WILLOW: Ted's got no criminal record! Damn! This guy's like citizen of the year!

XANDER: (eating Ted's cookies) Don't sweat it. It'll be fine.

WILLOW: Don't sweat it?

XANDER: Yeah, cute buddy! We'll work it out! No worries!

CORDELIA: What happened to 'this is killing me'?

XANDER: (shakes his cookie at Cordelia) Worrying isn't gonna solve any problems.

(later, after Willow has examined the cookie)

WILLOW: Okay!

XANDER: What do we know?

WILLOW: Well, apparently the secret ingredient is not love.

XANDER: What is it then?

WILLOW: I'm not positive, but I think it's Dematorin. It's like a tranquilizer, keeps you all mellow and compliant. It also shares a few components with Ecstasy.

XANDER: This is evidence! This is real evidence that Ted was some kind of a crook! Buffy's cleared! Willow, you are the best human ever! I adore you! Well, that's the cookies talkin', but you rock!

CORDELIA: Well, your search finally hit pay dirt. You got some personal records, marriage certificates and an address.

XANDER: Well, let's check it out, get our Slayer back on her feet before somebody else gets hurt.

written by: David Greenwalt & Joss Whedon; Transcribed by: AleXander Thompson. Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/23ted.html