36

Life returned to normal, or relatively close to it, for the couple. Buffy was released from the hospital the following day under strict orders from Dr. Zimmerman to take it easy for a week. It put a crimp in her plans for her honeymoon weekend with Angel, but he surprised her a month later with a long weekend in Las Vegas.

Griffin pleaded guilty to vehicular assault and was given a sentence of six months in prison and a permanent restraining order against Buffy and Angel. He apologized to Buffy during his sentencing, stating that he had been misguided and insanely jealous; he never meant to cause her any harm. He asked for her forgiveness but she wasn't able to give it at that point in time. It would take a long time before she'd be able to do that, considering what Griffin's jealous rage had almost cost her.

The baby was fine. He or she survived the ordeal without any complications. A sonogram several weeks later showed that the baby was in perfect health with no lasting damage caused from the accident. Both Buffy and Angel breathed a sigh of relief when they heard the good news. Even more good news came their way when they were told the baby was a girl.

"Wake up, birthday girl," Angel whispered in Buffy's ear on January nineteenth, tickling the back of her neck.

Buffy groaned, forcing her eyes to remain closed. "No. Don't want to wake up," she complained.

"It's your birthday. I took off from work so we could spend the whole day together. And I don't plan on spending it in bed."

"I'm too fat to move. I'm gonna stay here until I give birth," she told him.

Angel laughed; it was a conversation they'd been having every day for a month. "You are not staying in bed for another two months. You'll get bed sores."

"I don't care."

"I do. Come on, I've got the whole day planned for us. We're going to take Brandy for a walk, then we'll go shopping for something nice for you at the jewelry store and go to my parents' house for dinner. My mom baked a cake and everything," he said. "It'll be fun."

"My birthdays are never fun."

He smirked at her, prompting his wife to shoot him a dirty look. "I seem to recall a rather fun birthday you had. I believe it was your eighteenth."

Buffy sighed, recalling it. "Yeah, that was a good time."

"If you stop complaining, I'll give you a repeat of it this year. Think of it as deja vu, only eleven years later."

"Eleven years. God, I'm twenty-nine. I feel so old."

"Old? Twenty-nine is hardly old, Buffy."

"Sure, twenty-nine isn't old. But what happens next year when I turn thirty? It all goes downhill from then on."

Angel shook his head; he'd never seen Buffy act like this. "You are overreacting."

"Spoken like someone who isn't twenty-nine yet," she stated. "You don't know what it's like. Just wait until May when you turn twenty-nine and see how you feel."

"Is it your hormones acting up again?" he asked. He'd seen her do and heard her say some crazy things over the past few months when her hormones were in overdrive.

Buffy scoffed. "Bite me. You try being twenty-nine, seven months pregnant and thirty pounds overweight and see how you feel."

He rolled his eyes. "Do you want me to wear the belly again?"

Buffy shook her head. "As amusing as it was the last time, no. I want to be eighteen again. That was my best birthday ever."

***

//"Happy eighteenth birthday, sweetheart," Buffy's mother said to her, handing her daughter a small, gift-wrapped box.

Buffy looked at the present curiously. "Mom, what's this?"

"Open it and you'll see."

"But you already bought me so much stuff. A CD player, which probably cost you a fortune, and a VCR. Now what did you do?"

Ms. Summers sighed; her daughter was always asking a million questions. "As I told you before, open it and see."

Looking at her boyfriend for some sort of clue, she groaned when he didn't give her one. "Okay. But you've already bought me too much stuff."

She slowly tore away the wrapping paper, finding a jewelry box. 'What on earth did she get me?' Opening the top portion of it, Buffy gasped at what she found inside: a gold claddagh ring with a heart-shaped emerald. "Oh my god, Mom This is way too much! You shouldn't have."

"My baby girl only turns eighteen once," her mother told her, a proud smile on her face. "Do you like it?"

Buffy nodded vigorously. "I love it. Hell, I've loved it since I first saw it at the store. But how did you know I wanted it?"

Angel raised his hand guiltily. "That would be my fault. I saw you staring at it last time we went to the mall. And I know your mom was looking to get you something special, so I told her about it."

"You little sneak!" she hissed, slapping his arm playfully. "I told you how badly I wanted this ring and you kept saying it was way too expensive."

"It was, for me. But not for your mom."

Buffy stood up and crossed the living room to give her mother a kiss and a hug. "Thank you, Mom. It's the best present ever."

"You haven't seen Angel's gift yet," Ms. Summers informed her, a half-smile playing on her lips. "If you think I spoiled you, you're in for a big surprise."

"Ooh. What is it?" She turned her head and wiggled her eyebrows at Angel.

He looked at her mother. "Do you mind if we go over to my house for the present? I sorta wanted to have some privacy for it."

