Poobah Says:
I'd go with the obvious television stereotype of "he was black", but I think it's mainly because he dressed better than everyone. Sna-a-a-z-z-y.

From ribbie149:
Is it true that the Bible Code is being used to write this season's episodes of ANGEL?

Poobah Says:
Let's see...
W E D O N T K N O W W H A T W E A R E D O I N G.
Yep, I guess it works.

From mrsmarsters:
Do you actually enjoy living on the East Coast?

Poobah says:
Of course not. Mainly I enjoy living on the coast of unimagined dreams.

From Hippie:
Any ideas on how I can smuggle a very tall French-Canadian across the border and into the US?

Poobah says:
Hmm...very tall? Well, I wouldn't suggest the on-board luggage compartment then. And if Canadians weren't so damned horrid in basketball, I'd tell your tall friend to get an NBA contract. Your best bet is to have him backup Celine Dion in Las Vegas. It ain't pretty, but it'll get him here.

From Dreamer:
If a guy stands under the mistletoe at the office party, a) do I HAVE to kiss him? b) do there have to be tongues? c) if he grabs my ass can I knee him in the nuts?

Poobah says:
A) Yes, it's a rule. B) Yes, it's a rule. C) No, please don't. I was planning on getting mistletoe this year.

From Life's A Show:
WHAT is your name?? WHAT is your *quest*?? WHAT...is your favorite color???

Poobah says:
Most people call me "asshole". My quest is to become the first unknown person on a postage stamp. And dark blue.

From SPIKESMYGOD:
Last night, I was listening to this guy who's an expert on Nostradamus. After interpreting one of his quatrains for this time period, he came to the same conclusion as I: Dr. Phil is the Antichrist. Could this be true?
btw.....Didn't you find him a lot funnier & more light-hearted when he was on "The Larry Sanders Show?"

Poobah says:
I think you're thinking of Jeffrey Tambor. But yes, Dr. Phil could easily be the antichrist. Other picks include his good ol' buddy Oprah, Jerry Bruckheimer, and the Queer Eye for The Straight Guy fellas. I haven't decided who the front runner is yet.

From fiatlux:
I'm in the market for a new laptop; do you have any helpful hints?

Poobah says:
Laptops...Laptops....hmmm....*runs away screaming like a girl*

From Fat Tony:
I'm surrounded by idiots... What should I do?

Poobah says:
Becoming one is always fun. Why don't you try that? It worked for me.

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