Posted to MBTV on 1-18-02

Wendy:
And Ace, maybe it's coincidence, but you seem only to get worked up over Sweeping Generalizations when you happen to disagree with them. A little fair play from the mods would be nice.

Sep:
If Ace and I tried to be any more fair we'd have to give up writing for MBTV and join the circus as contortionists.

Wendy:
You see, herein lies the problem. You think you are being fair. But you are not.

Sep:
When we come across a post that gives us pause, we say something.

Wendy:
And those things that give you pause are usually from those who disagree with you. This makes sense, on one level, but on another, if you are going to take on the job of moderating, then I think it's a job that needs to be done well and fairly.

Sep:
We're not omniscient. We're not here all the time. We can't be. We don't catch every little thing We're not robots. Sometimes the discussion has drifted far enough as to make any moderation attempt outdated or useless. Sometimes issues are addressed in a venue that not everyone is privy to -- email. And finally, yes, we do sometimes make mistakes. See above about our not being robots.

Ace and I spend massive amounts of our free time trying to make these boards run smoothly and remain a pleasant forum that people feel comfortable participating in. As recent events have suggested that is not the case. However, pleasing everyone all the time is an impossible task but every day we try and do the absolute best job that we can. As long as I can go to bed at night and feel like I've given it my best shot that's enough for me.

Wendy:
Interestingly, after saying you bend over backwards to be fair, you give a whole list of reasons explaining why you aren't fair.

If you take on a job, then do it well. Maybe your best isn't good enough, and maybe it's time to consider that. Maybe it's time to take on another moderator to help you with the workload or give up your job to someone who will make the time.

I'm not bothered that people disagree with me. LOL! I have plenty of that in my life, both on and off the net. What does burn me is when people who have power misuse it to try to make the people they disagree with feel small.

There's a point where you have to move beyond "Oh I can't please everyone" to "Wow, more and more people aren't being pleased and, in fact, are leaving MBTV. Is it time to reconsider some of my behaviors?"

Just saying.

After I was banned from MBTV, I wrote the following to Sars, the owner of MBTV on 1-19-02:

To: sars@mightybigtv.com
From: ww1614@yahoo.com

Dear Sars,

I was pretty surprised to find I had been banned from MBTV following my admittedly off-topic post. True, I was engaging in a little civil disobedience, but I had said my piece and was not planning to post further on the issue.

And in fact, I accomplished my objective with one post. If my post made Ace and Sep self-conscious enough over the next few days to refrain from being demeaning and rude to posters they disagree with, then it was well worth the small sacrifice of being banned from a board I rarely posted on anyway. (As a spoiler whore, I tended to avoid the non-spoiler threads because it's difficult to talk about the show with the spoiler-free when you're spoiled several episodes in advance.)

As I said in the post that apparently got me banned, I have no issue with disagreement with my opinions. I do, as people who know me will attest, take strong issue with unfair play and abuse of power. What motivated me to post what I did was not pique at someone who disagreed with me but honest anger at yet another example of the Buffy forum moderators abusing their power as moderators to put down someone they disagree with.

While I understand that to some degree the moderators need to have a kind of absolute power in order to maintain order on the forums, the Buffy board moderators abuse this power again and again. It is one thing to maintain order; it is another to take what seems to be obvious pleasure in trying to make someone feel small. The incident with Drujan angered me in particular because her comment was an incredibly innocuous generalization. It was okay to point out that such generalizations are inappropriate. It is another thing to be condescending and hurtful. Ace was the latter. If you are going to work to make sure the people who post on the board do not abuse others, then you should extend that standard to the moderators as well.

In the coming weeks, the Sex in the Sunnydale thread will become more heated, as episode 13 will feature more sexual material, and it will be controversial in nature. I urge you to keep a close eye on that thread as well as on the moderators to ensure that they moderate in a fair manner. Furthermore, I urge you to consider that this is just one example of an ongoing problem that can be addressed only by you, the owner of the web site and the supervisor of the moderators.

Wendy aka Cobweb