"Sure, go ahead. I'll clean up here. But I want Buffy home by nine o'clock. It's a school night." Even though she knew Angel's parents were out of town helping Alexis move back into her dorm, she completely trusted the couple. Buffy had told her time and again that she planned to wait until after high school before entering into a sexual relationship, and that Angel respected her decision.

***

Buffy sat down on Angel's bed, giddy as a schoolgirl. "Where are my gifts? Come on, give them to me."

Angel laughed at her. "You're awfully greedy. Besides, what make you think you are getting more than one present?"

"Mom said you spoiled me," she reminded him. "That usually entails more than one present."

"Well, that's true. I actually got you two gifts, but she only knows about one of them. The other one is private."

"What are you waiting for? Gimme!"

He reached over and grabbed the box sitting on his dresser, handing it to his girlfriend. "If you don't like it, it can be returned."

She knew she'd like it. Angel always bought her the most thoughtful gifts. What she found inside, though, completely blew her away. "Angel…"

"What do you think?" he asked hopefully.

"It's beautiful." He had purchased a gold necklace with a diamond pendant for her, the three diamonds below one another from smallest to largest.

"Each diamond is symbolic," he began. "The small one represents yesterday, the one in the middle is for today and the largest one represents tomorrow. When I saw it in the store, I knew I had to buy it for you."

She gazed at it in awe. "It must have taken you forever to save up enough money to pay for it."

"I did some extra tutoring and my parents raised my allowance a little bit. But it was worth it."

"Well, I love it. I'll never take it off." She paused for a moment. "You mentioned something about two gifts. What else did you get me?"

Angel blushed slightly at what he was about to tell her. "It's not exactly something you can gift-wrap. It's more personal than that…much more personal."

"Such as?"

"I love you, Buffy."

She grinned at him. Hearing Angel say it wasn't exactly new to her; he'd first told her on Valentine's Day of 1989. "I know you love me. I love you, too."

Gulping, he took a deep breath. "That's why, for your birthday, I want to show you."

"Show me?" she repeated. But the look in his eyes said it all. "Angel, you know how I feel about sex. I want to wait until after were are out of high school. I thought we decided on graduation night to be our first time."

"Yeah, I know. I'm not talking about sex. This will be about me showing you exactly how much I love you and want to be with you. It's nothing that will result in a pregnancy. I swear. No exchanging of bodily fluids."

Buffy knew what he was getting at; it was something she'd been thinking - and fantasizing - about for some time. But thinking and doing were two different things. "Angel, I don't know…"

"How about this, if you're uncomfortable, or don't like it, we'll stop. I just wanted today to be special for you and for us. It'll be my gift to you."

Looking into his brown eyes, she saw all the love he felt for her. In her mind and in her heart, Buffy knew Angel would never hurt her. And with that thought, she gave herself over to the only man she'd ever love.\\

***

37

Buffy woke up with a start, the pain reverberating through her body. Biting her lower lip, she stifled a cry so as not to wake her sleeping husband next to her. The last thing she wanted to do was wake him up, especially not in the middle of the night; not after the last time. A few weeks earlier she had suffered through false labor, sending Angel into a panic. He'd all but berated her obstetrician when she explained to them it was a common occurrence in women nearing their ninth month of pregnancy.

She patted her belly once the pain subsided. "What's the matter with you? Don't like what Mommy had for dinner?"

Rewarded with a kick from her unborn daughter, Buffy smiled and went back to sleep.

***

"Holy crap!" Buffy yelled two hours later, awoken by yet another pain.

Opening his tired eyes, Angel rolled over to find out why his wife woke up yelling. "What's going on?"

She groaned for having woken him up. "It's nothing, Angel. Just an upset stomach. Seems our daughter is rebelling against last night's dinner."

The look on her face didn't leave him one hundred percent convinced. "You look like you're in pain."

"It's nothing," she repeated. "Just go back to sleep."

Angel shook his head. "Now I'm wide awake. Let me boil some water for a hot water bottle. It'll make you feel better."

"I'm sorry for waking you up," Buffy apologized. "You've got class in the morning."

"Don't worry about it. Lay back down while I'm getting the hot water bottle ready," he ordered, climbing out of bed.

She looked at him and smiled; she couldn't have asked for a more perfect. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

He padded into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep from his brown eyes when he turned on the hall light. The light practically blinded him, and woke up Brandy in the process. From her makeshift bed under the kitchen table she growled at him.

"It's only me, Brandy," Angel said to his furry companion. "No need to growl."

Hearing her master's voice, Brandy got up and walked over to him, nipping at Angel's heels while he searched for a saucepan to boil water in. He couldn't help but laugh at the dog, realizing she probably missed the constant attention he gave her before Buffy arrived. But he wondered how Brandy would react once the baby was born.

