SPIKE: That's how you're gonna fight the forces of evil now? call the I.R.S.?

ANGEL: Whatever it takes.

SPIKE: Hello, I.R.S.? Will you fight my battles for me? And while you're at it, will you wipe my white, spotty... (disappears)

ANGEL: Oh, thank God. (exits)

(Back in Hainsley's chambers)

SPIKE: (reappears) Ass? (to Hainsley) You...

HAINSLEY: Power over the dead. But enough about me. Let's talk about you. You're a ghost. Well, close enough, anyway. That's just a horrible way to be. You're not here, you're not there, just lost, somewhere in the middle. And you can't fight against it. You can't fix it. Hell, you can't even lift a finger 'cause you simply don't have any.

SPIKE: Yeah. What's it to you?

HAINSLEY: I can give you back what's been taken from you—freedom, power of choice. I can put your destiny back in your own flesh-and-bone hands. That's right. A corporeal body. I can make that happen. But to do that, I need you to do something for me. Something that might require...

SPIKE: (enthusiastic) Hurt Angel, that it? You want me to hurt Angel? (grins) You've come to the right ghost.

• Angel & Spike
• Spike's ghosthood

written by: David Fury & Ben Edlund; Original transcript by CariCranberry. Edited & formatted by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season5/transcripts/5x02_tran.php