Defying The Odds: Torture
by spikester_05
Torture
The moon was up; Buffy was snuggled comfortably beside him as his thirst for blood increased every time he sees her pulse throbbing… The pain he has to endure even without a soul the sacrifices he has to make for loving The Slayer.
“Spike? What’s wrong?” as Buffy saw the anguish in his face.
“Nothing love, I was just thinking,”
“Of what?”
“Nothing in particular.”
And for once after Spike’s return, which has been for a month now, she truly felt alone. He wasn’t talking lately. He’s been keeping to himself, he’s always been grumpy, and his mood easily changes. He always picks a fight with Angel. He wasn’t talking to her, especially to her.
With this thoughts Buffy disengaged herself from Spike’s embrace which resulted to a raised eyebrow and a mocking smile.
“Sick of my company love?”
“You tell me…” and she went to sleep.
Spike rose from the bed and dressed. He went on his way haunting the streets of LA. Walking along a deserted alley, he came across an unfortunate beggar who he bled dry to satisfy his hunger. Spike couldn’t erase the fact that he was a vampire and was now not only without a conscience but most of all without a soul. What can he possibly offer The Slayer? Nothing but immortality and hunger for blood but even that his “heart” wouldn’t allow him. Denial was so easy for the last few weeks but now the craving was so great and even his love for Buffy found its boundary.
Buffy woke up the next morning drench in her sweat and scrambling to get up. Looking beside her Spike was not there only increased the fear she already had.
“Spike! Spike… Come on, where are you?” Buffy’s voice thundering over the lobby of the still empty hotel.
“What’s this wake up call all about?”
“Giles, Spike is missing! I can’t find him anywhere!”
“Come on Buffy, he’s a big boy now! And old enough to carry himself.” Angel said behind her.
“Angel please help me find him,”
“Find who, love?” Spike said entering the lobby.
Buffy flung herself towards him and engulfed him in a tight embrace. Spike was confused but hugged her fervently. Angel saw something in Spike and the smell of human blood stung him. Easily he knew where Spike was.
“I’m sorry; please don’t do that again…”
“Wait a minute, love! What’s going on? Angel what did you do to her?”
“Don’t look at me Spike! WHAT did YOU do?” Angel challenge him... Letting him know that HE knew what he did.
Tears were running down Buffy’s eyes. She became so dependent on Spike. The Slayer too has changed! She has forgotten her duties and got caught up with her romance. Spike knew this was one reason he had to get away from her. He wanted The Slayer whom he had loved not just some head-over-heels twit. Spike caught himself, when did he start thinking of Buffy as a twit?!
“Buffy? What’s gone over you? What happened to you love?”
“Oh Spike! I thought you left, I thought you were gone, please don’t do that again?” as she buried her face into the side of his neck.
Days passed since that encounter. Spike has been up to his ears feigning interest in everything Buffy has to say. What happened to the strong, independent, stubborn slayer he has loved? She’d become so weak he never thought he’d complain anything about her!
“Spike, can we talk?” Angel said standing behind him.
“What is it now? Rat me off to every one of my nightly escapades? I wouldn’t
question the fact that you’d love to do that!”
“It’s not that. It’s something more to do with the slayer,”
“Bloody hell! Can you not all for just one second get off my back! You’ve been breathing down my neck ever since I came back and honestly Buffy’s not helping much and so are you! So why pretend you’d want to help?!”
“That’s just it Buffy gone off her mind. She’s not her bloody self anymore,” Angel worriedly said.
Spike turned to stare right into Angel’s eye and grabbed his coat and backed him up against the wall.
“What did you just say? She’s not in her right mind? How dare you say that of her and you proclaim your so called love for her?”
“Stop pretending! Look at her for once she’s not the Buffy we all once knew! And you of all people should know that. Don’t you think what you’re doing is already betraying her? Prowling the streets at night for blood?”
Unaware of the shadow lurking behind the curtain the two vampires continued to argue. Buffy heard it all. She was looking for Spike when she came across the two undead arguing. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing it was as if they were conspiring behind her back. And when the voices ceased, she came out and went to walk the empty streets.
What had happened to her? Did she really become weak? Had she totally gone off of her mind? Spike, it was etched in his voice, he’d already gone tired of her! What was happening? Everything was slowly crumbling around her. And Angel, Angel brought the subject up. He thought she was out of her mind, did he think of her as useless? All these questions continued to run into the Slayers head. She walked the streets as if ceasing to exist. Once or twice people passed by her and saw the blankness her eyes projected. And suddenly without warning the Slayer dropped dead on an empty alley three blocks away from the hotel…
“What happened? Where’s Buffy?” Dawn asked as she slowly descended the stairs and seeing the creases etched on everybody’s forehead.