As he filled the pan he found with water, Angel heard a piercing shrill come from the bedroom he shared with his wife. Dropping the half-filled pan in the sink, he ran to her side.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" he asked.

Buffy shook her head. "I don't think so. I think I'm in labor."

"It's probably false labor, just like the last time," he reassured her. "I'm sure it'll pass in a few hours."

"This isn't false labor, Angel." She lifted up the blankets for him to see. "My water just broke."

***

"How are you feeling, Buffy?" Dr. Albertson asked when she entered her patient's hospital room.

Buffy shrugged her shoulders. "I'm okay now. Much better since the drugs have kicked in."

Dr. Albertson laughed at the comment. "You wouldn't believe how many times a day I hear that. Let's see how much you've dilated since the last time I checked on you." Putting on a fresh pair of rubber gloves, the doctor examined her. "Six-and-a-half centimeters. That's good."

"How long before hard labor starts?" Angel wanted to know.

"It all depends on how quickly she dilates. Pushing usually begins at nine centimeters, but Buffy has to get there first. She could get to nine in an hour, or it could take three hours. The best I can say is relax and let nature take its course."

Buffy released her husband's hand. "You should call your parents and let them know what's going on, Angel," she suggested.

"No way. I'm not leaving your side," he disagreed.

"Go. This baby isn't going to be born in the next five minutes. Go call your family and give them the good news."

Sighing, he relented. There was no arguing with her. "Okay. I'll be back in a couple minutes." After quickly planting a kiss on her forehead, Angel left the room.

"Thank god," Buffy whispered once he left. "I thought he'd never leave."

Dr. Albertson chuckled while going over her chart. "I assume your husband is getting on your nerves."

"Big time. I would kill to have five minutes to myself. I love him to death, but I'm about to kill him with my bare hands."

"It comes with the territory. You're not the first expectant mother to say that. And believe me when I say you won't be the last."

Buffy smirked. "Is it possible to give him an epidural?"

***

"When you feel your next contraction coming, I want you to push as hard as you can," Dr. Albertson told her.

Buffy had reached nine centimeters an hour-and-a-half ago. It was four in the afternoon and she'd been in labor for thirteen hours. It was beginning to take its toll on her; Buffy was too tired to push. She was about to give up.

She nodded her head. "Okay, Dr. Albertson."

"I know you are exhausted, but in a couple of minutes you'll have a little girl," the doctor said.

Angel gripped her hand. "Squeeze as hard as you want, sweetie. I'll be right here."

She didn't have a chance to respond to him, as another contraction ripped through her body. Gritting her teeth, she squeezed Angel's hand and pushed with all her might.

"Remember to breathe," Angel reminded her. "Like in Lamaze class, hee-hee-hoo, hee-hee-hoo."

"I do *not* need to be reminded how to breathe, thank you," she hissed at him. "I've been doing it longer than you have."

"I'm just trying to help."

"You've helped enough. Now just shut the hell up before I see to it that you never enjoy sex again," threatened Buffy.

The contraction ended and she laid her head back on the pillow, completely drained of energy. Angel wiped her sweaty brow with a warm towel.

"You're almost there, Buffy. Another two or three more pushes and you will be able to hold your daughter in your arms," Dr. Albertson encouraged.

"Good. I can't wait for this to be over."

Just when Buffy felt relaxed again, another contraction came. Bearing down as hard as she could, she screamed her way through the pain, willing the whole ordeal to be over.

"I see the head!" the doctor announced. "Come on, Buffy, push her out!"

"I'm trying!" she screamed, still pushing. Unable to go on, she dropped her head to the pillow.

"Her head is out," Dr. Albertson stated. "I need you to give me one more really big push. Can you do that?"

Buffy wanted to cry; wanted to give up. "I can't."

"Yes you can," Angel said. "Just push."

She whirled on him, ready to gouge his eyes out. "You fucking push her out then!"

Another contraction swept over her and, despite her exhaustion, Buffy pushed. And she was rewarded with the sound of her daughter crying.

"It's a girl," Dr. Albertson announced. "And she's absolutely beautiful."

***

38

"Would you like to cut the cord?" the doctor asked Angel when he glanced back up after tenderly kissing his wife on the lips.

"I'd love to," he responded, walking the two feet to the doctor's side.

Gazing upon his newborn daughter for the first time, Angel's heart was filled with such love for the tiny human being. One look at her left him with the desire to protect her for the rest of his natural life. She was his and Buffy's daughter; equal parts him and her, a life the two of them created. Never in his life did he ever believe he would be part of something so perfect.

"W-Where should I cut?"

"Right where I'm pointing," Dr. Albertson instructed.

