Creative Works   

Forgiveness (Part 2)
By ras

Disclaimer: Characters in this story are based on the television series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It is copyrighted by Twenty Century Fox, Warner Brothers, Mutant Enemy and Joss Whedon. No infringement is intended in any part by the author, however, the ideas expressed within this story are copyrighted to the author. I have taken certain creative liberties with the characterization of Buffy.

. . .

Scene 8

Buffy pushed open the library door and stepped in, holding Angel's hand behind her. Everyone immediately looked up from their books at her. The relieved eyes turned to distrust as they saw the figure behind her. Angel felt their penetrating eyes and wanted to flee again, but he knew he couldn't. He just stood their beside Buffy like a puppy who's master had just discovered he had messed on the carpet.

Buffy saw for the first time what Angel had been talking about. She felt the disgust and hatred in the room. Instinctively, she squeezed Angel's hand in an attempt to support him. Buffy knew she wasn't of much help, but she wanted Angel to know that she was there for him. Don't they realize what they're doing to him? How can they look at him like that? It wasn't his fault.

Giles broke the awkward silence. "I take it everything is okay, Buffy?" Buffy felt relieved at this question. At least he wasn't in full attack mode. "Yes, everything fine. We just thought we should do some research on that spell that Amy cast, find out how it works. Just to be on the safe side."

"We're way ahead of you there," Willow responded with a smile. She too was not going to hold Angel guilty for the crimes Angelus committed. Even if he had tried to kill her, her best friend had forgiven Angel, and she meant to do so as well.

"We found this," Jenny said showing Buffy a book.

Buffy became infuriated. "What is she still doing here? I can put up with her as bait, but that's it."

Jenny didn't know what to do, what to say. She had tried to salvage her image in Buffy's eyes by helping restore Angel, but apparently it wasn't enough. It would never be enough.

Amazingly, it was Angel who came to her rescue. "Buffy," he whispered. "Don't do that. Don't blame her for the stuff I did."

"But she could have stopped your change to begin with. She knew, and she didn't warn us. And she lied to us. She pretended to be someone she wasn't."

"Buffy, it wasn't her fault. Enough . . . enough people have already been hurt. I don't blame her . . . it was my fault. I shouldn't have given in . . . I was suppose to have been tortured . . . but I let the pain relax . . . and because of that Angelus got complete control again. It isn't fair for me or you to be angry with Jenny for what I did. Jenny was only doing what she thought was right for her people. She didn't mean to deceive any of us."

Buffy wanted to tell him how wrong he was. How it hadn't been his fault, but she knew she couldn't convince him.

Jenny Calendar was stunned. If anyone should have hated her, it should have been Angel. Buffy is so right in hating me. I could have stopped it before it started. But instead, I lied to them, I put everyone in danger, and I let my people down. This is my fault. And still Angel is forgiving me, standing up for me. We really can trust him . . . as long as this spell continues to work.

Buffy decided to go with Angel's wishes. Ms. Calendar was one of the Romani who had tortured Angel for so many years. Angel was the one who had his soul ripped away from him because of Jenny's negligence. If Angel was willing to forgive her, then Buffy thought she should be too. Besides, she thought, now that I have my Angel back, it doesn't really matter.

"Angel's right. I'm sorry, Ms. Calendar. It wasn't your fault and I have treated you unfairly. Forgive me for being so mean?" Those words were so hard for Buffy to say, but she could do it for Angel.

Jenny didn't know what to think. Now Buffy was asking for her forgiveness?? She was speechless. All she could manage was a nod.

"What happened to your arm? That is so disgusting?" Xander asking with his remarkable talent of bad timing.

Buffy replied for Angel, knowing it would be too difficult for him to explain. "It's nothing. Just a little accident."

"Well," Willow tried to change the topic, "maybe we should do some more research on the spell now."

The occupants of the library returned to their opened books and began working again. Angel glanced around the room and couldn't believe that all of these people were working late into the night to help him, after all that he had done. He was so relieved that they weren't going to hate him for what happened, but he still felt guilty by the sheer thought of them being so kind to him. He really wanted to get out of there.

"Anyway, Buffy, " Ms. Calendar began again, "here's what little information we could find. It appears to be a very powerful spell, I don't think we have to worry about it just wearing off. As for any other restrictions, I'm not sure yet."

Buffy nodded. "What can I do to help?" she asked.

