A Love That Wont Die
Prologue
Every night in my dreams
I see you
I feel you
That is how I know you go on...
--Celine Dion
--My Heart Will Go On
It was well into the evening hours when Buffy finished putting in place what would protect her
during the night. She wearily hung up a string of garlic over her window, then moved to sprinkle holy
water across the sill just in case. Anything that would alert Buffy that her former boyfriend-turned-enemy
was trying to enter.
It still hurt her to think of Angel as such a threat. Prior to when the curse that had made him
good had been lifted, he wouldn't have even considered harming her in the slightest. But, little by little,
as the days passed, she was getting over him. And soon, the time would come when Buffy would have to
kill the man she had once loved dearly.
She stepped away from the window with a sigh, going to her bed and sitting down, a few stray
tears running down her face. After a moment, Buffy slid under the covers, her eyes remaining on the
window until sleep caught her.
The dream started off like most dreams do: white light, a sense of peace. What followed next
was the series of sweet images. Buffy vividly remembered how he had said he loved her, how he had
made love to her so tenderly. But, how could something so poignant cause so much pain, Buffy wondered.
The scene changed then, and Buffy found herself entering the alley where she and her beloved
had first met. She was aware that she was dressed in a long white gown that was vaguely familiar to her.
Slowly, she moved towards one wall, pressing her hand to the cool bricks. And, without warning, she
began to sob, flooded by memories.
(Angel hugging her after one of her nightmares, assuring her that he was alright and that he
would never leave her.)
(His evil persona, Angelus, mocking her with the statement that the worst thing he had done was
pretending to love her.)
Hard to believe that these two were in essence the same person, Buffy mused. One gentle and so
totally devoted, the other harsh and utterly cruel.
"Why?" Buffy whispered to the unforgiving night. "Once more, why did I have to lose him like
this?"
When there was no answer forthcoming, Buffy bowed her head and began to cry. What stopped
her was the warm hand that curled around her shoulder. And, somehow, without even looking up, she
knew who it was, who it had to be.
"I would give anything to take this hurt away," he whispered in that deep voice of his. Her
Angel, the one she loved. There was no mistaking it.
Buffy reached for his hand, bringing it to her face. She closed her eyes and sighed at the feel of
him. Her heart seemed as if it might burst with all the pent-up emotion she felt at this moment. "Oh,
God, Angel, I miss you so much!" she managed to get out. After a slight pause, she added, "Tell me how
I'm supposed to survive without you... There are times when it gets so bad, I wouldn't mind dying myself."
She felt Angel stiffen at her words. His hands were at her shoulders in an instant, turning her
towards him. "Don't," he said firmly. "You're too precious for that, Buffy." He paused, then pulled her to
him in a tight embrace, casting a glance around the alley. "Right here was where I gave you that first
cryptic message. And, right now, I have another for you."
Buffy pulled back, willing herself to look up into his dark brown eyes. "What is it?" she asked
softly.
Angel smiled at her. "Don't give up on us, Buffy... Something's already in motion that will bring
me back to you. Look for an unexpected ally in the next few days, someone who wants the same thing you
do." With that, Angel stepped forward to give her a quick kiss, then began to walk away, like he had that
first night spent here.
"I love you," he offered as a parting remark. "Hold on to that, Buffy... And don't be afraid to
trust the one who'll offer to help you." Angel blew her a kiss, then disappeared into the night. And, for
the first time since her boyfriend had turned on her, Buffy felt a tidal wave of hope come flooding in...
Part One
You and me
I can see us dying... are we?
--Don't Speak
--No Doubt
He would have done anything for her. Live, die, even walk into hell if she asked. And she seemed to
know that with every fiber of her being. She knew a lot more than anyone gave her credit for, as a matter
of fact, despite the outward appearance of having the mind of a child. That was what he adored about her
the most: her vulnerability and the way she had come to depend on him.
So why then, Spike mused, did it seem that with every passing day, the love of his life (or rather, unlife)
was slowly drifting away from him?
He stood silently on the balcony overlooking the main area of the warehouse, half shrouded in shadows.
His hands were wrapped around the wooden railing, his nails digging into it hard enough to leave visible
indents. And all due to the inordinate amount of jealousy he felt at watching an intimate conversation
between his precious Drusilla and Angelus.
Bits and pieces of their conversation drifted up to Spike, but it was enough to make him realize they
were talking over old times. And to top it all off, Drusilla seemed to be enjoying her sire's attention.
Before Angelus had rejoined their side, she wouldn't have given him a moment's thought unless necessary.
At one point, she would even have taken delight in torturing him.
It took all Spike had not to run down there and start a fight when he saw Drusilla step closer to
Angelus, running her hand over his lips. And for a moment, it appeared as if the two were on the verge of
a kiss, much to his disbelief.
Spike looked around frantically for something, anything he
could use to cause a distraction. And his gaze came to rest on the rusted pail to his left. Casually, he gave
it a kick, sending it flying off the balcony. Then, he was away before his two companions could come to
see what had caused the ruckus.
They would assume that it was the Slayer, Spike knew, and Angelus would spend a great deal of time
scouring the warehouse and surrounding area for her. But as long as it kept him and Drusilla apart for
the remainder of the night, it would be worth it.
As he listened to Angelus shouting orders to all the other vampires in the factory, Spike couldn't stop a
smile from coming to his face. Revenge was sweet, he mused, but it could only last so long. Soon, he
wouldn't be here to stop the inevitable, to ensure that Drusilla was his and his alone.
So, there was in essence only one option.
Angelus had to go...
***
Buffy had awoken shortly after her dream ended, and she couldn't get back to sleep for the rest of the
night. That Angel had come to her, that he was telling her there was still hope, seemed to be nothing
short than a miracle.
