Love Hurts: Love Hurts
by TammyDevil666
Title: Love Hurts
Author: TammyDevil666
Summary: Buffy and Spike have a fight and something terrible happens, which makes Spike regret his actions.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Buffy/Spike
Feedback: Any comments would be appreciated.
Author's Note: This is an AU of the 4th Season, so things are definitely different.
Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me.


She ran after him and when she caught up to him, she grabbed his arm and turned him to look at her. "Spike, can't we talk about this?" He ripped his arm out of her grip and glared at her.

"There is nothing to talk about, Slayer. I'm sick of you and this whole sodden town." Buffy couldn't believe that he was acting like this. They seemed to be getting closer lately and she thought he loved her.

"I don't get what your problem is. I thought things were getting better with us. Isn't this what you wanted?" Spike gave a harsh laugh.

"You think I wanted you? You're nothing to me. You're the Slayer and I'm a vampire and that's all there is to it. I'm tired of your games, pretending that you actually give a damn about me when we both know that you don't. You tell me that you have feelings for me and you expect me to believe that? I'm not stupid, Buffy. I know you could never love me and you know what? I really don't care because I don't love you. I never did. When I told you I did, it was a lie. I could never love you. You're the bloody Slayer!" Buffy was shocked at his statement and felt tears in her eyes, but she tried not to show them.

"Why are you saying this? I thought you cared about me." Spike moved closer to her and brushed some hair out of her face and moved toward her ear.

"Newsflash, baby. It was only about sex. How could anyone want anything else from you?" He whispered in her ear before she pushed him away from her. Buffy couldn't help the tears from falling now and she grew angry.

"You bastard!" Spike only smiled at her.

"Not your best, Slayer. Don't start the waterworks now, that's just really pathetic." Buffy glared at him.

"I can't believe I actually started to feel something for you. I started to think that you were more than a monster and that you were actually someone worth my time, but I guess I was wrong. I don't want anything to do with you and if you're so sick of me and this town, then maybe you should just leave and this time don't come back." She told him with venom in her voice.

"For once you make sense. That's exactly what I was planning on doing." Buffy stepped away from him, the tears still falling down her face.

"Good, and while you're at it you can go to Hell." She said as she then took off in the other direction and far away from him. Spike's smile faded once she was gone and he rubbed his face. He couldn't believe everything he just said to her. None of it was the truth, but he felt that it was the right thing to do. She would be better off without him. She had no idea that he did it to save her life. He was walking, when he felt a presence behind him. He stopped and let out a sigh.

"You can come out, I know you're there." A figure then stepped out of the shadows and smiled at him.

"Right, I forgot about those vampire senses." Spike turned to the familiar man once he made his presence known.

"We had a deal, Gavin. I did what you wanted and you promised to leave town and stay away from her." Gavin walked closer to him.

"Yes, I have no reason to kill your precious Slayer now. It looks like you already did that for me." Spike glared at him.

"What are you talking about?" Gavin gave him a twisted smile.

"You actually thought that the Slayer would be safer after you rejected her with your lies? She may be safer from me, but her heart is now broken and that will easily get her killed. I guess you didn't think about that, did you? Well, it was fun while it lasted, William. We'll meet again." With that said, he vanished out of thin air. Spike stood there thinking about what he said, when he got a bad feeling that Buffy was in trouble. If something happened to her, he would never forgive himself. With that thought in mind, he took off to try and find her.


* * * * *


Buffy got to the dorm and she thought that she cried all of her tears out, until she walked in her room and saw Willow. The tears then started to fall again and she fell to the floor, holding her head in her hands while she sobbed. Willow went to her friend's side and helped Buffy to her bed. "Buffy, what happened?" Buffy then stopped crying a little and looked up at Willow and told her friend everything that happened with Spike.

"I don't know what happened, Will. Things were going fine with us and I thought that he actually loved me. He told me he did and he was so caring and sweet, but now I don't know who he is anymore. I guess it's true, I really do turn men into monsters when I sleep with them." She said as she continued to cry. Willow didn't know what to do to make her friend feel better.

"That's not true, Buffy. Maybe there's a good explanation for his behavior. I know he really cares about you." Buffy gave a laugh through her tears.

"Yeah, he has a good way of showing it." She then looked at Willow, with a serious expression. "Is it me? Is there something wrong with me?" Willow shook her head.

"No, there's nothing wrong with you. He was just being an idiot." She told her and Buffy looked away.

"I think I'm the idiot. I just don't get why this keeps happening. Why do guys keep leaving me? There has to be something wrong with me." She explained and Willow didn't know what to tell her. Buffy then wiped at her tears angrily. "I have to get out of here." She said as she stood up and walked to the door.

"Where are you going?" Willow asked and Buffy turned to look at her.