Jenny handed her a book of her own to go through. Dragging Angel along by the hand, Buffy sat herself down at another table to begin reading. Angel knew that Buffy wanted him to stay with her, but he really needed to get out of this still awkward situation. He needed air, and time to think.

"Buffy, would it be okay if I went home for a while? I appreciate all of the hard work you guys are doing to help, but I just need to rest. I still don't feel quite right yet."

"Okay," Buffy said reluctantly. Then she hugged him and getting her lips close to his ear whispered, "No more destructive stuff, okay? I don't want to have to worry about you."

Angel nodded and immediately left. He really just had this urge to bolt to his loft and brood for days. Habit, he figured.

. . .

Scene 9

Angel opened the outside school door and was swept away in the cool night air. That library was so tense, even though everyone had been so forgiving, there was still this feeling he got from them . . . fear.

As Angel started to walk away a figure came up from behind him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "What did you get me???"

Angel's heart sank. "Dru"

"Well, where's my present?" the insane vampire asked with a face of delightful anticipation.

Angel thought to himself, What should I do? She's pretty strong now, it would be a pretty big risk to tell her that I've changed back. She's just crazy enough to do something really dangerous. And it might be helpful if she and Spike still think I'm on their side . . . But, I don't think . . . I can't handle pretending to be Angelus, even for a few minutes. I have to though, I have to . . . for Buffy.

"Dru, honey. I had a few problems. I promise I'll bring you the Slayer's heart next time."

"No present!" Dru pouted, playing with his collar. "Well then go get me something good. I want something young."

"Okay, go back to the warehouse and I'll bring you the juiciest young thing you've ever tasted." Angel's tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth, but he was able to suppress the flood of vomit threatening to explode.

Dru smiled; Angel's trick was working. She leaned her body forward and, before Angel knew what was happening, kissed him. Angel remembered Angelus doing . . . things with Dru to make Spike jealous. He felt extremely nauseous again, but had to keep his cool. He forced himself to kiss her back; he couldn't risk making her suspicious. "Go on, I'll go get your new toy," he said, pulling away. Dru walked slowly away, staring at Angel with a smile the entire time. She winked and then the night wrapped her in darkness and she was seen no more. Unbeknownst to both vampires, there were two sets of eyes watching them.

. . .

Scene 10

Xander stood at the snack machine in shock. That was Angel and that was Dru and that was them kissing. CRASH! Xander dropped the coke he held in his hand and was startled back into reality when it landed on the floor. Sure he didn't trust Angel, never had. He'd even go so far as to say he hated the monster. Still, for him to be having an affair with Dru. That was too much. Well, Xander thought, I have to tell Buffy.

Back in the library everyone was still pouring over the ancient books. Buffy was so happy to have her Angel back; she didn't mind the actual research work involved.

"Uhhh Buffy, can I talk to you a minute? It's uh important." Xander asked trying to be tactful. No matter how much he hated Angel, Xander loved Buffy and didn't want to see her hurt. This was going to be difficult.

"Sure Xander. What's up?" Buffy's sheer joy showed in her voice.

Xander hated doing this, but it needed to be done. "Are you sure the spell with Angel worked? I mean positive?"

"I'm sure Xander, he is his old guilt-ridden self. I'm positive."

"Well then normal guilt ridden Angel was just having smoochie fest with Druscilla," Xander blurted out. Okay, so tact wasn't his strong suit.

"Not funny, Xander."

"Buffy, I'm way serious. I hate that I had to tell you this, but . . ."

"He was . . . he was kissing her?" Buffy couldn't believe him, it couldn't be true.

"I'm sorry Buffy."

Buffy stared off into nowhere. She was sure Angel was not Angelus anymore, he had been so devastated before. Maybe the spell was weakening, maybe something went wrong. Buffy couldn't stand the thoughts anymore. Her defense mechanisms automatically kicked in. "Yeah, well so am I. I know you're jealous of Angel, but this is too far. He just got his soul back, how could you make up something like this?"

"I'm not making it up, Buffy" Xander was crushed because she didn't believe him. Did she really think he was sadistic enough to lie about something like this? "Fine," Buffy said grabbing the book she was reading, "I'm leaving and going to be with Angel. Thanks for not helping." With this angry outburst Buffy stormed out of the library, crying. How could Xander say that to her . . . unless it was true, but it couldn't be, Buffy wouldn't believe it. I trust Angel, that's all there is to it. She sat down in the hallway and started to cry.

