Reviewed by Sanguine

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's

Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.

I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;

I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.

I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints, --I love thee with the breath,

Smiles, tears, of all my life! --and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Sonnet from the Portuguese

How does one react when one loses a loved one? That question continued to be considered in this week's episode, "Tough Love," written by relative newcomer Rebecca Rand Kirschner. In previous episodes we saw Buffy and Dawn's reaction to the loss of Joyce, as well as Spike's reaction to Buffy's rejection of him. Buffy shut down emotionally, Dawn tried to raise Joyce from the dead and became a kleptomaniac, and Spike built a Buffy sexbot. Indeed, grief and loneliness drive us to do strange things. This episode explored another character's reaction to grief and loss: Willow. In a season that has only devoted sporadic attention to the Scooby Gang, it was nice to see a Willow-centric episode. Sadly, this episode was flawed in several ways and did not live up to my expectations.

This episode did not pack the emotional wallop of "The Body" or even "Forever" or "Intervention". Some of the dialogue seemed forced, as if Kirschner was trying too hard to be cute. Such was the case in the scene between Giles and Buffy. Buffy has just been told that if she can't control Dawn then she will lose custody of her sister. And yet she seems preternaturally chipper in this scene as she discusses the merits of her stompy foot versus Giles's stompy foot. This exchange just lacked emotional authenticity. Giles's response to Buffy's plight was also strangely off. Giles has been father figure to the two girls for years (well 6 months for Dawn, but I'm sure it's felt like years). But he made it very clear that he was not related to Dawn and therefore Buffy needed to be the one to discipline her. Why is Giles shying away from paternal responsibility where Dawn is concerned? I found this quite puzzling.

A second problem was not entirely Kirschner's fault. Over the course of the season the writers have made occasional attempts to flesh out Tara's character. In "Family" we discovered that she is descended from a long line of rednecks. In "The Body" we learn that she lost her mother at a young age. Unfortunately such attempts at character development were so infrequent that I found myself not really caring that much about Tara or her relationship with Willow. The wiccans' relationship didn't seem real somehow; it functioned more as a political statement than a "real" relationship. Willow and Tara never fought and they rarely showed physical affection thanks to the WB's Victorian sexual sensibilities. Furthermore, while Alyson Hannigan and Amber Benson have become more comfortable with each other, at the beginning of their "romance" their interactions were sometimes painfully awkward. I realise chemistry is in the eye of the beholder, but I honestly never saw it between these two actresses. Thus, when I heard that Tara was going to be brainsucked by Glory, I just couldn't bring myself to care that much.

Willow's lack of empathy sparks the conflict in "Tough Love." Willow criticises Buffy for being too hard on Dawn. Buffy and Willow's relationship continues its downward slide when the Slayer replies that Willow can't possibly understand what she's going through. Buffy is right. Willow has shown a tremendous lack of maturity and empathy over the course of this season. She has demonstrated that she really doesn't understand the repercussions of her actions (her nastiness to Anya and her stealing ingredients for a spell in "Triangle" and her facilitation of Dawn's brush with necromancy in "Forever"). Willow may be intelligent, but in many respects she has a lot to learn. Her subsequent fight with Tara also stems from her lack of empathy and emotional maturity. Willow complains about Buffy's treatment of Dawn, and Tara takes Buffy's side. Willow feels threatened and envious that she can't join the "I have a dead mother club." Not a very desirable club, mind you! Then Tara reveals that she is "frightened" by how far Willow has come with her magic (foreshadowing anyone?). Willow overreacts. Then the clincher: Tara wonders about whether Willow's gayness is genuine. Because Willow changed "teams" so quickly, this was a concern that was also voiced last season by many fans. Willow, in one of the better speeches of the episode, decries identity politics and states that she's sorry that Tara's the only woman with whom she's fallen in love. She has no way of proving her devotion. Unfortunately, she will soon get a chance. Tara leaves and is brainsucked by Glory. Willow now knows what it's like to feel enraged, to want revenge. She unwisely finds a book of "Darkest Magic" (nice that these things are clearly labeled) and goes to fight Glory. Her eyes turn black, just like the potentially evil Doc from "Forever" (hmmmm). She's pretty powerful, but Glory would have killed her had Buffy not intervened. In the final scene of the episode, Willow has reached enlightenment the hard way. She loves Tara selflessly. Her lover is effectively lost to her, and yet she still cares for her. Sometimes we do love "better after death" after we realise what we've lost. Willow now truly understands grief. She understands Buffy.

