Stories Worth The Telling: Chapter Seven: Take Away My Sorrows
by I Heart The Nerd Herd
Andrew yearned for adventure, but the biggest action in Sunnydale was the Bronze. The only action in Sunnydale besides demons was the Bronze. Andrew decided that was the best place for him to go now. That was the best place for him to go. He grabbed his jacket off the hook and walked down the front steps of Buffy’s porch to the Bronze.
*~*~*~*~*
They carded Andrew, so he got stuck with a Diet Coke. He had always gotten what he wanted with Jonathan and Warren, but now he had to wait till he was twenty-one. He fiddled with the straw, sitting at the bar all alone, listening to the band on the stage play a somber song. The song reflected the whole atmosphere of the Bronze tonight. Everyone looked sad. Even the bartender who had carded Andrew looked sad. And here he thought they got satisfaction out of not giving an underaged kid a beer.
Suddenly Andrew heard a scraping noise and someone pulled up a chair next to him. At first he assumed the person was just up and the bar for a bit, but no. The person was here for him. The person wanted to talk to him. It was a guy.
“Hi,” was all he said as he sat next to Andrew, beaming.
“Hi.”
“You just having a Coke?” the man pressed. Obviously he couldn’t take a hint.
“It’s Diet.”
“And somehow that can take the place of alcohol? Here, let me buy you something. What do you want?”
“How about a Bud Light?”
“A man who knows what he needs. Yo, Tender Guy. Two Bud Lights, please.”
“In a can or a bottle?” the bartender asked as if a string were being pulled at his back.
“Bottle.”
“That’ll be 10 dollars.” The man slipped out his brown leather wallet, produced a ten dollar bill and laid flat on the table. The bartender slid it over to him, put it in the register and clanked two open bottles of Bud Light on the table.
“What’s your name?” the man asked Andrew.
“Andrew.”
“I’m John. Look, I guess... I’m not like hitting on you or anything... Do you want sit at a table?” Andrew furiously wanted to decline the offer and take the beer and mope, but this John character *had* bought if for him. He did have a bit of an obligation. This John character also looked pretty lonely, like he didn’t know anyone in the Bronze, so Andrew figured he might as well go mingle.
“Oh, yeah, sure.” The place was pretty empty. It wasn’t hard to score a table at all. Andrew and John pulled up there chairs. Andrew took a big swig from the beer bottle, wiping his mouth on his sleeve.
“You from around here?”
“Uh-huh. I live on Revello,” Andrew answered. Was this guy hitting on him? Because he was kind of hot... And if Spike was really not interested, maybe moving on would do a body good.
“Oh, I know where that is. I’m new. Just moved in.”
“You live alone?”
“No. Maybe. Yes.”
“Must be pretty dull.”
“Yeah. You live alone?”
“No. I live with... friends, I guess you could call them.”
“Are they guys?”
“Some of them, yeah. Mostly girls. Lots of girls, why?”
“Oh... Sorry, I thought you were...”
“Gay?”
“No, I... No.”
“That’s okay if you did, because I am.”
“You are? You’re not just... saying that?” Andrew couldn’t help but laugh. John was very much at ease, which made Andrew feel much more open. John also seemed very uncomfortable, which somehow made Andrew more comfortable. Maybe because for once in his life, he got to have a bit of authority. Even if he really didn’t.
“No, I’m not just saying that. Kinda the reason I’m here...” Andrew trailed off, taking another swig of Bud Light.
“Looking for someone?”
“No, actually, trying to get over someone.”
“Bad breakup?”
“No. We were never together.”
“Oh, so the guy was straight?”
“As a nail.”
“You loved him?”
“I dunno. I couldn’t really tell... It was just... It was just hard, you know? I came out pretty much because of him. I came out *to* him, but... I guess it’s just emotional baggage. That’s all it is. Just baggage.”
“Sounds like more to me. What’s his name? Maybe I could try him?” Andrew laughed again.
“His name? Spike.”
“Doesn't sound like a romantic fellow.”
“Oh, and that is where you are wrong. He *is* a romantic. Total romantic. He is a romantic-a-thon, is what he is.” John laughed at Andrew this time.