. . .

Scene 11

In the warehouse that served as Spike and Dru's layer, a very angry vampire was throwing a fit. "What do you mean he was kissing her?" Spike screamed as he threw a chair.

The lowly underling vampire ducked out of the way as the chair shattered. "I saw them outside of the school kissing. I'm sure, sir."

"I knew he wanted her. Wanted what was mine, but I didn't think that Dru would cheat on me. After how long I took care of her!" Spike threw a few more items up against the wall. "How could she? "

"Well, if Angelus wants what is mine, then I guess that I will just have to take what is his. That will teach the bloody bloke; he doesn't mess with me."

"Sir?"

"Gather up the men. You're going to catch us a Slayer."

"But how??"

"Don't kill her, you idiot. Use your head for once. Find out where she is, stake her out. Then, net her," Spike said handing the other vampire a large net. The other vampire grinned, he could handle this, and just think of the fame he could obtain for being the one who caught the Slayer.

. . .

Scene 12

Buffy pulled herself back into reality. She didn't know how long she had been sitting there, she didn't care. She didn't care about anything. Xander had been lying about Angel, she was sure. At least she wanted to be sure. How could she be restarting her relationship with Angel if she didn't trust him? That's it, Buffy decided, I'm going to go talk to Angel about this right now. Then he can tell me how this has all been a big mix up, I'm sure he will. Okay so maybe she wasn't sure, but she was going to confront him about it. She had learned to be straight forward with Angel after not asking him about Druscilla when she first saw them together. Angel would always give her an honest answer, no matter how painful the truth was, if he knew she loved him. And she did!

Buffy stood up and walked out of the building, still in a daze from her crying fit. The world just seemed this swirl of things around her. Nothing was real except her and Angel. It was because of this that she didn't notice the vampires on the roof as she opened the door or see the vampire in front of her until the net was already on her head. Once she realized what was going on she fought as best she could, but the net was already on her and the vampires were all around her. She kicked and scratched, but to no avail. There were just too many of them, and they had her trapped.

"Spike is going to love this," the vampire laughed. This truly was too easy. He had hoped to trap her, but he couldn't believe it was this easy. Something had to be wrong with the Slayer, but it didn't really matter to him. He had the girl. He and the other vampires dragged the net and Slayer towards the warehouse for whatever fate Spike had in mind for her.

. . .

Scene 13

The next morning at school Willow and Xander sat in geometry class. Buffy was late, okay she wasn't there, but they were sure she was going to show. Buffy had left kinda angry last night, but they were sure she was fine.

It wasn't until the end of the day when Buffy still wasn't there that they began to truly worry. So maybe Buffy would skip a couple of classes, okay maybe all of her classes; but she wouldn't miss finding out what they had dug up on Angel's spell.

"Maybe she just stayed at Angel's. They might need some reunion time," Willow tried.

"Or maybe he killed her or turned her over to his buddy, Druscilla," Xander ranted with anxiety in his voice.

"Let's not jump to conclusions here, I'm sure Buffy's fine. I'll just call her home and see how she's doing," Giles said in a calm tone. He was concerned that perhaps the spell hadn't worked; that Buffy had been wrong about Angel, but worrying too soon wasn't going to do any good. Giles picked up the phone and dialed the number; no answer. Now was the time to worry.

"You see, she's dead, he killed her. Or he's got her tied up in his apartment. That's it; I'm going after him," Xander said in haste as he headed for the door.

"What do you plan on doing, Xander?" Giles asked, hoping to prevent the boy from placing himself in danger. "Remember Angelus is a very dangerous vampire. He's too much for you to handle."

Xander whirled around, "I know. But if he has Buffy, I have to save her. I'm not letting him hurt her anymore. Buffy's my friend and that's all there is to it." Xander slammed the door open and left in a rush.

"Xander!" Willow trailed after him, "I'm coming with you." She grabbed a small bag of Buffy's weapons as she ran to catch him.

"I'll, I'll stay here and wait in case she does show, and keep researching this spell," Giles said, but it didn't really matter they were already half-way down the hallway.

It only took them minutes to arrive at Angel's apartment. Xander started to break down the door, but Willow stopped him. "What are you going to do Xander?"