This episode, while flawed, held a multitude of small pleasures. We discover that not all professors at UC Sunnydale are evil (cf the nasty Rasputin lecturer and Maggie Walsh). Buffy has a nice, understanding poetry professor (and we find out that the Buffster likes poetry--perhaps Spike will write her something perfectly awful someday). Xander got a haircut (thank God, although his hairdresser could have taken a bit more off!). Anya's speeches about the virtues of capitalism were a welcome (at least to this viewer!) and hilarious critique of the current political climate. Giles's / the Ripper's subtle torture of Glory's minion was chilling (did you catch the crack of the minion's hand after he sent the girls' for twine). I want to see more of Giles's dark side and if the rumour I've heard about his potential "adult" series on BBC proves true, I may get my wish. I also appreciated Spike's growing presence in Buffy's life. After "Intervention" she trusts him and even takes his astute advice regarding human nature. Thankfully she listened to him, or Willow might have been brainsucked too. It did make me a bit nervous when Spike made clear that he'd be willing to go on a suicidal revenge mission for the "right person. Person I loved." Yikes! If I didn't know that James Marsters was signed on for next year, I might be worried that Spike was slated to be the sacrificial lamb in the final episode. I just hope they don't pull another Season 2 return from hell-o-rama on us. That would be redundant and lame. It was also nice to see the caring relationship that's developed between Dawn and Spike. He tries to comfort her and reassure her that she's not evil. It's ironic that Spike, who so desperately wants to believe in his own evil nature as recently as "Intervention," is trying to convince Dawn that she isn't evil, not because he disdains evil, but because he realises it would be devastating for her to believe that about herself.

Plot-wise this episode set up the big end of season denouement. We discover that Glory is growing stronger and that Ben is able to take control of the body less and less. Questions are raised about Dawn's nature. Is she evil? Is she good? Is she neutral? Will Buffy lose custody of Dawn? After all, she'll be missing some major school when they have to roadtrip it out of Sunnydale in Spike's RV. What is the affect of brainsucking on the victim? Judging from Glory's threatening yet clue-filled speech, I think that perhaps the Scoobies will find some way to restore Tara to her senses. The goddess describes the insanity caused by her brainsuck as feeling like "you're in a noisy little dark room, naked and ashamed and there are things in the dark that need to hurt you because you're bad. Little pinching things that go in your ears and crawl on the inside of your skull and you know if the noise and crawling would stop that you could remember how to get out. But you never will." Glory sounds as if she is speaking from personal experience. We know that if the goddess does not get a regular brainsuck fix she becomes increasingly looney. Perhaps the key permanently cures Glory and could potentially cure Tara and help her find the exit to the "noisy little dark room." Maybe the "heartwrenching" decision Buffy will have to make will involve a trade off between Tara's sanity and Dawn's life. Oh, and there's also that apocalypse thingy to worry about. So many details! So little time!

Which brings me to my final concern. How on earth will they wrap up all the loose ends in three short episodes? We have the Knights Who Say Key. We have Spike's sudden integration into the Scooby Gang. We have the potentially evil Third Hell God, Doc. We have the mystery of the Key. What is it? What does it do? And finally, and most frivolously, we have a Xander/Anya engagement. The writers have a lot on their plates. I hope they can deliver a posh and tasteful banquet rather than leftover cold pizza.