Doing as she told him to do, Angel took the scissors from her and cut the baby's umbilical cord.

"Angel? What does she look like?" Buffy wanted to know, straining her neck to see what was going on. She had yet to even see her daughter.

"She's beautiful, just like Dr. Albertson said," he informed her. "She perfect. I'm so proud of you, Buffy. You gave birth to our daughter."

"Can I see her?" All she wanted to do ever since she heard the baby cry was hold her in her arms and never let go.

"You sure can," Dr. Albertson stated, wrapping the little newborn in a blanket after having weighed her in. "You'll be happy to hear she's a healthy seven pounds eight ounces."

Buffy took her in her arms, holding her daughter close to her. Her tiny eyes were closed, her chubby cheeks rosy, little sniffles coming from her nose every time she inhaled. Opening the blanket, Buffy counted out ten fingers and ten toes. The mere sight of her made Buffy want to cry.

'Dark brown hair,' she mused. 'She is Angel's. I just know it. No one in Griffin's family has dark hair. Hers is the exact same color as Angel's.'

"My two girls," Angel commented.

"You're right, she's beautiful," Buffy agreed. "It's hard to believe she's finally here with us." She paused for a moment, recalling the awful things she said to her husband while in the throes of labor. "I'm so sorry, Angel."

"For what?"

"For being a total bitch while I was in labor. I didn't really mean those things I said to you," she apologized.

Angel shook his head, smiling. "Don't worry about it. I've seen enough movies to know what is said during labor. Besides, our daughter more than makes up for it."

She sighed with contentment. "She does. I think it's time we pick out a name for her."

"Any suggestions?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. I think I've got the perfect name for her."

***

"How are you feeling, Buffy?" Mrs. Brennan asked her daughter-in-law the following morning. The hospital wouldn't allow Buffy any visitors the night before, so everyone had to wait until the next morning to see Buffy and the baby.

"Like I gave birth to a monster truck instead of a seven pound baby," Buffy said with a laugh. "I'm so sore."

"The first time is always the hardest. The second goes much smoother. I was in labor with Alexis for eighteen hours and Angel only ten. Hence, his name."

Buffy shook her head vehemently. "After going through that experience, I don't want to go through it ever again. Once was enough. The only miracle of birth is the miracle that I didn't die doing it."

"That's what all women say," Alexis added from her spot next to her mother. She'd flown up with the kids when her parents told her Buffy was having the baby. "But in a couple of years you'll miss having a newborn around and you'll want another."

"Let's see how I feel after a couple months of breast feeding and getting three hours of sleep every night."

Mrs. Brennan raised her eyebrows in amusement. "Three hours? You really haven't been around newborns, have you?"

The new mother whimpered. Motherhood was going to be harder than she thought. 'How did my mom ever do it by herself?' she wondered.

"Don't worry, sweetie. You have Angel, and we'll be there if you ever need us."

Angel popped his head through the door, seeing his wife, mother and sister in the hospital room. He'd gone home for a few hours to sleep, then picked up his father, niece and nephew to bring them to see the baby. "Is it safe to come in?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Buffy wanted to know when he entered.

"I didn't want to walk in during the middle of a conversation about breast milk, hormones or whatever other stuff mothers tend to talk about," he told him.

Alexis groaned in mock disgust. "Men are such babies. We were *not* talking about breast milk, thank you very much. Did you bring the rest of my brood with you?"

"They're in the waiting room with Dad. And dying to take a look at their new cousin."

Mrs. Brennan glanced from Buffy to Angel and back again, a confused look on her face. "Don't tell me you two haven't chosen a name for that little angel of yours."

"Actually, we did. We decided on Christina Grace," Buffy said. "But I think we'll just call her Gracie. It means 'blessed'."

Both Alexis and her mother smiled with approval. "I like it. Gracie Brennan has a nice ring to it," Mrs. Brennan complimented.

"I'm going to bring her in here," Angel let them know.

"Oh, I'll go with you, Angel," his mother stated. "I want to see her right now. I can't wait another second to see my newest granddaughter." She followed her son out of the room.

An uncomfortable silence fell over Buffy and Alexis. The two of them hadn't really spoken since the day of the wedding. Alexis, Brad and the children returned to Oregon the next day. Neither had had much to say to each other since then.

"I'm sorry, Buffy. I really am."

Surprised, Buffy looked at her. "You're sorry? For what?"

"I haven't been all that friendly towards you since you came back in Angel's life. All I could think of was how hurt he was last time you two were together. The breakup was devastating to him and I lived through it with him those first few days. I saw what it did to him. I swore to myself I'd never forgive you for breaking his heart the way you did. Even though, technically, he walked away from you.

