Coma: Chapter 4
by Wolfkin
Chapter 4

Buffy stood by the hospital bed and watched the sleeping blonde for a few minutes, her thoughts fast and somewhat confused. One thought stood out clearly, though, and, impulsively, she suited thought with action. Bending over Tara's bed, she pressed a soft kiss to her friend's forehead. "I'm so glad you're still with us, Tara!" she whispered. "We've missed you and needed you every day since... since..." She couldn't say it.

She straightened and took a step back, watching her friend as she slept, thinking back over the last half hour. She'd summarized the events of the previous year, stressing the parts that Tara had been involved in or where Willow had continued to improve in her control of her magic addiction. She'd just gotten to the part of Tara's return to the house and Willow she knew about when the witch had stopped her, saying she was tired. Tara had fallen asleep almost immediately, leaving Buffy to watch over her and think.

The largest portion of those thoughts were on the conversation she and Giles were gonna have when she saw him again, mostly about secrets in this bunch being a bad thing. She'd gotten passed her initial anger that he didn't tell them about Tara not being dead. Buffy thought she could understand why he didn't tell them, especially Willow, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt.

Buffy looked up as the door to the room opened and a nurse came in. "I'm sorry miss, but this ward has limited visiting hours," she said, apologetically.

The Slayer simply nodded and turned back to Tara for a moment. She brushed some hair off the witch's face, then turned back to the nurse. "I understand," she replied softly. "Since she's awake now, will you move her to a regular room soon?"

The nurse waited until Buffy had preceded her from the room, then answered, "Yes, she'll be moved in the morning. Just check the information desk as you come in and they'll be able to tell you what room."

Buffy noticed the satisfied, almost happy tone to the woman's voice. "You're happy she's leaving, aren't you?"

She smiled at the petite blonde. "Very much. It's not often someone gets to leave from this ward, unless it's to go to the morgue. We're always happy to lose one 'upstairs', rather than down ."

The younger woman made a sympathetic face. "I take it most people here don't wake up?"

"Most people in here are really dead, their bodies just haven't figured that out yet," she explains, not pulling any punches. "Up until last night, we were pretty sure your cousin was in the same state." She looks back at Tara's room and smiles. "Happily, she proved us wrong."

Buffy returned the woman's smile. "Maybe the others here will too."

"We pray for that pretty constantly," the nurse assures her.

The Slayer's smile gets a little warmer and she extends her hand. "Thank you for taking such good care of Tara. I can't tell you how good it feels to have her back."

The nurse smiles again and takes her hand covering the back with her other one. "It was our pleasure, Miss. I hope she gets to go home soon."

Buffy smiled her happy smile. "Thank you. I do too." She looked around the lobby and the small waiting area. "You didn't happen to see where my friends went, did you? A redhead and young brunette?"

The nurse gives her a regretful look. "Only that they left the ward. I'm sorry. I have no idea where they might be." She pauses, then asks, "Would you like me to call the front and see if they're there?"

The Slayer shakes her head, a small smile on her lips. "No thank you. I'll see if I can find them as I go." She touches the nurses arm and her smile becomes bigger and warmer. "Thank you again for taking care of Tara for us."

"You're quite welcome, dear. We're just all so happy you have her back!" The older woman pats Buffy's hand in a motherly fashion. "Take care of her now, okay?"

"We will, don't worry!" the blonde assures her fervently. "I hope you have another good night." Buffy smiles at the woman. She smiles in return and thanks the Slayer before turning and resuming her duties.

Buffy walks to the elevators and waits patiently, then rides to the lobby and heads for the front entrance, all the while absently looking for Willow or Kennedy. Most of her mind, though, is still on her upcoming conversation with Giles and how to break this wonderful news to the rest of the Scoobs.

Dawn, she knows, will have to be physically restrained from rushing down immediately, but she can do that easily until the explanations sink into the teen's head. Xander will help her with keeping Dawn at home, but he'll be just as happy and impatient to see their blonde witch friend.