"Well, uhh, I was going to break down the door, and then I was gonna, uhhh, I don't know, rip his heart out."

Willow handed him a stake, "Were you planning on using one of these?"

"Oh, yeah I guess that kinda would be important." Xander didn't really care about a plan, he was going to kill him Angel and save Buffy. Yeah he knew that Angel would probably take him out in minutes, but he had to try and save Buffy. His endorphines out weighed his reasoning.

"Don't you think we should knock first? I mean if Buffy is in there . . ." Before he tried to break down the door again, Willow knocked.

"Oh that's good Willow. Warn the evil vampire that we're coming. Maybe he'll offer us a coke before he fights us."

Willow just gave him a look.

Inside the apartment, Angel was awaken by the sound of someone outside his door. His apartment was still a wreck from his fury the night before. He had come in from the library and thrown a bit of another fit. Okay it was a major fit. Knowing that Buffy was so forgiving only made his guilt worse. In all his years of brooding he had never been faced with guilt like this before. The knock was probably Buffy, coming to see if he was all right after she got out of school. He really didn't want her to see him like this, again. "uhhh, come in."

"See," Willow said. "Angel's just going to be normal and tell us where Buffy is. No fighting involved." She opened the door and stepped in. The disastrous state of the room concerned Willow. Maybe Buffy had tried to fight Angel here. The room definitely looked like someone had been fighting in there. In any case, she was glad to have a large wooden cross in her hand.

"Willow? Xander?" Angel asked, confused. He was still kinda out of it from just waking up. Then he saw the weapons in their hands and that . . . look again. He closed his eyes in pain. Angel knew they had come to kill him. Why didn't they do this last night? Why wait until now? They must not have wanted to kill me in front of Buffy, too traumatic for her. It's . . . it's probably for the best, Angel. You deserve to die for what you've done. I won't . . . I won't fight them. I'll just let death come, let Xander plunge the stake through my heart. Angel knew it would hurt, but not as much as his heart ached now.

Xander exhibited his normal lack of any control, "What did you do with her? Where is she?" he screamed slamming Angel up against a wall.

Angel was confused, Where's who? Buffy, he's talking about Buffy. What's happened to Buffy? With renewed strength Angel loosened Xander's grip on him. "Buffy's missing?"

"Don't play games with me man, what'd ya do to her?"

"I . . . I haven't seen her since last night, when I left the library. She didn't go to school today?"

Xander had heard enough, he didn't need this lying jerk around. It was staking time.

"Xander wait!" Willow screamed, "maybe Angel's telling the truth." Then Willow turned to Angel. "No one has heard from her since she left to go to you last night. Do you have any idea what could have happened to her?"

"Last night, she was coming here? Oh God," Angel said bringing his hand to to his face. Xander let him go and Angel slumped onto his bed and buried his face in his hands. "Dru . . . Dru must have seen her coming here."

"So you admit to it. How could you cheat on Buffy with Druscilla?" Xander yelled accusations.

"Angel, I don't understand. What about Druscilla?" Willow was attempting to remain rational throughout this entire situation. She desperately tried to make sense of it all.

"Oh, never mind, it doesn't matter now. Druscilla was . . . she thought I was going to bring her something. When I didn't show . . . she must have come looking for me again and found Buffy. It's . . . it's my fault. I shouldn't have left her alone, I should have warned her about Dru . . .I should have . . ." Tears rolled down Angel's eyes. Buffy had been so concerned about him, but he had left her. He hadn't been there to protect her when she needed him, and now Druscilla had her.

"Let me try and get this straight. You think that Buffy left for your apartment, Dru accidentally bumped into her, and kidnapped her. But wouldn't Buffy have been able to easily fight off Druscilla?"

"Not if she was upset, and not paying any attention," Angel said, starring at the floor.

"She was crying and was a tad hysterical when she ran out."

"It's my fault again. I made her cry, I made her run without paying attention. It was my fault Dru was there and it was my fault Buffy wasn't ready for her. Now Druscilla is going to kill Buffy . . . and it's all my fault. It's all my fault!" Angel muttered to himself.

"You're fake tears aren't doing you any good! I can see right through you. You promised Buffy to Druscilla. You know she has her don't you?" Xander yelled.