"But now I see how happy he is, having you back in his life. It's put the twinkle back in his eyes and replaced the spark that's been missing since you left. And now, seeing him with you…well, I know when I'm wrong and I admit it. You've given him his dream of being a father. He loves that little girl so much, I don't think it even remotely phases him at all that he might not be her biological father. Because in his heart, he already is her father."

Buffy grinned. "He is. Lexie, you should have seen him the first time he held Gracie in his arms. There was this instant connection between them. It was like whatever had been missing in his life was suddenly there."

"I could see it in his eyes just a few minutes ago. I hope we can be friends again, Buffy. Like we were back in high school; like sisters. I want to make up for being such a rude bitch to you when you first came back to Sunnydale."

She nodded her head as Angel returned to the room with Gracie in his arms, flanked by his parents, Emily and Steven. "I'd like that a lot. I've missed having an older sister."

***

39

"Are you going to be okay by yourself all day?" Angel asked Buffy a week after the baby was born. He'd taken a week off following Gracie's birth and he had to return back to work.

She narrowed her eyes and smirked at him. "Gee, I think I can handle it. It's just me and a week-old baby. I wonder who'll win…"

"You know what I mean. The first time alone with a baby can be a little overwhelming. I remember Alexis told me she was in tears with Emily the first day Brad went back to work. I want to make sure you're feeling up to it before I leave."

"Don't worry about me. Everything will be fine. Just go to work and educate the next generation."

Angel sighed, picking up his briefcase. "As long as you're sure. But if you need anything-"

"I know, I know I can call the school and say it's an emergency, and both of your parents are home; they'll be here in less than ten minutes if there is a problem. Go to work."

"All right. I'll call during my lunch break."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "I will be looking forward to it."

***

Two hours after her husband left for work, Buffy laid down on the bed they shared, hoping to catch a few minutes of sleep while Gracie napped. No sooner had Angel walked out the door when their week-old daughter began crying. She'd never admit it to Angel, but being alone with Gracie was harder than she had expected. It seemed like nothing she did would calm her down.

But Buffy wouldn't trade her daughter for anything. Despite the crying, dirty diapers, midnight feedings and mood swings, she loved every minute of it. She relished motherhood, knowing ten years earlier she never thought it would be possible to have the life she had with Angel. As she drifted off to sleep, her mind wandered to one of the most heartbreaking nights of her life.

***

//Joyce Summers heard the front door slam shut from where she sat in the kitchen going over inventory for the gallery. She wasn't expecting Buffy to be home so soon from the graduation party she had been invited to. "Honey? Is that you?"

She heard muffled sobs. "Yeah, it's me. I'm going to bed."

"You're home early. Aren't you going to that party you mentioned earlier?" she wanted to know.

"No. I'm tired."

Buffy bounded up the stairs to her room, doing her best to hold in her tears; she didn't want to cry until she was in the privacy of her own bedroom. Once she'd shut the door behind her, she only hoped her mother didn't follow her, asking question after question. When her mother knocked on her door, Buffy knew she could never be that lucky.

"Go away!"

"No. Let me in, Buffy," her mother ordered. "I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong."

She opened the door, hiding behind it. "Nothing's wrong, Mom. I'm just really tired and decided to call it an early night. I'm fine, really."

Buffy's mother entered the room, finding her daughter's hiding spot. The tears in her eyes didn't come as a surprise to her, having heard Buffy's crying. "I beg to differ, young lady. Something is definitely wrong. Did you and Angel have a fight?"

Hearing Angel's name caused the dam to break. The tears she'd fought to keep inside overflowed her eyes, streaming down her cheeks. Joyce saw this and wrapped her arms around Buffy, leading her to her bed.

"So you did get into a fight with him," she deduced.

Buffy shook her head. "N-Not a fight. He left me there. It's all over, I know it is."

"Left you where?"

"That creepy old mansion on Crawford Street. Mom, he just walked away and ignored me when I called after him. He didn't e-even left me ex-explain," Buffy stammered.

Her mother was confused. "Let you explain what? Buffy, tell me exactly what happened, because you're not making any sense whatsoever."

"O-Okay." Sniffling, Buffy waited until her emotions were under control before beginning. "After Angel picked me up, he drove me to the mansion. I didn't know what was going on or what he had planned. Then he started telling me the story behind the original owner and how it was built for his true love. It sounded so romantic, especially the way Angel told it.

"He told me how much he loved it and wanted to live there with his family. I'd never heard him so much as mention the mansion to me before tonight. I didn't even know why he was telling me the story until he got down on his knee and held out the ring for me. It was an engagement ring, Mom. Angel asked m-me to marry h-him."

By the look of devastation on Buffy's face, Joyce knew exactly how things turned out. "And you said no, I take it."