She could hardly wait to get to school, to tell her friends and her personal mentor about her dream.
They had all been fond of Angel too, and would be overjoyed as well to hear this. Buffy quickly threw on
an outfit that morning, impulsively donning the cross and the leather jacket that her boyfriend had once
given her. If anything, it made her feel all the more closer to him.
She didn't even wait for her mom to offer to drive her, merely grabbed her things and took off running
for Sunnydale High School. She arrived an ample amount of time before the first bell rang, ducking into
the library where she knew at least Giles would be waiting, or so she thought.
The last thing she expected when she entered through the swinging double doors was to catch her two
friends, Willow and Oz, in the middle of a kiss. Buffy stopped short, clearing her throat so they would
notice her.
Willow blushed, wrapping her arms around herself uneasily. "Buffy," she said quietly. "I didn't see
you there."
Buffy smiled slightly, knowing Willow could always be counted on to be modest. She may be breaking
out of her shell as of late, but she still had a long way to go. Oz, on the other hand, was... well, Oz. He
was pretty unique in his own way: sweet, quirky, and just basically fun to be around.
At one point, Buffy had thought herself and Angel to be the oddest couple in Sunnydale (as vampire
and vampire slayer), but Oz and Willow were filling that category quick (as werewolf and human girl).
The Slayer remembered once saying that everyone in her small group of friends was destined to never
have a "normal" relationship. And that was certainly proving true as of late.
With that thought in mind, Buffy asked, "Is Xander around here also?"
Willow nodded. "Hidden in the library stacks somewhere," she muttered.
Buffy smirked. "And let me guess. A certain stuck-up brunette cheerleader that he hates is with him?"
Yet another odd couple, Xander and Cordelia had an intense dislike for each other, but strangely had
developed an attraction because of it.
Willow turned away, looking annoyed. At the same time, Oz took a step forward. "He and Cordelia
have only been up there for twenty minutes. Don't think they want to be interrupted just yet," he
responded. When Buffy gave him a strange look, he added, "I've been keeping tabs, and their make-out
sessions tend to last forty at the most."
Buffy nodded slowly, amused. Meanwhile, anxious to change the subject, Willow said, "Well, what are
you doing here so early? If it's to see Giles, he just stepped out a while ago. Our esteemed principal
wanted to have a talk with him."
Buffy sighed, debating a moment over whether or not to share the dream she had. "Oh, well," she said
at last. "I was gonna save this in my mental cabinet of things to tell Giles, but I really can't wait... I had
this dream last night..."
Buffy didn't get a chance to finish, as she heard the library doors swing open behind her. She didn't
need to look to see who had just entered; she could see it in Willow's eyes. Instinctively, Buffy stiffened,
not bothering to hide her dislike for the uninvited guest.
Jenny Calender. Computer science teacher, self-proclaimed technopagan, and a descendant of the
Gypsy tribe that had cursed Angel once upon a time. Next to Buffy, she was the most directly responsible
for him reverting to his evil ways. Jenny had been ordered by her tribe to keep the vampire and the Slayer
apart, but, consequently, she hadn't tried hard enough. Maybe if she had, Buffy mused, this whole mess
never would have happened.
Jenny stopped upon seeing that Buffy was here. The two women had been avoiding each other as of
late; perhaps it was inevitable that they'd run into one another again. After an awkward moment of
silence, Jenny said, "I was hoping to speak with Giles... Is he here?"
"No," Buffy said coldly, without turning. "Even if he was, he'd have nothing to say to you... After you
lied to him, to all of us..."
Had Buffy bothered to look, she would have seen Jenny's eyes flood with tears. "Buffy, I can't apologize
enough for that," she said sincerely. "If I could go back and relive that night, I would. I would do
anything to alter what happened!"
Buffy felt a lump forming in her throat. "I'm sure you would have," she said flatly, refusing to let go of
the anger she felt. "But you missed that chance... If you had just been honest with us..."
Jenny hesitated a moment, exchanging glances with Willow and Oz. "I don't expect either you or Giles
to ever trust me again," she said softly. "But I hope that you can one day find it in your hearts to forgive
me." She moved to leave, then stopped and turned back. "I know what it's like to lose someone you love,
Buffy," Jenny said as an afterthought. Then, without waiting for a response, she was gone.
Buffy stood there for a long while, deep in thought. She couldn't say exactly how or why the idea came
to her, but it was there. She remembered her dream, how Angel had told her not to distrust the one who
would help her. And, right now, she could only think of one person who might fill that role.
Jenny! Buffy thought. It had to be her. So, unaware that Willow was asking if she was alright, that
Xander and Cordy had just stumbled into sight at last, Buffy turned and left the library, wanting to be
alone with her thoughts at the moment...
***
Buffy didn't know how she made it through the day. Nothing seemed to matter, not her classes, not
having lunch with her friends, not even taking the time to ask Giles if he foresaw any new catastrophes for
her. All she could think about was Angel, Jenny, and her dream.
Thus the reason she stopped by Ms. Calender's room immediately after school, waiting in the hallway
until she was certain everyone but the computer teacher had left. Once that had happened, Buffy quietly
stepped in, shutting the door behind her.
"You said once that you couldn't do anything to help Angel," Buffy said aloud, startling Jenny. "Does
that still stand? Or has something changed since then?"
For a moment, Jenny was too surprised by the Slayer's appearance to answer. Finally, she stood,
leaning forward with both palms flat on her desk. "What makes you think anything has?" she asked
softly. "If there was anything I could do, I would have done it already."
Buffy sighed, relating her vision from last night. "And you and I both know my dreams have a
tendency to come true," she added. "So, if I'm supposed to look for someone I don't exactly trust, and it's
not you, then who is it?"