Anya, now she was a bit of a mystery. While Buffy had no doubt the former demon would be happy to see her friend was not dead, Anya was never easy to predict. She was also unsure how Spike would react, but, again, at least it should be a happy reaction.

The blonde shook her head and turned her attention to her surroundings, carefully looking for her wayward friends, but coming up empty in the lobby. After a moment, she shrugged. It was still daylight, so it was much more safe to walk home now. As upset as Willow was, she thought maybe that was what had happened.

That theory was shot as she walked out the sliding doors and noticed both girls on a nearby bench. She feels her eyes opening a little wider is mild shock at seeing Willow on Kennedy's lap, although, twelve hours ago, she would've rolled her eyes at this sight and went back to what she was doing. Now, after witnessing the scene in Tara's room, she was confused by the sight of Willow curled into the younger girl, Kennedy holding her close, like nothing had happened.

[Sooner I go over, the sooner I understand what's going on], Buffy thinks as she walks toward her friends.

Kennedy looks up at the sense of movement and sees Buffy coming toward them. She looks down at Willow and nuzzles her hair. "Buffy's here, Will," she whispers near her ear.

Willow lifts her head from Kennedy's chest and looks at her best friend. She makes no attempt to move away from Kennedy, but asks, "How is she? Did she remember anything else? Does she want to see me?"

The Slayer watches the confused, hurt look flicker across the potential Slayer's face and suppresses another urge to fuss at her friend. Looking at Willow, she replies, "She's asleep, no, but I started telling her what she missed and she didn't say anything about that. The nurse I talked to said they'll have her in another room by tomorrow morning, so no more dungeon crawls." Buffy thinks for a moment. "Other than that, you know what I know."

Willow squeezes Kennedy's hand, trying to show that this time, she's aware of her surroundings as she quietly asks, "Did - did she say what she can remember?"

Buffy just stares at her best friend, trying to gauge what's going on in the redhead's mind. Finally, deciding they're going to have another little talk when they get home, she sighs and answers. "She said the last thing she remembers clearly is the morning after my birthday party. After Halfrek lifted the curse and we could all leave the house. Anything after that is either a blur or a blank she said, though she did seem to recognize a few things when I told her about them. Well, maybe," she says, considering.

Buffy chuckles and smiles wanly. "She wants to fuss at Xander for leaving Anya at the alter. She said she couldn't believe he did that!"

Willow smiles and giggles a little. "Buff, it's been a little over a year and I have trouble with that sometimes!" Her grin turns reflective. "On the other hand, I think they're patching things up, now. Maybe they'll get back together."

"Yeah, maybe," Buffy softly agreed. "Hey, you guys ready to head home?"

Willow nods, a little reluctantly it seems to Buffy. "Yeah, I guess I am." She turns her head to look at Kennedy and asks, "Are you ready, sweetie?"

The potential nods absently, still a little lost by Willow's confusing actions and words.

The redhead smiles at her, then lightly kisses her cheek. "I think you promised me a picnic." she chirps, a teasing smile playing about her lips. Leaning in, Willow hugs the younger girl, whispering in her ear, "I'm really sorry if I seem to be ignoring you again. I hate that I did that earlier and I'm so sorry that I did. I'm not doing it now, cause I know you're here and you'll never know how much that means to me. Thank you, baby. I promise, we'll talk over everything when we get home, but not here and not with Buffy there." She pulls back enough to see dark eyes regarding her steadily. "Okay?"

Slowly, almost reluctantly, Kennedy nods and tries to smile. "Okay," she whispers, then repeats it with more volume and conviction. The dark haired SiT forces a smile to her face, even though inside, she's dying because she just knows she's lost the redhead now. Lost her to the blonde witch everyone told her, repeatedly, was her soulmate. "Okay, but I'd like to stop by the store for a minute, if that's okay. We didn't have any kind of dessert at home and I know big your sweet tooth is, Will."

Willow smiles happily and kisses Kennedy's lips quickly, but chastely. "You spoil me so much!" She declares, her smile genuine and caring. Crimson locks flying as she quickly turns her head, the witch looks at Buffy. "We can stop, right? Please?"