“Morning sugar! Care for some breakfast?”
“Spike! Where is my sister? And don’t you stall!”
“Calm down puppet, she’ll be alright. Maybe she just went out for a walk. Willow along with the others is looking for her.”
“No! Something’s just not right! I know it, Buffy no longer goes out ALONE, and she no longer takes walks!”
“That’s just it! You saw it too didn’t you, Buffy’s changed,” Giles mused.
As they were discussing this the door suddenly banged open revealing Xander carrying a limp body.
“What happened?” Giles rushed to their side as he ushered them down to the couch.
“She’s dead,” and everyone looked at Spike, he knew for he could no longer hear her heart beating.
“What did you just say?” Xander stood up heading for Spike.
“I said she’s dead! BLOODY HELL! You of all people should know that you carried her!” Anger, guilt, and torture were evident in Spike’s voice.
“What? How? Why? She can’t be!” Dawn stuttered as she tried to deny the inevitable and rushed towards Willow’s consoling embrace.
“She died of a broken heart,”
“What? I… far as I know she’s got no heart problems” Andrew offered.
“Not that! But have you heard of someone dying of loneliness, of longing, of guilt or despair? That’s what happened to Buffy. A voluntary heart failure, she wished to end it all and her heart and mind complied, she died a silent and painless death.” Angel supplied.
Spike has already vamped-out and he rushed towards Angel throwing him across the room. Thrashing the place and throwing everything in his way.
“How can you remain bloody calm when you know she’s dead!!!”
“Because I know she will still live,”
“What the hell are you talking about? Angelus can converse better even if he usually kills anything on his way compared to the wimp you’ve become!”
“I… I’m not performing any more spells of… of…” Willow started to talk when,
“There’s no need for that. This ailment which has corrupted Buffy is irreversible. No matter how you try to bring her back there would only be failure. You can’t bring someone back who has WILLED herself to die. She can only come back on her own accord.” Giles willingly said.
“But what if she won’t and we bury her and then she decides she wants to live again? We can’t leave her six feet underAGAIN!” Dawn whimpered.
“That’s just it, we can’t bury her.”
“But… but she’ll rot!”
“No she won’t, people dying of broken hearts won’t rot. They only truly die when they decide to come back and discover they’ve already been buried!”
“I won’t! I won’t allow you to bury her!’ Spike spoke up after the long discussion everyone was having while he and Angel were trying to pulverize the other.
Buffy was laid on their bed with Spike never leaving her side.
“Come on love, you can do this! I promise I’ll never lie to you again just come back. You know I love you for just who you are even though for these past few weeks you’ve got some loose screws in your head,” Spike tried to lighten the mood for she never woke up and it’s already been three days.
Unbeknownst to all of them Buffy has been there the whole time…
Three days ago…
“Xander put her to bed and Dawn eat some breakfast will you child, Willow go try and help Xander, and for heaven’s sake will you two stop acting like children try to be something else…” Giles ordered and chided Angel and Spike who were still trying to kill the other.
“Bloody hell mate! Who cares of heaven’s sake?! I’m rather worried of Buffy’s!”
“Stop being a pain and try something useful for once!”
“Useful? I already saved the bloody world and lived through hell not to mention with you! HECK! I’d rather enjoy having Angelus here than you!”
“Guys what’s going on? Hello? Come on guys stop messing around!” Buffy hollered as nobody heard or even saw her waving her hands right in front of Spike then Giles.
“OH MY GOD!” Was all that was said when Giles walked right through her. “I’m dead!”
“Bloody hell! Where are you going?”
“Away from your bantering, thank you.”
“Angel… phone!” Came Dawn’s voice from the hallway.
“Gracious! Nice to hear there’s still monsters pestering the neighborhood, thought we’d be out of business by now and with all these people around…” as Wesley came out of the office.
“Yes, we do monsters and the kind. Yes, we also do vampires and werewolves… why the interest anything going on at your house lately?”
“HEY! Do you do dead people cause there’s one roaming your HOUSE!” Buffy yelled at Angel’s ears.
Back to the present…
“Argh! What am I to do? I can’t leave this forsaken place that I know since I’ve tried THAT…” as she recalls when she tried to run away when she saw her body laid on the bed and Spike feeling morose, “What am I?! Left here to haunt this place as if it needs haunting with the kind of people living here! I tried but I can’t return to my body, and neither heaven nor hell want to come get me, am I truly that useless!”
“Come on love, ‘tis been days come back,”
“We’ve tried every book there’s still nothing about the subject, Giles.”
“Willow, are you sure every book has been looked into? Maybe we missed something here, something vital,”…
A/N: Tune in 4 more… if you feel lyk 8 reviews are welcomed and would really be encouraging… hope you had fun reading…
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