Jenny shrugged, hating to see Buffy getting so worked up over this. "I don't know," she whispered. "I
wish I could tell you. But I'm as much in the dark as you are."
The Gypsy sighed, walking around the desk and meeting Buffy eye to eye. "I sometimes think it would
have been better if we'd never gotten close, that I'd never grown to care about you, about Giles... I was
supposed to hate Angel for the crimes he committed against my tribe. But when I saw how much he
meant to you and vice versa... Especially when he saved my life, I was ready to give up on this act of
vengeance! You have to believe that, Buffy."
The Slayer sighed deeply. "So, prove it," she said slowly. "Do what you can to help! I don't care what,
but just find something!" With that, Buffy turned to exit the room, her disappointment falling in on her
once more...
Part Two
Nobody's touch feels like your touch
Nobody gets to me that much
Nobody's kiss moves me inside
And I have no place left to hide
Tell me, what can I do
With this vision of you...
--Belinda Carlisle
--Vision of You
She went through her usual after-school meeting with Giles in a sort of daze, not really focusing
on anything he was telling her. All Buffy could do was stare blankly at the table before her, lost in her
thoughts.
She didn't know exactly how long she remained this way, but was startled when there was a loud
thud on the desk before her, as Giles deliberately dropped the large volume he'd been carrying. With a
yelp, Buffy snapped alert, looking up at him with wide eyes.
"I give up," Giles commented in his familiar British accent, sitting across from her. "Your mind
hasn't been here all afternoon... Do you care to tell me what's going on, or shall I guess?"
Buffy sighed, wondering why she hadn't just come right out and told Giles about her dream.
Maybe at the risk that he would say something to dash her hopes, she had been afraid to. But that fear
was receding quickly now.
Buffy kept her description brief, merely told Giles of the message Angel had given her. Once she
had finished, her Watcher did exactly what she had expected him to.
"Buffy," Giles started. "I know you miss Angel, and it's no surprise that you'd be having dreams
like this... But it can't be real, no matter how much we wish it." Giles paused, removing his glasses to
clean them on his shirt. "And, in light of how close we're getting to doing away with Angelus, I'd hate to
see you go through a setback."
Buffy paused, tears stinging her eyes. "I'm well aware of that," she said softly. "But, Giles, what
if there is a way? This can't have been just a normal dream. There must be some way to reinstate the
curse, something we haven't thought of!"
He stared at her in silence a moment, his expression one of quiet concern. But something told
Giles not to discard her beliefs so easily. "I don't see how though," he said. "All help died at the same
time Jenny's uncle did. He may have been the only one who knew the mechanics of how it was done,
other than the rest of the tribe. And I somehow doubt they'd want to help us."
Buffy hadn't considered that aspect earlier, but she did now. "So who else is left?" she whispered
thoughtfully, fingering the cross around her neck. After a while, she stood in frustration, pacing back and
forth. "This is going to drive me crazy," she said aloud. "Just once, I wish Angel would drop the cryptic
wiseguy act."
Giles chose not to comment on the fact that she had just referred to her vision as being real; it
would only work to upset her. But, before he could say anything further on the subject, Willow breezed
into the library, serving as a reminder that it was time the three of them retreated to home before nightfall.
With that, the Slayer and the Watcher disbanded for the day...
***
Just as always, Buffy was reluctant to leave home and leave her mother open to an attack that
evening. But eventually, she decided that being inside was no safer than being outdoors. All she could do
was leave the usual defenses at her windowsill upon sneaking out.
She went to the cemetary first, deciding it would be the best place to start. Since her boyfriend
had turned, it seemed that more and more new vampires were popping up here each night. She
dispatched of at least two, then after a while, continued on her way.
Buffy was halfway between the Bronze (Sunnydale's famous dance club) and Willow's house
when the attack came. She wasn't aware of Angelus until he was right on top of her, his proximity
making her neck hairs bristle.
Buffy gasped when his hands rested on her bare arms, invoking unwanted memories of happier
times. And her anger and fear only increased when he leaned closer to whisper in her ear.
"Don't be so tense, Buffy. I'm not here to hurt you... Well, not yet anyway," he cackled, his words
and tone giving her imagination a workout. "Maybe you and I could have a little fun first. Like maybe
another one-night stand."
Buffy gritted her teeth. It infuriated her that Angelus could be this cruel, using the passionate
evening she and Angel had shared to continually wound her. But it wouldn't work this time, she vowed.
She bent over slightly, flinging one arm behind her to grab hold of his shirt and flip him over onto the
ground.
Except that he wore no shirt. Buffy was shocked when her hand came in contact with his bare
chest, which only served to make him laugh. She let out a cry, breaking from Angelus' grip and turning
to look at him.
Buffy wanted to hate him for this, but the moment her eyes rested on his face, on his muscular
frame, all her rage seemed to deflate. Strange that after she had worked hard at trying to forget, he could
still have this affect on her. And the rotten thing was, Angelus knew it and continued to flaunt it.
"You're so easy to please, it's unbelievable," he said with a laugh, mocking her once more. "Let's
face it, Buffy... You're never going to get rid of me, so why bother trying? We could just put our
differences aside and enjoy a few more rolls in the hay."
"Drop dead!" she quipped. "Oh, no, wait. Perhaps a more appropriate comeback would be, 'eat
dust'. Cause that's all that will be left of your followers when I'm through with them. And it won't be
long before you follow in their scattered remains."
Angelus merely smirked, once more showing how much he underestimated her. "In your
dreams, girlfriend," he replied, sounding quite self-assured. And seconds later, he was gone, leaving
Buffy wishing she had staked him when she had the chance.