Willow had heard enough of this. Xander was so jealous that all he wanted to do was kill Angel and Angel was so guilt ridden all he wanted was to torture himself. "That's enough! Out of both of you. Do you think that sitting around here moping and whining is going to help Buffy? That, that crying about how it's your fault is going to save her? And you, is killing her boyfriend going to get her away from Druscilla? You two are acting like five-year olds fighting over your playdo. Pull it together, we have to do something to help Buffy!"

Both guys turned and stared at Willow's uncharacteristic outburst. Xander realized that Willow was right. No matter how much he hated Angel, if Druscilla was the one with Buffy, then maybe Angel could be of help.

Angel, too, came out of his brooding spell and saw the reality of the situation. He had to save Buffy from Druscilla. Only he would be able to convince Druscilla to give up her new toy. Angel wanted to remain in his cave of self-pity forever, but that just wasn't an option anymore. His life was no longer just his; it involved Buffy. Everything he did affected her. Only now did Angel truly realize the impact that would have on his life.

"You're right," Xander said. Angel nodded. "Let's go!"

"Wait a minute Mr. Gung Ho, we need a plan," Willow said. "What do you think we should do?"

"Well, I was going to uhhhh go there and stake the vampires and then save Buffy," Xander responded.

"Brilliant Xander, you'd let the vampires catch us all," Willow replied sarcastically.

"No, we can't go in there on the attack. Dru's expecting me to bring her a present, so I'll come in bringing her one. Then I have to convince her that she's the only one for me and that she doesn't need to hurt Buffy," Angel said, the plan emerging as he went along. He didn't like it. It meant pretending to be Angelus again, and this time in front of Buffy. This would be torturous for him, but even more so on her. Would she doubt him, would she too believe the ruse? If there was anyway around doing this, Angel would have jumped at the chance, but there just wasn't one. It had to be done, no matter how it would affect his relationship with Buffy.

"Where do you plan on getting a present?" Willow asked.

Angel looked at Xander and Willow with a certain look, a look Xander had seen before. "Oh, no! No way are you getting anywhere close to my neck. Remember what happened the last time you tried that. I was almost Spike food. What do you plan on doing if they decide to eat us or if they aren't willing to give Buffy up?"

"You're, you're right," Angel said dejectedly. He was of no help to Buffy; who was he kidding? Angel summoned all his strength to concentrate on saving Buffy and not going into another brooding fit. "We need a contingency plan. Especially if Dru's had one of her premonitions. Still we need a way to get in the door, then attack and rescue Buffy, so they aren't expecting it."

"Premonitions?" Xander asked.

"Druscilla is . . . psychic to some degree. Sometimes she can sense things like this." Angel attempted to explain.

"Great! Now an insane vampire has our friend and she's psychic. Could this situation possibly get any worse? What if the person trying to help us was an evil vampire himself. Oh wait, guess we're doing that too." Xander's joke was not well received.

"Well, Angel," Willow said in a shy, quiet voice. "You could use me as the present, and then Xander could wait until things got ugly and take them by surprise. I mean I trust you . . . and we've had practice with you trying to bite my neck."

Angel's head swirled with those words, "I trust you." He couldn't believe Willow had said that. Why would she trust me? Why? I don't even trust myself. After I tried to kill her and . . . Then Angel heard the rest of the sentence. That burned, badly. He knew she meant it jokingly, but it still hurt. For an instant he had thought that maybe she had forgotten what he had done, maybe even that it hadn't been real at all. Her small joke reminded him of everything he had done, and everything that the demon inside him had the capacity to do, even now.

"No way am I letting vampire boy use you as a present, Will. I still don't trust him," Xander said angrily. He didn't trust Angel and was not about to let his best friend put her life at risk.

"Xander, remember what's important here: Buffy!!!" Willow cried out in an exasperated tone. "I'll be fine, and you'll be there to rescue us all."

Xander liked that idea. Saving Willow and Buffy from Angel and all the bad vamps; he'd be the hero of the day, and Buffy would have to see how manly he was. So he agreed, reluctantly. "Fine, you're right again. But if we're going in there I'm going to need more weapons than this."

"I can take care of that," Angel said, pulling a wooden box from under his bed. Guess finding this box last night was a good thing after all, Angel thought to himself. "Take what you need."

"You keep vampire killing equipment around under your bed?" Xander asked.

Angel shrugged. "Oh, and there's this," he said as he reached for the opened bottle of Holy Water sitting on the table.

Something clicked in Willow's brain, "That's how you hurt your arm? Wow!"