“I don’t guy for sappy guys, anyway. Was he good looking?”
“Oh, yeah. He was one of those guys that turn you on in one glance, you know the type?”
“Like you did to me?” Andrew turned bright red.
“So that’s why you’re talking to me. Thought you saw specialness.”
“Dunno if *I* saw specialness, but this guy,” he pointed down to his pants, “Certainly did.” Andrew laughed again. “And he’s normally not this friendly.” Andrew turned red again.
“I’m just a nerd,” he sighed. “I’m not a boner worthy guy.”
“No, but you are.” Andrew was at a loss. He stared into John’s eyes, looking for that same expression that he had seen is Spike’s eyes earlier that night, but he didn’t see it. He saw something he had never seen. Truth. Love. Hope. Trust.
“You’re not too shabby yourself,” Andrew smiled. “But why me?”
“Why you? You where your soul out on your sleeve. You where your heart like a jacket. I could see who you were and the things you’ve been through and the kind of life you lead. I could see you and I knew.”
“You knew what?”
“That I could love you.”
“What if I had been straight?”
“The proper red faces would have been given and I would move on.”
“But... How can you do that? When you see this person? When you’ve touched this person? How can you just be like ‘Oh, sorry’ and move on. How can you give them up?”
“It’s not a ‘How can I?’ kind of deal, Andrew. It’s an ‘I have to’ kind of deal. You *have* to move on. It’s not healthy. And you touched this Spike guy?”
“Yeah. Little more than either one of thought, most likely.” John raised his eyebrows. Andrew laughed. He looked cute like that. He had blue eyes like Spike’s, but they were softer, sweeter, more comforting. He had thick, curly black hair that rested peacefully and attractively against his forehead. He wasn’t a sexy guy like Spike, but he was a beautiful man. He didn’t turn Andrew on with a smile, but he was less closed, less out of his grasp. “Uh, we were playing Truth or Dare,” Andrew explained.
“Ah. What did you get dared to do?”
“French kiss.”
“Ooh. Did he like... retreat into his little antigay shell?”
“For awhile. Then I tried to talk to him, didn’t work. It was a very, very confusing conversation. But I know he knows now, you know? Knows how I care about him and how I’ll always care about him. I had to get out of the house. Came down here.”
“Did it go badly?”
“No. But it changed... How I think about things. How I’ll be able to think about things. How I’ll be able to think about him.”
“These things often do.”
“And I sort of wish I had never talked to him in the first place, but I guess it would have been fuel for fantasy, you know? And I sort of wish he had completely shut me down, too. He didn’t. He never said never. He never said no. And I sort of wish he had so I didn’t have that hope. Didn’t have to be disappointed when it was a no or hurt his feelings when I move on and tell *him* no.”
“That’s a bad situation, that one. What are you going to do when you have to see him again?”
“I dunno. Probably act like it never happened. Like he’s bound to. He’s not a very open person. He likes his privacy. Likes to keep people at a distance. Well, not really, but you have to break him down a lot before he really opens wide enough. Well, not really... He’s just a hard person to understand. He’s Spike.”
“Spike... I’ve heard of him before, I think. Bleached blond fella? Into kitten poker?”
“Yeah... Wait, how do you know about kitten poker?”
“Half-demon.”
“Oh... Right...”
“That’s not going to a problem, is it? It’s not like I’m fucking evil or something.”
“No, no. Considering the love of my life, or what I thought was the love of my life, was a vampire, it really has no meaning to me what race you are.”
“Cool. You seem cool like that.” Andrew laughed. “Listen, I... I know this is fast, and I know... We don’t have to do anything except talk, watch TV, maybe play Game Cube, but I was... I was wondering... Would you like to come over to my house, later tonight? Like, right now?” John shifted uncomfortably in his chair. Andrew nearly laughed again, but he knew it would wound the man’s pride. Andrew leaned over the table, elbows on the table, stomach pressed against the edge, and planted a tender, gentle kiss on John’s lips. He didn’t make it deep, he made it short, and sweet. Just to get a feel of him. Just to get a measure.
“I’d love to.”
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