She waited a few moments before turning to leave. But she hadn't even made it halfway home
when she became aware she was being followed. With a sigh of exasperation, Buffy stopped, one hand
reaching under her jacket sleeve for a stake. "Let's make this quick, shall we?" she said loudly. "I have a
curfew."
"Spare me your delightful little sense of humor," said a very familiar voice. With a start, Buffy
turned to look at Spike. The last time she had seen the platinum-haired vampire, he had been wheelchair-
bound, recovering from injuries she had personally inflicted on him. But that had passed; Buffy could see
that he had healed quite nicely.
"At least I get to fight with one of the big fishes for a change," Buffy said with a shrug, adopting
a fighting stance. Spike was definitely a very big fish, and she looked forward to taking him down. And
right now, she was all prepared to take him on in a battle to the death, preferably his. "Like I said, let's
make this quick," she added dryly.
Spike smirked, crossing his arms in amusement. "Really, Slayer, I don't think you'll want to get
rid of me that quickly," he replied, sounding slightly bored.
"And why's that, dare I ask?" Buffy questioned.
His next words shocked her, for they were the last thing she expected to hear from Spike's lips.
"Because if you do, all chance of getting your precious Angel back will fly right out the window," he
answered...
Chapter Three
Author's Notes: Thanks to the efforts of a friend of mine (Becca), I was able to complete this section of
the story with no problem. She wrote the majority of the scene between Spike and Drusilla and deserves
all the credit for it. From this point on, she and I will be co-writing the story, and we both hope you find
it enjoyable. Thank you.
Breaking all the rules when we get together
Anything at all, are you ready to do?
--Breaking All The Rules
--She Moves
For a long moment, all Buffy could do was stare at Spike in disbelief, refusing to drop her
fighting stance in case this was a trick. Finally, she found the courage to speak. "Let me get this straight.
You're offering to help me see that Angel is cursed again?" she said slowly.
He scoffed at this, shaking his platinum blonde head. "The last time I checked, I wasn't speaking
in tongues," Spike answered sarcastically. "I think I made myself quite clear."
Buffy remained silent for another moment. "This is coming from a vampire who killed two
Slayers in his lifetime," she answered ironically. "Now, you want to play 'Let's Make A Deal' with one?"
Spike shrugged. "What can I say? Angel gets on my nerves, and this is the only way to get him
out of the picture short of killing him."
Buffy eyed him curiously, still not quite trusting him. And, despite Angel's promise to her in her
dream the night before, she couldn't stop from voicing her next question. "Why don't you, Spike? If you
took him out, it would save us both the trouble of an alliance."
Spike sighed, deciding that the best way to break through this Slayer's defenses was to tell her the
whole truth. He leaned against the lamppost behind him, a smirk on his face. Here's the scenario... Your
boyfriend..."
Buffy cut in with, "He's NOT my boyfriend!"
Spike went on as if she hadn't spoken, though it pleased him somewhat to have struck a nerve
with her. "Your boyfriend," he emphasized, "is too well guarded now for me to risk killing him. If I did
that, I'd have a dozen of the locals breathing down my neck... Angel's their leader now, and they'd do
anything to avenge him if it came to that. But if he were to turn to your side once more... That's a
different story."
Buffy was still doubtful though. "Why?" she asked. "What's in it for you, Spike?"
"Drusilla," he answered simply. "If things go on the way they are now, I run the risk of losing
her to Angelus. And, basically, I'm hardly in the mood to share what's mine... Think back, Slayer. You
know I would do anything to keep her around."
Buffy knew he spoke the truth; Spike had proved that more than once in the past. "Okay, so
you've made your point," she said slowly. "But what do you expect, Spike? I'm not about to jump into this
little scheme of yours willingly."
Spike smirked again. "I figured you wouldn't. That's why I'll give you some time to think it
over. We'll meet in that dance club of yours tomorrow night, and you can give me your answer then."
Buffy hesitated a moment, then slowly nodded. Twenty-four hours ought to be enough time to
think it over, she reasoned. She watched Spike retreat and disappear into the darkness before she finally
let her guard down.
A part of her wanted to shout out what now that she would do it, but her more cautious side won
the fight. This was hardly the time to act impetuously. But it surprised her that she was even considering
joining forces with the enemy.
What if it was just a ploy on Spike's part, Buffy wondered as she started for home, something that
would definitely insure her demise? She recalled once more what Angel had said in her dream.
"'Don't be afraid to trust,'" Buffy whispered, tears springing to her eyes. "Oh, Angel. Do I dare
go to these lengths? Is it worth the risk?" But, much as she craved an answer, there was none
forthcoming. All she had to go on now was instinct, and what would be a great leap of faith...
***
As Spike walked home, he thought about what he'd done. Who would have thought that he
would offer to join forces with his greatest enemy, in a plan to defeat his oldest and best friend? Who
would have thought. But he'd do anything for Dru, and even if she didn't know he was doing it, even if
she didn't want him to, he'd do anything to keep her his. He could only hope that she didn't have another
of those visions that would clue her in.
Over the years, Spike had been described.as ruthless, uncaring, and selfish. He was described as
nearly indestructable, for he had no emotion, and therefore, no weakness. That was only partially true.
He was ruthless, but he cared for one thing only. He had only one weakness, and that was Drusilla. Over
the years, he'd begun to actually care for her, and not just take out the actions. He actually enjoyed taking
care of her, and had gone to extreme lengths to make her happy.
But now that she was well, and now that she was happy, Spike was beginning to doubt his
actions. What if in allowing Angel to come back to the fold, he had ensured the loss of the only thing he
loved? Well, he just couldn't let that happen. And in 24 hours, he'd find out if he would be able to keep
what was his.
Spike's feet had led him home, and as he walked into the warehouse, he was surprised to see
Drusilla, alone, lying in their bed.