Xander gave Willow the don't-fall-for-his-tricks look and grabbed all the supplies he needed.

Angel used a cloth to reach in and pull out a large wooden cross. Handing it to Willow he said, "Here, stuff it inside your shirt just in case." He put on a jacket and slid a stake up his sleeve, just in case.

The three left Angel's apartment ready to do whatever it took to save Buffy, whatever it took.

. . .

Scene 14

"Where the hell is he?" Spike screamed as he wheeled across the floor of the warehouse. "Why has he been gone so long? How long does it take to get a young girl and bring her back here?"

Buffy was still tied up in the net. One of the vampires held a gun to her head to make sure she didn't try anything. Things didn't look so good for Buffy. Still in her heart, she just knew that Angel would come save her. She didn't care what Xander had said or about anything else. Deep inside Buffy knew her Angel would always rescue her, always.

Druscilla walked up beside him and ran her hand along his shoulders. "Shh darling. Can't I just open her without him? Please, for me."

Spike cringed away from her touch. No matter how much he loved Dru, she wasn't his anymore. Angelus had taken her from him. He had lost his strength, his self-respect, and now his love. All that was left now was revenge. Maybe when Angelus was destroyed right in front of her, Dru would come back to him, truly love him again, only him. But for now, he wasn't taking the leftovers like a mutt.

"She's for you and Angel both. We're waiting on him."

Dru started to cry her little whine. She didn't understand why Spike was being so mean to her. Just yesterday both Spike and Angel were fighting over her, now Angel was no where to be found and Spike was being so cruel to her.

Seeing her like that loosened Spike's heart. No matter how angry he was at her and Angelus, he still loved Dru. He couldn't stand to see her upset. He was about to call off the whole thing. Besides letting Dru kill the Slayer would still have a pretty big impact on Angelus, he would loose his new obsession.

His decision didn't really matter, because at that exact moment Angel tromped in with Willow flung over his shoulder.

"Hey honey, I'm home! And look at the great present I've brought you, one slayette," Angelus said with a grin, standing Willow on the ground. Both played their part very well. Willow acted terrified, which wasn't too difficult considering there were several very evil vampires around and one of them had a gun to her best friend's head. The hard part was Angel's. It was impossible for him to pretend to be that monster again. It would tear his heart out even more to pretend to be in love with Dru and not care about Buffy. Every moment he had to pretend to be that . . . thing again made it worse, brought back more memories of the evil he had done.

Buffy stared at Angel. Could it be? Could she have been wrong about his change? There he was presenting her best friend as a present to Dru. She wanted to cry; it couldn't be. There had to be another explanation.

"Angel, Spike brought us a present as well," Dru said ecstatically.

Angel turned and looked at Buffy, pretending to just notice her. Seeing her in the net, with a gun to her head, killed Angel. This was his fault, and he knew it. If only he had stayed with her last night, then . . . It was too late for that.

Angel's eyes gave him away. Buffy could tell it was just an act and that doing this, seeing her like this, having to act like this way was torturing him. Buffy had to force herself not to smile, because she knew she would be out of there in minutes. Angel had come to her rescue, just like she knew he would.

Then it hit him. Dru had just said that Spike brought??? Spike had taken Buffy not Druscilla? But how? Why? That didn't matter, but this completely changed how he was going to attack this situation. "Care to explain to me what you're doing with my girlfriend, Spike?"

Spike wheeled himself over to where Buffy sat and removed the net from her. Buffy would have just punched him and ran, but there was still the gun to her head, cocked and ready to fire. She could have kicked that away, but then what about Willow and Angel. Buffy decided it was best to let Angel and Willow follow through with their plan.

"Maybe you'd care to explain what you were doing with mine," Spike blurted out as he grabbed Buffy by the hair.

"What are you talking about? You're beginning to sound as crazy as Dru." Angel didn't know what to do. Somehow Spike must have found out about him and Druscilla, he hadn't counted on that.

"Spike baby, what are you talking about. I thought Angel and I got to play with her. What's going on?" Druscilla asked, still completely unaware of the situation. She was just as loony as ever.

That's when Angel knew what to do. He let go of Willow and stepped over to Dru, pulling the female vampire into him from behind. He whipped out the stake he had stashed up his sleeve and put it straight to Druscilla's heart. "Let her go Spike." Angel yelled, turning into vamp form.

