looking and then look at each other in puzzlement.
DR. CARVER
Mr. Harris?
CASSIE
You have to discharge yourself and go to
work. Today.
XANDER
Um..
Lucy sees the look on his face.
LUCY
Oh no. Don't say it.
XANDER
Can I leave today? I... I need to be
someplace.
LUCY
No.
DR. CARVER
Mr. Harris... I really don't think that
someone in your condition...
XANDER
Look... as soon as this is done... I'll be
right back.
Dr. Carver sighs and throws his hands up in the air.
DR. CARVER
This is a really bad idea.
XANDER
But it's my choice.
DR. CARVER
(disappointed)
I'll get the paperwork drawn up.
Dr. Carver leaves. Lucy is trying to keep herself from crying.
LUCY
So is this how it works? I tell you that I
love you and you decide to risk your life
because some invisible person is telling you
to.
XANDER
You know I don't have a choice.
LUCY
You do have a choice!
Xander gently takes Lucy into his arms and she silently cries
into his shoulder.
XANDER
I don't. I'm sorry, but I don't.
LUCY
I know. I just wish...
XANDER
I do too.
CASSIE
I'm sorry Mr. H, but we don't have much
time.
EXT. CONSTRUCTION SITE
Lucy's Jeep pulls up to the site. Xander and Lucy get out and
look over the construction. The site is a muddy mess with signs
of excavation going on, but no one appears to be working.
LUCY
What's this supposed to be?
XANDER
The new municipal building.
LUCY
What are we looking for?
Xander is staring off into the distance.
XANDER
I'm not sure.
EXT. CONSTRUCTION SITE - XANDER'S POV
A group of construction workers are circled around an open
ditch. Behind them is the gnarled oak tree from Xander's
vision.
Cassie stands in front of the workers, looking at Xander.
XANDER
Come on.
Xander and Lucy walk toward the circled workers.
XANDER
Hey guys.
Mr. Banyan turns to see Xander and Lucy. He comes over and
gives Xander a warm slap on the shoulder.
MR. BANYAN
Harris. You're alive.
XANDER
So to speak. What's going on?
MR. BANYAN
Big Problem. Jackasses over at Blue didn't
deliver the trencher, so the boys had to dig
it manually and they found this...
Mr. Banyan gestures to the ditch. Xander and Lucy move forward
an look down to see three skeletons. Charred.
Xander jumps down into the ditch.
MR. BANYAN
Harris! What the hell are you doing?
Xander looks up to see Cassie shaking her head.
CASSIE
We're too late.
XANDER
They were already dead.
MR. BANYAN
What the hell are you talking about?
LUCY
He's... ah... still a little loopy.
MR. BANYAN
He's always loopy.
Cassie shakes her head and walks away. Xander leans over and
touches one of the skeletons. He then grabs his head and
screams in pain.
EXT. THE FIELD - NIGHT
The girls are burning at the stake, screaming. Around each of
their necks are metal crosses strung with cord.
EXT. THE DITCH
Xander recovers and looks around on the bodies. The crosses are
gone.
XANDER
Was anybody else down here?
The construction crew gives non-committal answers.
XANDER
Did anybody take anything?!
The construction crew again grumbles non-committal answers.
Xander looks up at Lucy.
XANDER
This is not good.
ANGLE ON:
A crew member leaving the throng of people surrounding the
ditch. As he walks away his image shimmers and turns into the
Vizier. The Vizier holds up his hand to show the three metal
crosses the girls wore around their necks. He smiles, snaps his
fingers and disappears.
END ACT I
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