"Dru! Why aren't you out hunting with Angelus?" Spike questioned, finishing the last part with
a sneer.
"Love! I'm so glad you're here! I was beginning to be worried about you, your being sick and all.
What kind of a mummy would I be, if I let you get hurt?"
Spike sighed, slightly annoyed by the ways she tended to avoid giving a straight answer.
"Drusilla, you didn't answer my question."
"Angel wanted to hurt the Slayer, so he went off looking for her. He told me I'd only get in the
way," she finished with a whimper.
"Dru, how could he say that? You could never get in the way! And I'm surprised he was so cruel
to you, you two seem to be getting awfully close these days. Would you rather I leave, so I'm not in
YOUR way?" The last part of the sentance was untrue... nothing could ever make him leave her side,
absolutely nothing.
"Spike, are you getting angry? Angel is my sire, we're catching up on old times. I love you, love.
You know that. So what's the problem?"
"The bloody problem is," Spike began, sauntering up to Drusilla, "that you two seem to be getting
awfully bloody close! You know he wants you, Dru. And you're not making it easy for me to watch you
respond to him! You bloody decide now which of us you prefer, or just tell me to leave!"
"Spike, love," Drusilla said, as she leaned in closer to Spike, "You wound me with your words.
The air, it's telling me to hurt you, for hurting me. The trees, they whisper of your death. Shhhhh. I
won't listen to them... this time. After all, my pet, you've done so much for me in the past. But if you hurt
me again... shhhh. Let's not talk now, love. I've missed you."
And Spike, playing the fool, let her go. He let himself be pushed around, so she would have the
best of both worlds. After all, he really couldn't deny her anything. But one day... one day, when he had
his strength up, he would be able to tell her, and really command her. One day, if it came to that, he
WOULD kill Angelus his own bloody self. If that slayer didn't help him, he'd risk his own life to keep
Drusilla his...
***
Once more, Buffy faced another sleepless night. Funny, she mused at one point, that all the
vampires in my life are having that effect on me as of late. First Angel, now Spike. The thought made
her giggle out loud, and she had to automatically cover her lips lest her mother hear her.
Surprisingly, the evening passed quickly, but Buffy had come no closer to a decision on Spike's
offer. Perhaps if she talked objectively to someone about it...
But who was there that she could tell without raising a fuss. Xander plainly hated Angel, and
would be less than pleased to hear she was considering making an alliance with Spike. Giles and Jenny
would be too concerned about the risks that were involved to be rational. Willow was too sensitive about
the issue to offer an objective opinion; her emotions took charge most of the time. And Cordelia... would
be more worried about her hair and giving out fashion tips.
With a start, Buffy realized there was someone who hadn't been a part of the group long enough
to form an emotional judgment of the issue. And, under normal circumstances, it was the last person she would have considered going to for advice.
But now it was confirmed. She and Oz were about to have a serious, private talk...
Part Four
If you're lonely and need a friend
And troubles seem like they never end
Just remember to keep the faith
And love will be there to light the way...
-- Mariah Carey
-- Anytime You Need A Friend
Tracking down Oz at school proved to be no problem, Buffy soon found. The real difficulty lay
in tearing him away from Willow long enough to talk to him. In fact, it wasn't until lunch time that Buffy
found the opportunity.
She hid in an empty classroom down the hall from Oz's locker, waiting until he walked past to
put a few books away. Buffy looked quickly to make sure no one was watching, then called his name
softly, catching his attention.
"Buffy, hi," Oz said, turning towards her. "Willow was just looking for you..."
Buffy interrupted him. "That can wait," she said hurriedly. "I need to talk to you... in private.
Do you got a minute?"
He hesitated, then nodded, walking into the room and watching as she shut the door behind
them. "Just as long as you promise there are no surprises," Oz added quickly.
Buffy looked at him strangely. "Surprises?" she asked.
Oz gave her a nervous smile. "It's just... If I recall, the first time we met one-on-one, you pinned
me to a wall. Second time, you didn't have any clothes on..."
Buffy blushed, slightly embarrassed by both memories. The first had been due to a
misunderstanding (she believed Oz had been about to attack her at the time), and the second... was
basically the result of a witch's spell gone horribly wrong. "I promise, no surprises," she said with a goofy
grin, assuring both him and herself. "I just need some advice."
Oz moved to half sit on one of the desks. "Ok," he replied, being totally cool by not questioning
why. "Shoot."
Buffy paused a moment, unsure how to start. Finally, she said, "How much did Willow tell you
about that guy I was seeing, Angel?"
Oz sighed. "Basically that he used to be a good vampire, but something happened to turn him
bad... Well, and she mentioned that you were pretty close to him," he replied, looking slightly
uncomfortable.
Buffy sighed deeply, leaning against the doorframe with a pained look in her eyes. "I was madly
in love with him, to be honest," she admitted. "And ironically, it was that love that destroyed everything
Angel and I had." She looked at Oz, quickly filling him in on her dream, Spike, and his offer. "There's a
chance that I can make it right, but there are so many risks involved in such a scheme... What I was
hoping for was that you could offer an objective opinion as to what I should do..."
Oz remained silent for the longest time, contemplating all this. "Has this Spike guy given you
any reason to trust him?"
Buffy shrugged. "Besides not attacking me last night? No. In fact, there's no reason I should
other than that dream I had."
"But you want to now?"
Buffy sighed once more. "I do, Oz. I really do want to believe him. But I could be setting
myself up to get killed if I do!"
Oz thought a moment longer. "So, you have a choice between getting back the guy you love the
most or your own personal safety... Which sounds more appealing to you?" he said at last, summing it up
in the best way possible.
Buffy shook her head. "I don't know," she moaned, letting her gaze wander a moment. "What
would you do in my place? If it were Willow you had a chance to save at your own risk? What choice
would you make?"