"You won't kill her, you're in love with her and I know it." Spike snarled digging into Buffy's neck with his fangs. The blood dripped out, but Spike didn't drink. He was waiting to see Angel's response.

"That's where you're wrong Spike, in any case, is that a risk you're willing to take?"

Spike didn't know what to do. He was furious with Dru, but seeing Angel hold a stake to her drove him crazy. His protective reflexes took over. He pulled his face away from the now unconscious girl. "It seems we have ourselves a dilemma here. Either we both kill them or we both let them go, but then who let's go first? I'm afraid we have a rather unsolvable situation," Spike said stalling for time in order to devise a plan of his own.

"Sorry, wrong on that part too, Spike," Xander said, leaping from behind some boxes and throwing the remainder of the Holy Water in Spike's face. Spike screamed and tried to protect his face with his hands while Xander grabbed Buffy and ran. Angel and Willow were right behind; four friends running from the evil and danger.

Once they had reached a safe distance from the building, Xander turned to Angel and said, "I'll take her home and take care of her wound. She didn't loose that much blood, so she should be all right. I think it's best you stay away from her for a while. You've caused her enough damage."

Angel stared at the innocent Buffy flung over Xander's shoulder. His own fears and doubts made him listen to Xander. Not only had the demon inside him hurt Buffy, but he had done it himself, again. If he had warned Buffy or stayed with her, none of this would have happened. If he had gone back to the warehouse sooner, there were so many what ifs, but they didn't matter. Buffy was hurt, bleeding, because of his carelessness. Xander was right, he was just causing Buffy more and more harm. It was best if he just stayed away.

. . .

Scene 15

Buffy Summers lay sound asleep in her bed, having a wonderful dream about Angel. Right when Buffy got to the part in her fantasy where she and Angel kissed, she awoke with a start. She got her bearing in the room again and then smiled at the window.

Outside sat Angel, staring in at her. When he saw Buffy notice him, he turned and started to leave, but Buffy ran to the window.

"Angel, wait!"

Angel knew he shouldn't have come, but he couldn't stay away. He told himself that he should just leave right now without looking back, but he couldn't do that either. He turned around to see her sweet face and couldn't help but smile back. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I shouldn't be here, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, your neck and all."

"I'm fine. Spike didn't drink any I guess," Buffy said putting her hand to the bandage across her neck. There was a long pause where Angel just stared at Buffy and vice versa. The love between the two couldn't be stopped; it resonated back and forth through the distance between them. Buffy broke the silence, "Aren't you going to . . ."

"Don't say it," Angel cut her off.

"What? Why?" Buffy had forgotten casting the spell to uninvite Angel.

"I can't come in now, and it's better that way . . . safer. If something were to happen, it's better if I can't get to you, so I can't hurt you like last time."

"Don't be ridiculous, Angel" Buffy then realized the full amount of pain Angel was going through. Sure they had talked about this in Angel's apartment, but he was still feeling the same things. This wasn't going to be over with as easily as she had hoped. Angel was torn up over what he had done, and it was going to take time to fix that. Buffy stuck her hand out the window and turned Angel's face towards her. Angel looked down, ashamed. "Stop blaming yourself for what happened."

"I can't, Buffy. Every time I see you I think of what I've done. And when I'm not with you . . . I see it even worse. All I can think of is how much I've hurt you."

Buffy nodded, trying to understand. At least he was talking about his feelings and not keeping it all bottled up inside, as he had a tendency to do. She decided to try a slightly different approach. She grabbed Angel's hand, "Come in! Come in! Come in! Oops, well I've said it now. Damage done, so you might as well come in."

Angel glared at Buffy, he couldn't believe she had just done that. He knew coming in would just encourage her, but she looked so cute when she was being stubborn and assertive. Angel allowed Buffy to pull him in the window.

Once inside Buffy gave Angel a great big hug and just held him, unwilling to ever let go. It was all she could think of to do to help ease his pain. Buffy pretended that somehow her embrace could absorb the pain right out of Angel and into her. "It's okay, Angel. It's going to be okay."

Angel felt her warm embrace and his pain seemed to melt away, but he wouldn't let it. He pushed her away. "Buffy, I want to explain to you about Dru and what you saw."

Buffy put her finger to Angel's lips, "Shhh," she said, "I don't care. you don't have to explain anything to me."

"What?"

