Last Few Minutes of Becoming Pt. 2: Last Few Minutes of Becoming Pt. 2
by Spikes Honey
SPOILERS: Up to Becoming pt.2

RATING: I dunno, PG?

CONTENT: Nothing bad, major depressiveness, Angel & Buffy kissage...

SUMMARY: Last few minutes of Becoming pt.2 from Buffy´s POV

DISCLAIMER: None of the characters belong to me (blah, blah, blah...), they belong to Joss Whedon, WB, and Mutant Enemy (Grrr, argh...)Please don´t sue.O:)

AUTHOR´S NOTE: Hi! This is my first piece of fanfic, so please go easy on me! Please tell me what you think, e me at buffyangel_fan@hotmail.com. Thanx.

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I had him at last. After all that time of preparing myself for this moment, it was finally here. I remember it clearly. Angelus, the deamon that wore my beloved´s face was kneeling, helpless in front of me. It was what I had waited for, prepared myself for what seems like years, although this nightmare I´d lived through begun only a few months ago.

One last blow was all it would take, I would finally rid the world of this monster. Although, I admit, it was mostly for me. The loss I´d suffered in the past months were almost too much to bare. And to think, I did this to myself. The people close to me, the ones I love, repeatedly told me it wasn´t my fault. I know the truth. I never should´ve fallen in love with Angel, but I did. If only I´d known then what I know now. Emotions are weaknesses, they bring you down.

I was sure I would never see my true love again, but when I was about to end the life of Angelus, who had ended the lives of so many others, something happened. His eyes lit up. They glowed a fiery gold. And when the glow was gone, I saw him. Angel. My Angel. The man with whom I´d spent so little time, and yet loved more than life itself. I tried to convince myself it was a trick. It wasn´t him. It couldn´t be him. He´d gone, left me, and was never coming back. But when he spoke my name with the same gentleness he had before, I knew. He´d come back to me. I lowered my sword, even when I had been told not to do so time and time again. But when I saw his eyes through his tear-stained face, nothing mattered, it was only us. Together.

God, he seemed so confused, just kneeling there, asking me what had happened. He didn´t remember anything.

I had been speechless until then. Processing what had happened. Seeing my love standing there, wondering what was going on. I didn´t tell him what the deamon that possessed him had done. How he´d savagely killed. How he´d hurt me. I couldn´t. I forgot. I had thought I could never forgive him. I was wrong. In those moments I saw him, all the pain, hurt and rage were forgotten.

He smelled the blood coming from the cut on my arm. A cut that just moments ago had been caused by his sword, empowered by him. Angel questioningly told me I was hurt, and pulled me closer to him. We hugged. I was once again encircled by the arms I´d longed to be in for such a long time. He told me he felt he hadn´t seen me in months. I closed my eyes just for a moment, taking in his smell, his touch, and everything I´d yearned for during that time we were apart. Then, I made the biggest mistake, I opened my eyes, only to see that Acathula was waking up. I pulled back just enough to see Angel´s face. He looked concerned, but I told him not to worry about it. We kissed a sweet kiss, tears pouring down our faces, tears of both joy and concern. While we kissed, everything was forgotten, Angel had never been gone, Acathula never awakened. It was just us. I knew it couldn´t last a lifetime, no blissful moment ever does. The vortex was getting bigger. Why?. I´d just gotten him back. Couldn´t we be happy for just a moment?. Guess not.

I wispered "I love you", and like a reflex, he said he did too. I knew what I had to do. Why did it hurt so much?. I asked him to close his eyes. He did so without the slightest doubt. He trusted me with his life. And I was going to end it. I kissed him briefly one last time, and then, I pierced his stomach with my sword. He opened his eyes because of the pain. I gazed into them hoping to find anger, hurt, betrayal. But all I could see was love, warmth and understanding. He held out his hand, and I just stared. I couldn´t believe what I´d just done. I had just sent the one person I love and trust the most to meet a horrible fate. He called out my name one last time, as if hoping it was all a nightmare, that I´d wake him up. With that last word he´d uttered, he´d told me a lifetime´s worth. He had said he understood. He loved me. He loved me and I killed him. I thought I´d find some peace in thinking I´d done this to save the world. Wrong again. What was the word compared to my Angel? The world had never given me happiness, understanding, comfort. Angel had.

There´s not a minute that goes by that I don´t wish I´d taken his hand, and let the vortex envelop us both. We´d be in hell, but together, it would be heaven.

Instead, the darkness closed around Angel, alone.

Now the world really has taken everything from me. Angel was my everything, and now he´s gone...

END

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