Oz remained silent once more, deep in thought. Finally, he said, "I'd choose Willow. To hell
with the danger involved... If there was a way, I'd take it. I owe her that."
Buffy nodded, tears in her eyes. "I would too," she said softly, looking downward. "Anything for
Angel..." Looking up at Oz again, she said, "Thank you... Just one thing. Don't tell Xander, Willow, or
anyone else that we had this talk. They'd only try to stop me from carrying it out."
Oz nodded. "But you mentioned that you're meeting Spike tonight at the Bronze. How are either
of you planning to explain it away to your respective friends?"
Buffy paused a moment, then shrugged. "By being creative," she said simply, a mischievous
glint in her eyes...
***
It was near dawn, and as Angelus came home from the hunt, he saw a disturbing sight. Drusilla
and Spike were together in the center of the warehouse, talking and being totally affectionate.
Angelus watched as Spike leaned over to tenderly stroke Drusilla's cheek, watched as he bent
down to kiss her. Drusilla looked Spike in the eye, about to say something, when she noticed Angelus.
"My Angel! You're back! Did you have fun, my pet?" she asked, abandoning her perch on the
table and walking slowly closer to her sire's side. "Was the hunt good?" she whispered seductively,
drawing closer still.
Drusilla was so close, that Angelus would have been able to feel her breath. He cast a glance at
Spike over her shoulder, giving the blonde vampire a smug smile he was sure would invoke jealousy.
Leaning closer, Dru whispered in his ear, "I hope you had a good time. You left me and Miss Edith all by
ourselves. You left us!" With that, she slapped him playfully. Knowing his weak point, she played her
offense accordingly. "Good thing my Spike was here. He kept me... entertained." And with a final coy
smile, she sauntered back to Spike.
Angelus wasn't about to lose out on this one though. "Dru! I'm so sorry I was mean to you!"
Saying that, he began walking towards the pair. "Next time, I'll bring you with me and we'll have a good
time playing with the Slayer. What do you say, please?"
Drusilla cast a pleased look at him. "Why, Angel," she said. "You do know the way to a girl's
heart... Tell Drusy what good games she can play."
Angelus smiled, glad he had gotten her attention. "You can work on your spells, Dru. You're
practically the only one left who knows that ancient gypsy art... I'm sure that even that computer bitch
doesn't know half the old magicks that you do. The Slayer won't even know what hit her!"
Seeing Spike open his mouth as if to try and object, Angelus quickly continued, "Don't worry
about roller boy... we'll feed him scraps if he's good!"
"Now wait a bloody minute!" Spike angrily began, walking over to Angelus. "Let me remind you
that not only am I OUT of my wheelchair, but no longer in need of your `services'. Besides... Dru already
has plans. You remember, pet? You said you'd help me hunt! Remember all the fun we had? Vienna?
The fire? Oh... the blood... it was sweet as wine. What do you say we throw you another party? Let's
make this town burn!!!" Spike finished, trying to make his offer sound more appealing.
"You'll never learn, will you?" asked Angelus, sauntering closer. "The student can NEVER beat
the teacher. Why would anyone choose the servant, when they can have the master? Why would Drusilla
choose you, when I'm the one who taught you?!" Utterly confident, and completely arrogant, Angelus
offered, "Unless you're scared, why don't we let Dru decide?"
Like a bee to honey, Drusilla drew nearer to Angelus. She slowly drew her hand around the back
of his neck, making a slight cut. She leaned down to slowly lick the blood that welled forth, and smiled at
him.
Spike gave up at this point, merely watched as they spent the day flirting. He watched as
Drusilla grew more and more fond of her sire, helpless as she slowly slipped away.
"I really need that damn Slayer to agree to the deal. Hell, I'll do anything. Just please, don't let
me lose her. Don't make me let go." For the first time in his entire life, Spike prayed. He wished, he
begged, he prayed; not really caring WHO heard, just wanting his request to be granted. He stayed there
for hours, alternately thinking, crying, and praying. And he barely noticed as the sun began to sink lower
and lower in the sky...
Part Five
I don't want to wait for our lives to be over
I want to know right now - What will it be?
I don't want to wait for our lives to be over
Will it be yes or will it be sorry?
--I Don't Want To Wait
--Paula Cole
Spending their nights at the Bronze had pretty much become a tradition for Buffy and her
friends. However, she hadn't come here as often since Angel had changed; it had invoked too many
painful memories. But now, knowing she had a chance to get him back, she didn't mind so much.
She sat alone with Xander and Cordelia at their usual table, but she might as well have been by
herself considering the kissfest these two were having. On any other day, Buffy would have been half
watching them enviously, but now she kept throwing glances around to see if Spike had arrived yet.
Impatiently, Buffy checked her watch for about the millionth time. "God, where is he?" she
muttered under her breath.
Almost instantly, Spike was right behind her, providing a whispered answer. "Detaining our
significant others," he said, startling her. "Right now, they're looking for you over at the cemetary thanks
to a forged note I provided."
Buffy gasped at his sudden appearance, alerting Xander. With wide eyes, her friend moved to
get up, but Spike warned him back into his seat by wrapping one hand around Buffy's throat. "Don't make
me do something she'll regret," Spike threatened. "All I want is just one dance with your Slayer, and I'll
leave."
"Over my dead body," Xander said defiantly, while Cordelia stared on in fright. Buffy
understood how they felt; if not for last night's events, she would be equally scared herself.
However, now was not the time for her friend to try and be heroic. "Xander, don't," Buffy said
abruptly. "I don't want any trouble. I'll just do what he wants." When Spike loosened his grip, she stood,
escorting the platinum blonde vampire to the dance floor.