Buffy looks into shining green eyes, then into troubled dark brown and just nods. Her Slayer hearing easily picked up everything Willow whispered and she wants to tell Kennedy that the younger woman isn't the only one who's confused right now. Willow's earlier reactions and her questions a few minutes ago just don't seem to go with the terms of endearment she seems to be applying to potential Slayer.

The blonde mentally shrugs her shoulders and steps back, giving Willow and Kennedy room to stand. Once they're on their feet, she turns slightly and leads the way away from the hospital, wanting to be away from the place badly. She's been here far too often recently.

After a quick stop, the trio gets back to Revello Drive without incident, though somewhat laden down with groceries. Once at the supermarket, Buffy decides that, since they're there, they might as well stock up now instead of waiting a few days.

Buffy's scowl started as she watched Willow with Kennedy at the store, has deepened immensely by the time they arrive at the Summer's home. Willow's seeming to forget all the problems the passed few hours had brought, her flirting with the potential over desserts and just in general, seem to Buffy like her friend was just stringing the girl along before dropping her for Tara. She knew Willow wasn't like that, but just couldn't shake the thought.

As they walk into the house, the witch turns to her girlfriend and smiles. "Sweetie, why don't you get our picnic started and I'll be there in a few minutes to help, okay?" She kisses the brunette's cheek. "I need to talk to Buffy for a minute, then I'll join you, okay?" With a significant look at the Slayer, Willow let her know she had noticed the looks and faces the blonde had been giving her since they left the hospital.

The potential Slayer looks from the witch to the Slayer, then back again before nodding. She forces a smile for Willow and heads off for the kitchen.

Buffy waits until the teenager is out of earshot, motioning for Willow to follow her into the living room. Once there, she turns to her best friend and quietly hisses. "Will, what the hell are you doing? We both know just how much you've loved Tara since the day you met her. If she forgives you again, or remembers and wants you back with her, you'll go so fast, teleporting would be slower!" Buffy closes her eyes and sighs, trying to calm herself again. "Since we both know that's true, why are you stringing Kennedy along? I need everybody I've got for this fight and if you'll just break her heart and get it over with, maybe she'll be useful again by the time the fight happens!"

Willow stares at her friend, her expression going from polite curiosity to disbelief, to the beginnings of anger. "Actually, Buffy, I don't know that that's true. I mean, I've changed so much since the last time I saw Tara. I thought she died in my arms. I became everything we fight against. I've killed people, I almost killed you, nearly destroyed the world. How will she be able to forgive me for that? How can she even look at me?" Fat tears begin to form at the corners of Willow's eyes.

"Oh! And then there's just this tiniest little detail of I've pretty much fallen in love with Kennedy! How does that fit into you whole 'Dump her and run back to Tara' scenario?" The redhead wipes impatiently at the water leaking down her cheeks as she turns a little away from Buffy and stares out the window.

Not seeing the shocked expression Buffy has from her admission, Willow takes a deep breath and continues, "And before you ask, Buffy, yes, I still love Tara. I don't know how to not love her. An-and if it wasn't for Kennedy, even Slayer strength wouldn't have gotten me out of that hospital. But, Kennedy is a part of this and she and I haven't even talked about it yet. Not really. We're going to this evening."

Buffy manages to find her voice after a minute. "Did..." The blonde clears her throat. "Did you just say you're in love with Kennedy? But - you still love Tara?" Buffy's voice rises in confusion.

Willow smiles a little as she thinks of the younger girl at the other end of the house. "Yeah, I did. I kinda... worked it out earlier today. Just before the call, actually. And yeah, of course I still love Tara." Willow pauses, memories of her time with the blonde witch rushing through her mind. "You never forget the first person you fall totally in love with, do you? I mean, you still love Angel, right?"

"Well, yeah. I always will," Buffy responds automatically, then what Willow said registers. "Wait. First person? What about Oz? I know you loved him. I was there for the meltdown when he left."