Biting her lip, Buffy nodded. "I had to. I'm only eighteen, Mom. I can barely take care of myself, much less someone else. There is no way I'm ready for marriage. When I tried to tell Angel that, he didn't want to hear it. He thought me saying no was because I didn't love him. But I do love him."

"You should tell him."

"I tried. His mom said he didn't want to see me when I stopped over there." She began rocking back and forth like a small child. "He's never gonna forgive me for this. He's never gonna forgive me. I ruined everything."

"I'm sure you didn't ruin everything, honey. It'll take Angel a few days to cool down," her mother reassured. "Then things will be back to the way they used to be."

"But I *did* ruin everything!" Buffy exclaimed. "Don't you get it? Tonight was supposed to be special. Graduation."

"Graduation is a special occasion. I know that."

A fresh stream of tears poured down her cheeks. "Not just because of graduation. Tonight was *our* night. We'd been planning it for months. It was supposed to be tonight."

"What was?" Looking at the sorrow and loss in Buffy's green eyes, Joyce finally understood what tonight would have been. "Oh. I'm sorry, Buffy. I didn't realize."

"It was going to b-be perfect," she sobbed into her hands. "He got reservations at this beautiful hotel in L.A.. And I bought a-a…a nightgown I knew he'd love. We were going to make love for the first time and now it'll never happen."

Joyce took her crying daughter in her arms. "Sure it will. You just have to be patient and things will work out for the best. If it's meant to be, you two will get through it. It may not happen overnight, so you'll need to be patient."

Buffy looked up, gazing at her mother. "What if it doesn't happen? What if Angel doesn't ever want to speak to me again? How will I go on?"

"Don't think like that. Be more positive. Just remember that Angel loves you and that everything happens for a reason."\\

***

Gracie's cries woke Buffy from her nap. Jumping out of bed, she groggily padded into the nursery with Brandy silently following her. She picked up her crying daughter, holding her to her breast.

"You were right, Mom," she said. "Everything *does* happen for a reason."

***

40

"Wah!"

Through the baby monitor sitting on the bedside table, Buffy and Angel woke up to the sound of their daughter's crying. Neither one of them made a move to get off the bed, despite the consistent piercing cry.

"How long before she starts sleeping through the night?" Angel questioned with a loud yawn.

"Not soon enough," Buffy answered. "I think we have a few more months left to go until we're out of the woods. I'll take care of it this time."

Her words weren't very convincing to Angel as he watched her pull the comforter over her shoulders. "Just stay there, Buffy. I'll see what's wrong with the baby."

"I'm getting up. Really."

Too late. Angel was already climbing out of bed. "Sleep. You're home with Gracie all day long. Go back to sleep, you deserve it."

"Thank you. If she's hungry there are bottles of breast milk in the fridge," she informed him, closing her eyes again.

'God, I hope she's not hungry,' he thought as he made his way across the hall to the baby's nursery. 'Maybe she's only wet and all she needs is to have her diaper changed. That way I'm done in five minutes.'

He groaned when he reached Gracie's room; the cries got louder the closer he got to her. "What's the matter, pumpkin?" he asked, picking her up from her crib. When all he got was another sob in response, Angel shook his head. "I should have known better than to think you'd actually answer me. Are you wet?"

Probing his fingers inside the diaper, Angel was greeted with nothing but dry cotton. "Well, I guess that answers my question. You must be hungry then. Figures. Why is it that every time your mom gets up you're wet, but when I get up you're hungry? Is it some kind of conspiracy, Gracie?"

He carried her out to the kitchen, careful not to trip over anything in the process. The last thing he wanted to do was wake her up even more by turning on the lights. In almost complete darkness, he found his way to the refrigerator and reached for one of the bottles Buffy left in there. The sound of the microwave door being closed after he'd put the bottle inside caused the baby to resume her crying.

"Everything sets you off, doesn't it?" he commented, a sarcastic edge to his voice. "Okay, okay. Will you quiet down if I sing to you? It's worth a shot. Hush, little baby, don't say a word. Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird. And if that mockingbird don't sing, Daddy's gonna buy you a diamond ring. And if that diamond ring don't shine, Daddy's gonna buy you…"

Angel didn't know the rest of the words. 'Dammit!' he swore. "Let's try something different, something your dad knows the words to. Twinkle, twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are. Up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky-"

The buzzer for the microwave went off, letting him know the bottle was finished being heated. Taking it out, he tested it on his hand. Pleased with the temperature, he put it in his daughter's mouth.

"Chow down, chubby," he joked when Gracie greedily began drinking.

He walked into the living room and sat down in the reclining chair facing the gardens, gently rocking back and forth. Holding the bottle in his hand for Gracie, Angel closed his eyes and felt himself drifting off to sleep.