It amazed Buffy that she was being so calm about this. How many times had she and Spike
gotten into some fight or another? Too many to count, she reasoned. Why then was she about to dance
with him without question, without fear?
How ironic, Buffy mused as she felt Spike put his arms around her casually, her own sliding
awkwardly around him. This is just the sort of thing I always wished Angel and I could do together, even
initially after he turned bad. I have got to drop this new fascination with the guys who I'm supposed to be
fighting.
"What do you think you're doing?" Buffy hissed once she and Spike were alone, swaying in time
to the slow song that was playing. "Are you out of your mind? We could have met outside! All you had
to do was signal me!"
Spike couldn't stop a slight growl from escaping his lips. "Too many ears, Slayer, both out there
and in here," he replied. "Your friends and mine can't have any clue of what we're up to, remember?" He
stared down into her angry green eyes, feeling it was all he could do not to shove her away and bolt. Up
until now, it had only been Drusilla who he had dared to drag into this activity. And just being near Buffy
on this level was disturbing him, making him extraordinarily restless. And, according to her body
language, she felt much the same way. "Plus, this should make it appear we're still at odds, tense as we
both are..."
Buffy nodded slightly, realizing he was right. "You have a point," she admitted in a whisper.
"Okay, so what now?"
Spike looked towards the table where her friends sat. The young man, Xander, was now rifling
through her bag, perhaps for a crucifix, so their time to talk was severly limited. "Your answer... What is
it, Slayer?"
Buffy blinked her eyes once. "I'll do it!" she replied. "I'll do anything. Just tell me what the plan
is!"
Spike shook his head, noticing that Xander had found the cross and was heading in their
direction. "Later," he offered hastily. "Things are too hairy here. I'll be at your place around midnight or
so."
Buffy reeled back slightly in astonishment. How did Spike know where she lived, let alone get a
sample of her writing to make a forgery? But, much as she wanted to ask him, she was startled when he
suddenly disappeared on her. "I hate when they do that," she muttered, looking towards Xander and
anticipating a few minutes of contrived assurances for his benefit...
***
True to his word, Spike showed up outside her bedroom window later that night, just as she was
preparing to go to bed. Buffy nearly screamed at his sudden appearance, but stifled it just in time. She
rubbed at her eyes, trying to calm her nerves, then stood and walked closer. "You have got to stop doing
that!" she admonished him, glad she wasn't wearing anything too revealing.
Spike scowled. "If you really want my help, Slayer, I'd say you should drop this attitude of
yours," he retorted. "If not, maybe I'll just leave right now!"
Buffy groaned slightly. "Okay... So what is your great plan for restoring Angel's soul, Almighty
One?" she replied calmly, her wit shining through.
Spike grinned. "I see Angel never did bother to tell you what really happened to that gypsy girl
he killed. That's so like him... If he had, you would have put the pieces together on your own."
Buffy rolled her eyes. "What are you blabbering about?"
"Drusilla," Spike said, "is the result of a Romani girl who Angel turned into a vampire. She is
the reason he was cursed in the first place, and she alone retains all knowledge of the exact spells that
were used. Only she can change him back."
Buffy's eyes widened. "I see... And you needed me for this why? You could have talked her into
it on your own."
Spike sighed, surprised by how dense she was. But, before he could answer, he noticed the
bedroom door behind her opening, her mother's voice asking if Buffy was alright. Spike hissed an
expletive before diving out of sight, hiding to one side of the window.
"I thought I heard voices," Joyce said, studying her daughter's mask of wide-eyed innocence.
"What are you still doing up? It's almost one in the morning, Buffy."
Buffy's mind scrambled for an acceptable answer. "I... I was just..." she stammered, her eyes
darting downwards. Quickly, she picked up one of her stuffed animals from the floor. "I couldn't get to
sleep without Mr. Gordo," she replied with a silly smile, standing and hugging the stuffed pig to her chest.
Joyce gave her daughter a strange look. "I swear sometimes, I don't know what gets into you,"
she answered with a note of amusement, stepping forward to embrace Buffy and give her a kiss on the
forehead. "Sweet dreams, honey," she said, walking from the room and shutting the door behind her.
Buffy breathed a sigh of relief, turning back towards the open window. She waited a moment,
then gently called out Spike's name, taking a few steps closer.
He moved back into view almost instantaneously, wearing an amused smile. "Mr. Gordo?" he
asked ironically.
Buffy threw him a murderous look, tossing the pig onto her bed. "Shut up!" she snapped,
making sure to keep her voice down. "Now, where were we before we were interrupted?"
Spike sighed. "Use your head, Slayer! Drusilla won't cast this kind of spell for my benefit, no
matter how much I try to persuade her. It would only make her suspicious and then where would we be?
No, what we have to do is force her hand in this."
Buffy's eyes gleamed in understanding, thinking she knew what he had in mind. Spike
confirmed it for her by saying, "Like it or not, we have no other choice. By working together, I believe we
might just pull this off."
Buffy nodded. "Well, tonight probably wouldn't be workable," she replied, "seeing as how it's
half over already... Okay, meet me in the park tomorrow evening. And within two hours of that appointed
time, all our problems will be solved..."
Part six
I have found a dream that must come true,
Every ounce of me must see it though...
--Immortality
--Celine Dion
Buffy didn't even bother trying to get to sleep that night, knowing she was too keyed up to
manage it anyway. She merely had to feign it once when her mother came in to check on her. But
finally, towards the early morning hours, her weariness caught up with her.
This dream found her in the bedroom in Angel's apartment. It was set up on the night she had
awoken to find him gone, the night his soul had been lost. Everything was essentially the same: the
empty room, the soft patter of the rain on the window, the soft velvet covers against her body. Even
though it should invoke the pain she'd experienced, Buffy could only feel happy now.
