Strictly Hush-Hush: Part Three
by Willow2
I did not create, nor do I own, the major characters in this story. Buffy, Xander, Angel, Giles, etc. all belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I did, however, create the storyline they now inhabit. Thanks to Laur, who originated the idea for a “film noir” episode of Buffy. The title for this story comes from the excellent movie “LA Confidential.” That’s it. Hope the lawyers are happy.
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“...Debonair/ is what you’ll seem/ So groom your hair/ with Brill Cream!”
As Buffy and Giles walked down the hall to the broadcasting room, they could hear strains of music coming through the walls. Suddenly the assistant producer who had been scolding Buffy moments before appeared from around a corner.
“It’s about time!” she exclaimed. “They’re just finishing up the sponsor slot. Mr. Harris is going to do his introduction, and then you’re on!”
“Mr. Harris?” Buffy asked aloud, to no one in particular.
Giles looked at her quizically, but didn’t answer. Instead, he bent his head down and said in a low voice, “Buffy, don’t mention anything to Mr. Harris about your expired studio contract, alright? Let’s just keep that between us for now. Strictly hush-hush, got it?”
Buffy nodded silently. Oh great, she thought. Giles is using slang. This must be a dream.
The still grumpy producer opened the door to the broadcasting booth and motioned Buffy toward the center of the room. Standing there, mic in hand, was none other than Xander, in a very loud zoot suit. The sound man gave him the cue, and Xander began to talk a blue streak.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you. And a great big how-do-ya-do to all you lovely people out there in radioland! This is Entertainment Exclusive, with your host, yours truly, Xander Harris. That’s Xander with an X, not Zander with a Z. The X is for X-clusive, which I always get!”
Buffy’s jaw dropped. Xander flashed her a toothy smile and held out his hand for her to join him at the opposite mic.
“My guest this evening is someone who needs no introduction. Buffy Summers is lovely and talented and, in my opinion, we haven’t seen enough of her recently. Any new projects for you at Warner Brothers Studios, Miss Summers? When can your adoring fans expect to see you on the silver screen again?”
Buffy paused for what seemed like an eternity, trying to think of what to say. “Ah, um, I’m not supposed to talk about it,” finally came out of her mouth. Oh great, she thought. Just brilliant.
Xander raised one eybrow and looked disapproving, but he quickly recovered. “Ohhh, I see! A big secret, huh? Strictly hush-hush? One of those projects where even the water boy is sworn to silence. Well, that certainly explains your absence these days from the society pages.”
Buffy smiled, relieved that Xander had managed to make some sense of her babblings. “Yes, that’s it,” she said. “Sorry I can’t give you more details.” She looked around for some kind of signal from Giles as to what to do here, but he was nowhere in sight.
“Well, all your loyal fans will certainly look forward to the star-studded premire that is sure to accompany the release of this mysterious big picture. And you can bet your lucky stars that yours truly, Xander Harris, of Entertainment Exclusive, will be there to roll out the red carpet for you. Alright folks, we’ll be right back with more Tinsel-Town news after a few words from our sponsor.”
The sound man gave him the okay, then Xander put down the mic and walked over to confer with the assistant producer while the Brill Cream singers began their number again. Buffy turned and headed for the door, eager to get out of there and find Giles as fast as possible, before anyone asked her any more questions she couldn’t answer.
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