***

//"I got it, Buffy!" Angel called when he heard a knock on the back patio door. "It's probably my mom dropping off more clothes for Gracie."

"Okay. Tell her I'll be out as soon as I'm done with diaper duty," Buffy replied.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the doors expecting to find his mother waiting on the other side. Who he found instead enraged him. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded.

"I've come for what's mine," Griffin Montgomery stated.

"Get out. Get off my property before I call the police," threatened Angel. "I mean it."

From the baby's nursery, Buffy could hear her husband's raised voice. Picking up her daughter, she went to the living room to find out what the problem was. "Angel, what's going on out here?" She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw her ex-husband at the door. "Griffin."

"Give her to me, Brennan. She belongs to me."

"Stay away from Buffy. She isn't your wife anymore. Technically, in the eyes of the law and God, she never was."

Griffin narrowed his eyes, glaring at Buffy and Gracie, who was laying in her arms. "I'm not here for Buffy. What I want is what's rightfully mine. My daughter."

Buffy shook her head. "She's not yours, Griffin. Angel is her father, not you. So just go away. We can pretend you never came here."

"Did you think I'd give up that easily? What do you take me for, some kind of idiot? That kid is mine!"

Pushing Angel out of the way, Griffin barged through the doorway toward Buffy and the baby. Before Buffy had a chance to react, he closed the gap between them and reached for Gracie. Just as he was about to rip her from her mother's arms, Angel grabbed Griffin and yanked him away from the two women.

"You touch them and you're a dead man, Montgomery," Angel said. "Buffy, take Gracie someplace safe."

Nodding her head, Buffy exited the living room, opting for the second floor rather than their bedroom.

"Get your goddamn hands off of me," Griffin ordered. When Angel let him go, he smirked. "Gracie. It's a pretty name."

"I think so. What gives you the right to think you can walk into my home and take my daughter?"

"*Your* daughter? There's just as much of a chance of her being my daughter as there is of her being yours. I don't know if it slipped your mind, beefcake, but I was married to Buffy when that kid was conceived."

"She's mine. You never wanted kids with Buffy, so don't try to claim Gracie as your own. Now get out of my house before you regret ever laying eyes on me. Or my family."

"Sure. Just let me say goodbye to my daughter first."

Not about to let Griffin near his wife and daughter, Angel gripped the back of the other man's neck tightly, pulling him toward the door. "I said get out."

Once he was free of Angel's grasp, Griffin took a swing at him. The punch landed squarely on Angel's chin, knocking him backward from the force of it. Eager for retaliation, Angel fisted his right hand and connected it with Griffin's left eye. Though he'd never been one for violent outbursts, he couldn't stop himself from hitting him. He wasted no time in throwing another one, this time in his wife's ex's stomach.

Lifting Griffin by the collar of his shirt, Angel threw him out the door onto the cement of the patio. "If I catch you within five feet of my home again, I'll get a restraining order."

"This isn't over!" Griffin shouted.

"Yes it is."\\

***

Angel awoke with a start when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. Looking up, he saw Buffy standing over him. "How long have I been out?" he wanted to know.

"A few minutes, I think. When you didn't come back to bed after ten minutes I started wondering what happened to you. Now I know."

He motioned to the sleeping baby in his arms, the bottle still between her lips. "She was hungry. And tired, too."

Buffy smiled lovingly at him. "So were you, apparently."

"A little." He paused for a moment, recalling the dream he'd just had. "Buffy, I had a dream just a couple minutes ago. I dreamt that Griffin came here and tried to take Gracie from us."

"Oh."

"It scared me."

"Angel, it was just a dream. Griffin is in jail, he won't be coming anywhere near us for a very, very long time. Come on, let's go back to bed."

Angel shook his head. "No. He's going to get out someday. And when he does, he'll want revenge, I just know it. If he finds out about Gracie and does the math, he might just take her. I couldn't stand it if that happened."

"It won't. You're worrying for nothing."

"You don't know that for a fact. Buffy, I want to have the paternity test done. I want - no, I need - to know if Gracie is my biological daughter. It's the only way I can protect her; protect us."

"Is that what you really want? I mean, think about it, Angel."

"I have. And yes, I do want it. I want to find out as soon as possible."

***

41

"How are things down in Sunnydale?" Alexis asked her younger brother several weeks later. She'd given him a call after returning home from work in hopes of catching up on the local gossip.

"It's going okay, nothing too exciting going on. You know not much happens in a one Starbucks town like Sunnydale. Spike has been seeing Harmony Kendall, a girl I used to go to high school with. They're a match made in heaven, let me tell you. And Xander's wife just found out she's pregnant," Angel informed her.

Alexis raised her eyebrows upon hearing the unexpected news. "You've got to be kidding me. Anya is having a baby? That will be one screwed up kid."

