He's changed.  All it took was two bedraggled people …  Correction.  One bedraggled Slayer and his bedraggled Childe was all it took to change him.

There's a light in his eyes that was never there, even before the shit hit the fan.  They make him happy, they give him hope, something that I could never do.  Even Cordelia wasn't able to bring that sparkle to his eyes no matter how hard she tried.

He has hope now.

He's relearning how to live, or at least how to unlive.

I knew who they were the minute they stumbled through the door.  Angel has so many drawings of her it would be impossible not to recognize her and besides, Cordelia told the whole "Buffy and Angel Saga," in one of her sober moments.

"Love, hate, lust, obsession, passion, love, curses, trust, souls, danger, love, heartbreak, tears, love and way too much angst.  A vampire, albeit one with a precariously attached soul, and a Slayer -- they don't come anymore star-crossed than that.  Unless you count a vamp without soul, which Angel was, once; even then she was all he thought about.  That, and who to kill next.  Those two have story that's just dying to be a made for television movie," she told me once.

Having the whole story really put things into focus.  Oddities and one-liners and in-jokes and offhand references now made sense.  It helped me come to grips with my relationship with Angel.

We were never involved romantically or sexually, we never would have been and never will be.  I know that now, but at one time I had hoped …

Sigh.

Hope.  That's what it all boils down to.  Because of Buffy, the Slayer that is the source of Angel's greatest pain and greatest joy, and his obstinate Childe, Spike, Angel is happy.  He has hope for the future.  Now when we handle a case he gets involved instead of keeping himself completely detached.  He laughs at stupid jokes or funny quips, he gets upset when someone takes his favorite doughnut or scorches the coffee, and he broods less.

He's ready to face the future … whatever it may hold.

I know Spike has some hand in Angel's rise in spirits, but most of it is due to Buffy.  Her mere presence causes lights to dance in his eyes, or a smile to grace his lips.  Even when they argue that light never goes away.

He loves her.  He is in love with her.  His soul is part of hers, for eternity.  No one else can even come close to emulating that bond, except possibly Spike, who is tied to Angel by blood and time and the bond between Sire and Childe.

No wonder Cordelia both loved and hated her at the same time.

She can hurt him terribly … but her love for him overshadows all else.

And he's happy with her.  With them.

I guess that's enough.

So I just trudge on through, doing what I have to do.  It's enough.

It has to be.

The End