The redhead smiles softly, indulging the Slayer in the digression from their talk. "'Course I loved Oz, but with him, it was kinda like sliding into love. We were together a lot and he was nice and he liked me cause I was me and one day I just realized I loved him. I mean, it happened pretty quick, but not like with Tara. With her, I saw her at that first wicca group meeting and I got so confused. All I could do was stare at her. I got so mad at the other girls when they were mean to her and I didn't know why."

"Do you remember the Gentlemen?" The witch asks.

Buffy nods, although she's not sure what that has to do with anything. "Oh, yeah. I remember that's when I found out I really liked Riley and that he worked for the Initiative. We kinda teamed up for the first time there at the end of all that."

Willow smiles and nods. "Yeah, I remember you telling me. What I didn't tell you was, that was the first night Tara and I got together. She was coming to our dorm room looking for me, hoping we could maybe do a spell to get everybody's voices back. She was being chased by the Gentlemen and then I came out to see who was pounding on doors and found her and then we both were being chased and we ended up in the laundry room." Willow's eyes are hooded and she smiles faintly as she remembers that first real meeting. even through the danger, it had felt right.

"I tried to move the Coke machine in front of the door, but I didn't have enough power. I was going through all the spells I knew, trying to think of one I could use, when she took my hand in hers and I felt her offering me her power to go with mine. We both looked at that Coke machine and it almost danced across the floor and in front of the door." She pauses, remembering the exhilaration of that first time they cast together. "We met up the next day to talk and stuff, then we had lunch the day after that and I went to her dorm room to do a spell with her and pretty soon, anytime I wasn't with you or Giles or in class, I was with her.

"Then Oz came back, " she says softly, her smile dimming just a little. "When that happened, I had to get my head to admit what my heart knew from the second I saw Tara. That I was crazy in love with her and had been since the first day I saw her." Willow looks at her best friend and her smile brightens again. "You remember all that, though, cause you're the one who told me to follow my heart. I did, straight to her."

Buffy smiles a little at Willow's reminiscing, but still looks a little confused. "Okay, I get what you're saying about Tara, but what does that have to do with Kennedy? As near as I can see, she chased you until you let her catch you. I mean, I can accept you saying you're in love with her, but I don't see how it won't come down to her broken and useless to me when you choose Tara."

Willow's happy expression from thinking about her and Tara's first months together sours a bit at Buffy's words and she frowns slightly at her old friend. "Because the same thing kinda happened with Kennedy. The only real difference was, I recognized what was happening and I didn't wanna let it, cause Tara was my girlfriend and I couldn't cheat on her." Willow grins. " I noticed Kennedy as soon as she walked in the door and snapped off at you. I almost laughed when she just wasn't impressed by a girl smaller than her!"

Buffy lets a sour little half smile slip across her face for a second. She remembers that first meeting as well, and she remembers being furious that she was so casually dismissed by the younger girl. A girl who was only a potential Slayer, someone who couldn't even conceive of what she'd been through to save this sorry world. Although, the blonde had to admit, after the showdown with the Turak-han, Kennedy had started to show her a little more respect.

"I remember that first day she was here," Willow continues. "All I wanted to do was stare at her and I felt so guilty because of it!" She smiles as the memory of Kennedy's first flirting runs through her mind. 'You, uh... better not hog the covers!' Willow smiles at her best friend as her eyes refocus on now. "You weren't here when the flirting really started. I was trying to get her and the other girls a place to sleep and she just kept objecting to what I said until I asked if she wanted to do it and she just smirked and told me I better not hog the covers, then ran upstairs and I was so confused and attracted to her and I didn't want to be, but I was and then Dawnie distracted me and that was good."

She pauses, then blushes a little. "Sorry. Didn't mean for this to turn into a babblefest."

Buffy tries to resist, but can't stop the smile that sneak across her lips. "Will, it's you. Babble is a given!" Willow rolls her eyes and smiles a little, lightly hitting Buffy's arm. The blonde smiles again, then sobers a bit. "Okay, Will, I think I get it. You love them both, right?"

The redhead nods, a little reluctantly it seems to the Slayer. No, not reluctant, she decides. Acceptance.