"You sound like Buffy. Anya isn't bad. I don't know why the two of you don't like her."

"Something about her just rubs me the wrong way. Maybe it's because she doesn't think before she speaks, I don't know."

He shook his head. His sister sounded exactly like his wife. "Well, I'm happy for them. Xander has wanted kids for a long time."

"Just like another young man I know," she commented. "How is fatherhood treating you?"

"It's going great. I'd very much recommend it." Cradling the cordless phone between his head and shoulder, Angel carried Gracie over to her baby swing and gave it a gentle push.

"Thanks, but I've already got two rugrats of my own. No recommendations are necessary. Is Buffy coping well with the baby?"

"Yeah, she doesn't complain about it at all. Having a baby is something she wanted more than anything. I'd let you talk to her but she's in the shower right now. After being with Gracie all day by herself I like to give her an hour or so of alone time."

Alexis found herself amazed at what a caring husband her brother turned out to be. "I envy Buffy, and you can tell her that. Brad never did what you're doing. Trust me, she appreciates the time away from the baby, no matter how much she loves her."

"You don't have to tell me," Angel agreed. "She thanks me every night."

"Tell me, how is my little niece? Walking by now, I bet."

He laughed at his sister's joke. "Walking? Yeah right. She's only two months old, Lexie. Right now, I'd settle for her sleeping through the night. But you wouldn't believe how big she's gotten; you'd hardly recognize her. Gracie has this tuft of curly brown hair that sticks up like a corkscrew, and green eyes just like Buffy. She's going to be beautiful."

"I don't doubt it. That kid has some great genes."

"Yep." He gave the baby swing another push, eliciting a tiny giggle from Gracie. "Speaking of genes, Buffy and I decided to have the paternity test done."

Alexis did not respond right away. "Really? I thought the two of you didn't want to know."

"Buffy wanted the decision to be mine. She said it was a choice made out of concern for me and my feelings. And I wasn't ready to find out until now."

"What changed your mind?"

"A dream I had about two weeks ago. Her ex-husband Griffin showed up at the house and wanted to take Gracie away from us. Even though it was just a dream, it scared the hell out of me. I mean, it could actually happen. And I don't want to take that chance. So we had the test taken a few days later."

She digested the information, imagining the hell her brother must be going through awaiting the results. "I don't want to sound rude or bitchy or pessimistic, Angel, but what if the tests show that you aren't Gracie's biological father? What will you do?"

"Nothing. I consider her to be my daughter no matter what a stupid blood test tells me."

"Then why have it done?" she questioned. "Ignorance is bliss as they say."

"Not in this case, Lexie. I'm not doing it for me; this is for Gracie. Griffin may not have known Buffy was pregnant but that does not mean he won't find out eventually. And when or if he does, he could easily do the math and figure out that he might possibly be her father. I don't want to take that chance with my daughter. I hope you understand that."

"I do. You have more courage than I do."

"No, it has nothing to do with courage. It's about me loving and wanting to protect my family."

***

Buffy swallowed hard as she and Angel entered the doctor's office, holding Gracie in her arms. Today would be the day they would find out if he was her baby's father.

"The doctor will be right with you," the nurse told them.

"Thank you," Angel replied.

'How can he be so calm and cool and collected?' Buffy wondered. 'I feel like I'm going to throw up the last three meals I ate.' "We can still back out of this, Angel."

"We've already come this far, Buffy. I want to find out. Don't you?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I do. But I'm afraid, too. What if it doesn't turn out the way we want it to?" she asked fearfully.

"Then we go on the way we have been. I'm not going to love you or Gracie any less if she's not my biological daughter. I'll still be her father in every sense of the word."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

As they were leaning in for a kiss, Dr. Valenti entered the room. "I hope I'm not interrupting a private moment."

Buffy looked up in embarrassment. "No. Hi, Dr. Valenti."

"Hi, Buffy, Angel. How are you doing today?" she wanted to know.

"Very nervous," Buffy answered.

Dr. Valenti held the envelope containing the results in her hand. "Yes, I'm sure you are. Why don't we get right down to business. Are you ready for the results?"

Angel gripped Buffy's free hand. "As ready as we'll ever be."

"Good." She opened the envelope, reading it over. Looking at the family in front of her she grinned. "Congratulations, Angel. You're the father."

"I am?" he asked incredulously.

"To an accuracy of ninety-nine point nine percent."

Closing his eyes and sighing with relief, Angel hugged his wife. "Thank God."

"I will give you a couple minutes." The doctor left the room.

"I can't believe it," he said. "She's my daughter."

Feeling her eyes burn with tears, Buffy rested her head on his shoulder. "I always knew, Angel. In my heart, I always knew. It was always you."

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