"I trust you, Angel. I knew from the beginning that you didn't have anything going on with Dru. I knew when you walked in there that you were there to save me. And I know now that there is absolutely nothing that could keep us apart."

Angel was speechless. Buffy's trust and devotion astounded him, especially after everything that had so recently occurred. It hadn't been too long ago that Buffy had been demanding to know every detail about Druscilla. Buffy had said she didn't trust him, and now she was acting like this. Their relationship had truly grown stronger in the face of all the adversity.

"Sit down," Buffy commanded.

Angel was perplexed, yet obeyed. He was still in awe of what was going on. Buffy climbed on the bed behind him, wrapped her legs around his body, and massaged his shoulders and back. "You are going to relax, Mr. serious and brooding" Buffy said with a grin. Angel deserved a break. Buffy's tone changed to a more solemn one. "I know it's hard, Angel, but it will be easier if you let me in . . . let me help. We're stronger together, and I know we can make it through this. It isn't going to be easy, but we can do it, together."

Angel nodded and allowed Buffy to knead and caress him. Maybe she was right, maybe talking to Buffy about it would help. But where could he start, how could he make her understand what he was going through? "I want . . . I wish I could explain it to you, so that you could understand how I feel, Buffy." Angel couldn't look her in the eye, he just stared at her bed, trying to formulate words to explain his thoughts.

"Why don't you try. I know I can never feel what you do, but talking about it is important. I want to try to understand."

Angel nodded. He really didn't want to do this, yet he knew he needed to. His throat tightened, and Angel feared his voice would fail him. Getting these words out was going to be next to impossible. "Sometimes I'm just sitting there . . . thinking . . . and then I see a flash of something I did . . . something I said to you." Angel paused, he couldn't make the words make sense. He wanted her to understand, but it just couldn't be put into words. "I just, I want to punish myself for it, I want to rip my own heart out. And then I think of you and how sweet you're being, and it hurts worse, because I don't deserve you." There, he had said it. But then he was immediately ashamed and embarrassed for saying it. How would Buffy respond to that?

Buffy sat listening, trying to comprehend what Angel was going through. Just then the phone rang. "Urgghh, whoever it is is going to get an ear full," Buffy complained, not wanting to give up her solace with Angel. Still she picked up the receiver and gave a begrudged, "Hello."

"Hey Giles, yeah I'm fine"

"The Spell?"

"Uh huh, you're sure."

"But what about . . .?"

"Not even . . . are you sure?"

"Yeah I'll tell him."

"Bye"

Buffy hung up the phone and turned to Angel. "Angel," she began in a solemn tone, "I have bad news."

Angel pursed his lips and prepared himself for the worse. He knew this spell thing had been too good to be true, that this moment would be short lived. He had been preparing himself all along for the fact that he would eventually turn again, but he didn't want to hear it from Buffy's lips.

"I'm sorry to inform you that you are going to have to put up with a lot more of this, and some of this," Buffy said kissing Angel, "because Giles just told me that he is 110% positive that the spell is unbreakable under every and all circumstances."

"All circumstances?" Angel asked with a look of disbelief. Was it possible? Could he truly be happy without fearing the consequences?

"Uh huh" smiled and hugged him wildly. This was her best dream come true.

"So I can . . . have happy feelings, and feel . . . human without . . . " Angel couldn't believe it. He was in shock.

Buffy grinned overjoyed. Nothing in the world could break this mood. Nothing could tear her and Angel apart any more. She pulled him towards the window. "Do you see that star?"

"Which one?" Angel asked, putting his arm around her.

"That one."

Angel nodded.

"I do believe it is your lucky star. And since I know so much about astronomy," Buffy smiled jokingly, "I'm going to read your fortune in the stars."

Angel had to laugh. "What do they say?"

"They say you will live a very happy life with your girlfriend." "Ewwww does it say who she is?" Angel teased. Hearing this news had pulled him out of his normal brooding mood and into a more playful one. The full implications hadn't quite sunk in yet, but Angel was ecstatic nonetheless.

"Cute," she grinned as she embraced him. Taking on a more serious tone, Buffy turned to Angel and ran her finger along the features of his face. "I know it's going to be a difficult transition, Angel. But we can be happy together."

"Yes, Buffy, I've never been happier than I am standing here with you." The comment touched Buffy's heart as they passionately kissed.

. . .

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The End

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