Buffy sighs, wondering how to fit this latest complication into her war plans. After a moment's consideration, she realizes she can't, she's just gonna have let it happen the way it was going to, plan around it and adapt. Sighing again, she returns her attention to her friend. "Well, assuming Tara gets her memory back or decides she wants to give you guys another change, you know you're going to have to choose between them, don't you? I mean, you can't have them both, now can you?"

Willow looked up at Buffy defiantly. "Why can't I? Is there a law?" She held Buffy's disbelieving gaze for a moment before she dropped her eyes and admitted, "Okay, I guess I can't." She takes a deep breath, then continues. "I love Tara. I always will, but now I love Kennedy too." She looks at the blonde. "How can I just choose which one I want to be with? How could I just choose one and leave the other one be all broken hearted?" She asks, miserably.

She looks away and down, her eyes filling. A solitary tear slides down her face. "I remember how it felt the day Oz left, the night Tara left me. I wanted to die, Buffy." She looks back at the Slayer and Buffy feels her own tears threaten. "I love them both, so much, how can you sit there and tell me I have to hurt one of them?"

Buffy reaches out and wipes the tears from Willow's cheeks. "Like I told you that morning when it was Oz and Tara, no matter what, somebody's gonna get hurt. I'm not trying to be mean here, Will, but that's just the way it is and the longer you put it off, the more it'll hurt everybody, not just one person." She takes a deep breath and locks eyes with the distraught witch. "Will, you know I love you. You're the best friend I've ever had, would ever want, but this is something you can't really put off too long. Not for me or the fight with the First, but because of you, Kennedy and Tara and how much this is gonna mess with all of your lives."

Suddenly, she smiles and takes Willow's shoulders into her hands, giving her friend a little shake. "Now, no matter what I just said, I think it can all wait until tomorrow at least, so you should enjoy your picnic tonight, okay? I mean, how many chances are you gonna get for one until after we kick the First's ass, right?"

Willow just stares at Buffy like she's lost her mind, but, quickly, the blonde's words get through to her and she finds herself smiling. She giggles a little, despite her remaining tears. "Yeah, that's true, so you're just gonna have to kill it quick, so we can get back to more important things!"

Buffy laughs and hugs Willow tightly. "You got it, Will. I'll get right on it!" She declares, before pulling back. As she does, she wipes more tears that have appeared on the witch's face. "Tell you what. You go wash your face and get cleaned up and I'll tell Kennedy you'll join her in a few minutes, okay?" She waves Willow's protests aside. "Won't she worry if you go in there now, looking like you've been crying and all upset? You don't want that."

Willow sighs and sits back. "Yeah, okay, you're right, I guess." She smiles at the Slayer. "Thanks Buffy, for everything. Even the stuff I didn't want to hear." She takes a deep breath and slowly releases it before continuing. "I know I have to talk to both of them, especially Kennedy. Now, I have a better idea of what I want to tell her later." She stands and smiles back down at the blonde. "Could you tell her I'll be there in about ten minutes, please?"

Buffy takes one of her hands in her own and gives it a little squeeze. "I can do that." She returns Willow's smile and watches as she turns and heads upstairs. The blonde sighs heavily and let's the smile slip from her face as she tries to think of what she can do to fix this, or, at least, mitigate the damage. Nothing readily occurs to her, except a burning need to talk to her Watcher. All this could have been avoided, she is certain, if he'd just told them that Tara hadn't died.

Sighing once more, she stands and starts to slowly walk toward the kitchen. As she'd told Willow, she knew at least one person was going to get hurt when this was all over. She just hoped she could keep them alive when it happened.

With a little head shake, she shoves it all to the back of her mind to deal with later, forces a smile onto her face and goes to find Kennedy.


Author's Note: I'm afraid it's gonna keep being a little slow on action for a little while, probably up through chapter 6. The action should pick up there. Oh, and I have a question. I wanted to save Chloe, but soon realized I set this up to start after she was already dead. You guys think I should rewrite history just a little more and save her? Review and let me know, okay? :)


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