The New Me: Part 1
by Krissy108
Ever since Angel moved to Los Angeles he'd been alone. When he left Sunnydale he told himself it was the right thing to do. But looking back on it now it was one of the worst choices he'd ever made. He kept telling himself things would get easier. that he'd forget about her with time. But she was all he could think about, her face haughted his dreams. He had to see her, he's heart ached for her smile, her beauty. So one day he finally broke down packed his belongings and sped away. He made his way to Sunnydale and hopefully back into Buffy's arms.
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" I can't believe I did this." Angel said to himself as he stared apon the old mansion, untouched still. He could faintly smell her warm vanilla scent in the air. He longed to see her, he missed her so much he had to go to her, not nessisarily to speak to her just to watch her sleep, he missed all the nights he spent looking in on her sleeping peacfully. Once his things were in the mansion he headed to that fimiliar street, that very familiar home.
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He'd begun to regret his choice to walk. He was beginning to feel his age. He finally approuched her house, but his mood had changed. Now he was just getting worried, wondering if her feelings for him had changed. But there was now a bigger problem, every window in Buffy's home was dark. The place looked like it haden't been lived in for months. " Where is she." he said to himself. He knew somthing was wrong he had to find answers. The only person he knew haden't given up on him ..... Willow.
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"Good" He murmered to himself as he saw Willow was home. He jumped over the hedges and and began furiously knocking on her window until she came. " Willow... umm..., can I come in?"
"Ohh well sure." Willow said shocked at her midnight visitor. " Angel , sorry to ask, but why are you here?" " Sorry, I decided L.A. wasen't for me. Wheres Buffy? she wasen't at her house, Is she here with you?" Angel asked sounding more like a child, searching for a lost toy than a man." Angel you haven't heard have you, I can't believe no one told you." "Told me WHAT!" Angel asked angrily." Its Buffy she......I'll start at the beginning, we had a run in with a bad gang of vamps a while back, it got pretty ruff, a few of us didn't make it....." Willow said holding back the tears welling in her eyes.
"Buffys dead?" Angel interupted tears in his eyes aswell. " No, well in a way... Angel she was turned we tried SO hard to restore her soul but Giles, he was killed before we could do it." Willow said putting a hand on Angels shoulder." Willow it can't be... she just can't.."
"Angel we can fix this I just need you help. We CAN get our Buffy back."
"What do I have to do, anything to get her back." Angel said with hope in his eyes. "Well first we've gotta find her." " I can do that." Angel said wipping the tears from his face and charging out the door.
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So far he'd searched the streets, abandoned buildings until he made his way throught the sewers, his least favorite place. He could recognize her scent in the air. He could recognize the crys, he'd memorized there sound after the years of pain he'd put her through. Up ahead he could see a heap of somthing moving. He ran to it seeing her golden blonde hair. He lifted her frail body. She haden't eaten in ages." Get off me soul boy.." She moaned. She began to squirm in his arms, but she was to weak to escape Angels grasp."Sorry Buffy not part of the deal." Angel had found her and there was NO way he'd loose her again.
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She'd layed like that in his arms the whole way home. He could see it in her face , throught the pain and hunger, a sense of peace. But he couldn't let her looks cloud his judgement. This wasen't Buffy it was the evil demon that had taken her away from him. He managed to get her back to the masion without a fight. He could tell she'd given up on feeding. Even without a soul she couldn't bring herself to drink. There was no use in chaining her, she was in no condition to fight him." I knew the second you heard you'd come running, thought itd be sooner thought." Buffy spoke with an evil chuckle. Angel just sat there wondering how he could let this happen to her. "OKAY big guy just sit there and brood just like always." " I'm not gonna talk to you when your like this, the sooner Willow gets here the better." Its seemed to click in Buffy's head just what she was there for. She leaped from the bed trying to flee but Angel was having none of it. She was quickly slammed against the wall. " I don't think so," Angel said angrily at 'Buffy'
"Ohh I see you two are gettin along well." Willow mockingly said to the couple. Angel thought twice about the chains and quickly bound Buffy to the wall before joining Willow." Willow do you have everthing you need?" " Yea , I've got everything right here." Willow said while mixing different herbs and liguids unknown to Angel. He was more than ready for this. He'd been without Buffy for so long, he didn't know how much more his heart could take. Willow began her chanting and Angel knew it was time, and so did Buffy. She began pulling at her chains, shouting things that made even Angel blush. "You can't get rid of me, I'll always be there just under the surface, just waiting for you to let me out!" Buffy screamed at Angel knowing just what to say to hurt him.
"No. thats where you're wrong, your NEVER getting out." Angel spat angrily at Buffy. Just then Willow finished her chant, Buffy was enveloped in a yellow glow. Angel winced as her painful screams filled the air. Angel knew just what she was going through. Willow ran to Buffy's side as the light grew dim. " Willow NO!" Angel yelled pulling Willow back. He could her Buffy growl as she lay there waiting for Willow to make a move. "I don't think shes ready for a coming home party just yet." Angel said trying to lighten the mood a bit , but failing." Lets go a little slower." Angel said as he slowly made his way toward Buffy. "Buffy its Angel, your home now." He said as he reached a hand out. He jumped back startled as Buffy darted toward him growling like a rabid animal." Willow I don't think you should be here for this." Angel said walking Willow to the door. "Okay but if you need anything, just call." Willow said the defeat evident in her eyes. Seeing it angel added "Willow its gonna be okay, I promise." Buffy had grown quiet now. He stared at her pale cold form as she shook back and forth murmuring unknown words to herself.
"Buffy its me no ones going to hurt you here, your home its me , Angel." He reached out to hold her. Surprised she recieved him with open arms. "Angel, i never never ment to hurt him....I ....just couldn't stop myself. em so sorry .." She said her words nearly muffled by her crys. "shhhh shhh Buffy its alright that wasen't you Buffy it was a demon, not you." They sat there like that he cradled her in his arms, all night. Buffy cryed until she couldn't cry anymore. That night he acted as her support, her gardian angel.
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Buffy awoke to somthing she'd really missed. Angel. He'd moved her to the bed during the night.
"Angel." Buffy said awoken by the buzz of a microwave."Here" Angel said handing Buffy a mug of warm blood. " I .. don't think so."Buffy said turning away from the mug."Buffy you have to, your so weak already." Buffy exepted the cup and downed it."Ewww." Buffy said childishly."I know its, like that for a while." Angel said sitting down beside Buffy on the bed." Does it get any easier?"
"Over time, Buffy I think we sould make a visit to Willow and Xander they'll be so glad you know your back." " Are you sure Angel after all I did to them.. Angel..I killed..." Buffy said her voice cracking from crying so long." Buffy its okay it wasen't you they know that." He said holding Buffy in his arms." It was ! It was me that killed them , OZ , GILES , ME I DID IT, ohh my god.. how can anyone forgive me." Buffy said pulling away from Angel's loving arms. Angel got up to hold her. " They can't .. I can't.." Buffy said crying into Angel's chest. " It wasen't you buffy remember that." Buffy pulled away from his arms once again not feeling worthy of his touch.
"Thats were your WRONG, Angel it WAS me, this...this THING... the new me!"

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