"I don't know, maybe I'll patrol or something. Killing things might make me feel better. I just can't sit around feeling sorry for myself, I have to do something." Willow nodded in understanding. "I'll be back soon." She said before she left the room and headed to the nearest cemetery.


* * * * *


Buffy was walking for what seemed like hours and she couldn't find anything to kill, so she left the cemetery and just walked around until she felt like going back to the dorm. It was late so no one was really out on the streets, until Buffy heard something coming from the alley behind the Bronze. She went to check it out and what she saw was an angry man holding a knife at a young girl that looked really scared. "I told you to give me your money!" The girl didn't move and Buffy then walked quietly behind the guy, so he wouldn't hear her. When she was close enough, she brought her leg up and kicked the knife out of his hand. He yelled in pain and grabbed his hand, when Buffy then turned to the girl.

"This would be a good time for you to run away." She said and the girl took off, without even looking back. Buffy turned back to look at the man on the ground. It sucked that he was a human so she couldn't kill him, but beating him to a bloody pulp would be just fine. She crossed her arms over her chest. "I've never dealt with muggers before, so I hope I'm not rusty." The man stood up and glared at her.

"You'll pay for that, you little bitch!" With that said, he grabbed for her and she started to fight him. She was surprised at his strength, but he wasn't stronger than her.


* * * * *


Spike looked everywhere for Buffy and couldn't find her, so he decided to try the Bronze. He heard a commotion coming from the alley and went to check it out.


* * * * *


Buffy was fighting off the guy as best she could, when he then reached into his pocket. She was too distracted to notice that he pulled a gun out, until it was sticking her in the abdomen. She wasn't expecting a gun and she didn't have much time to think about it, when he smiled at her. "Say goodnight, bitch." He then pulled the trigger.


* * * * *


Spike stopped when he heard the gunshot and then ran even faster. When Spike got to his destination, he saw Buffy with another man and the man had a gun in his hand. He ran toward them and punched the man hard in the face, which knocked him to the ground and he didn't seem to be getting up. Spike ignored the pain that shot through his skull as he turned his attention to Buffy. "Are you alright, love?" Spike then noticed the look on her face and saw her hands holding her stomach; it was then that he saw the blood oozing out of a pretty fatal gunshot wound. Buffy tore her hands away and looked at the blood on her fingers, when she then fell down and landed in Spike's arms. Spike felt for her pulse and it was weak. No, this couldn't be happening. "Come on, Buffy. Stay with me, pet." Buffy's eyes opened to look at him.

"Spike, you're here." She said and he smiled at her.

"Of course I am, sweetheart." He explained.

"I thought you hated me." Spike then felt tears in his eyes at what she said.

"I could never hate you, Buffy. God, I'm sorry for everything I said. I didn't mean it; I thought I was doing the right thing. I realize now that I wasn't. I'm so sorry." He said as tears streamed down his face. Buffy touched his face and then brought her hand back to her stomach. She had a serious expression on her face now.

"I'm dying, aren't I?" She asked in a shaky voice and Spike shook his head.

"No, I won't let you die. I can get you to the hospital; you just have to hold on." Buffy shook her head this time and that even took a lot of energy.

"It's too late, Spike. I can feel it." Spike grabbed her hand.

"Don't talk like that, love. It'll be okay, I won't let you die. It's not your time." Buffy then had tears coming down her face.

"I love you." She whispered to him and Spike knew that she was saying goodbye. He leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips.

"I love you, too. You can't leave me, pet. I need you." Buffy touched his cheek again.

"I'll never leave you." She whispered and he could feel the life slipping out of her. Buffy was crying as she brought her hand back down and she then realized what was really happening to her. "I'm scared, Spike. I don't want to die." She said as the tears fell down her face. Spike grabbed her to him and kissed the top of her head.

"God, I love you so much. Please don't leave me." Spike then looked at Buffy and saw that her eyes were open and lifeless. He knew that he lost her. He closed her eyes and continued to hold her to him as he rocked her back and forth. He then grew angry and looked up at the dark sky. "Why her? Why did you have to take her? She was so young, it's not fair." He said as he dropped his head and continued to cry. After what felt like forever, he gently placed Buffy on the ground and stood up. He looked around and noticed the man that was still unconscious. He felt like ripping his damn head off for taking her away from him, but for some reason he couldn't do that and it wasn't the chip. He would have welcomed the pain. Spike would let the police deal with him. He stood there and watched Buffy a little while longer, he then noticed the stake sticking out of her pocket. He went to grab it and squeezed it so hard that blood was oozing out of his hand, but he didn't seem to care. He held the stake over his heart and looked at Buffy's body. "I can't be in this world without you, pet. I know there's no chance that I'll ever get to be with you in Heaven, but maybe someday we'll get to be together again." He said as he then plunged the stake into his heart. "I love you." Was the last thing he said before he exploded into dust, the ashes falling over the body of his dead love. May they rest in peace!

The End


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