She propped herself up, gazing out into the room and hugging the blankets to her chest.
"Angel?" she called. A pause, then, "There's no use hiding. I know you're there."
He stepped from the shadows with a wry smile, clothed only in some black trousers. He walked
to Buffy, kneeling on the mattress and holding her to him. "This is how it should have gone that night, if
we'd been given a choice," Angel murmured. "But we can't turn back the clock... All we have now is a
chance to make it right."
Buffy pulled back, gazing up at him. "Does that mean I should trust Spike? There's a part of me
that's still wary, Angel."
"He won't do anything to betray you, no matter how bad it may get, Buffy," Angel whispered, still
holding her. "I can't promise that the next twenty-four hours will be easy... but just think of what the end
result will be."
Buffy nodded tearfully, planting a kiss on his lips. "Just promise me this... Say we'll still have a
chance, Angel, after this is over."
He shook his head painfully. But, even though he knew it was a lie, he finally managed to say, "I
promise... Oh, Buffy! Never forget how much I love you!"
Just then, her alarm went off, but not before she stated that she loved him too. Sitting up in her
own bed, shaking off her lethargy, Buffy gently touched her lips, swearing she could still feel his kiss.
After a moment of reflection, she stood, moving to get dressed for school...
***
The last thing Buffy expected when she entered the library that day for her free period was a
stern lecture from Giles. But nonetheless, he had an earful for her. "Why did you not check in last
night?" Giles asked. "You had me worried that something had happened!"
Buffy shrugged. "Nope, I'm fine," she answered. "There were only one or two new vampires
rising, and I took care of them easy. No Angelus activity, so that's a plus."
Giles paused, waiting to see if she'd go on. "And Spike? Where would he fit in?" the Watcher
questioned when she remained silent. "Xander tells me that he showed up at the Bronze last night and
threatened you."
Buffy began to fidget uncomfortably. "Well," she started. "That was... That..." She broke off, at
a loss for words.
Giles took a step closer, crossing his arms. "Funny how you failed to mention that encounter...
Or did you decide not to on the chance I'd be concerned?"
Buffy paused a moment, considering. She took a few steps into the room, sitting atop the table.
"The second one," she answered. "Giles, it's not that big a deal. Spike poses no threat whatsoever."
He walked closer, looking anything but amused. "This is serious, Buffy," he said. "Not only has
Spike killed two Slayers, but he is fully recovered now and he is intimidating you. On top of our problems
with Angelus' harassment... It's best that you be prepared for this. These two know you too well, and
combined with Drusilla, they could very well be your downfall."
Buffy sighed, rubbing at her eyes and wishing desperately that she could tell him the truth.
"Giles, I know that," she replied. "But I can handle it. I've had no problem before, and there shouldn't be
any now."
Giles took a step back, looking stern. "You're right," he replied. "It won't be a problem because I
want you here right after school for training... This is not to be taken lightly, Buffy, and I refuse to do just
that, no matter what you think." He paused, glancing at the clock. "Well, I have a faculty meeting to get
to. I'll see you after school."
Buffy groaned, sinking down into a chair. "Oh, great!" she muttered. "Spike, I am seriously
going to kill you for this..."
***
Back at the warehouse, Spike was having just as much, if not more, trouble than her. He had
been expecting a quiet day while he waited for the time when the plan would be put into motion.
However, such was not the case, he learned when Angelus came after him in a rage.
Before Spike knew what was happening, his sire had him pinned to a wall, looking angry enough
to kill. "How dare you!" Angelus growled, as Drusilla entered meekly behind him, cradling one of her
dolls.
Spike froze for a moment, his first thought being that these two had figured out what he was
planning. But how? Out loud, he asked, "Something wrong, mate?"
Angelus gave a slight snarl. "What's this I hear about you going after the Slayer last night?!" he
snapped. "When you know she's off limits to anyone but me?!"
Spike really had to fight back an amused smile at this. "Since when did you start getting
territorial about our prey?" he asked in good measure.
"Since dear Buffy and I established a connection," Angelus answered, calming slightly. "She's
mine to play with, Spike. Not yours and not Dru's."
Behind him, Drusilla pouted, whining ever so slightly. Nevertheless, Angelus heard it and
turned to look at her. An instant later, he released Spike and took a step towards her. "I'm sorry, baby,"
he crooned to her, laying one hand on her shoulder. "I didn't mean it that way."
Spike stared at the two of them in disbelief. "Then exactly how did you mean it?" he questioned,
totally annoyed. "And why change the rules just to please Dru?"
Angelus gave a smirk that Spike desperately wanted to wipe off. "What can I say? I just love to
see our favorite girl smile."
Spike looked at Drusilla, wanting to see her reaction. And much to his chagrin, she was smiling,
her eyes fixed on her sire's face. What did she see in Angelus? he wondered. Spike marveled over it
briefly, then dismissed it, for come tonight, it wouldn't matter.
Just then, Spike became painfully aware that, during his musing, Angelus was taking the
opportunity to entice her into a kiss. It took the bleached blonde vampire everything he had not to start a
fight right now. Then, all at once, Drusilla let out a moan, stiffening in Angelus' grasp, as one of her
visions struck her. Both of her companions knew what was coming, and they both watched in silence, one
in expectation and one in fear.
"The Slayer," Drusilla said, holding herself. "She's seeking to destroy us... Someone... a ghost
from the past is advising her on how to break up our family."
Angelus leaned closer to Dru. "Who's ghost?" he asked gently.
However, Drusilla simply fell into a trance, swaying back and forth slightly. "I see dark forces at
work around her. Someone will fall at her hand tonight..."
Spike spoke up at this. "Who, pet?" he asked curiously.
Drusilla shook her head. "It is not set in stone," she replied. "The scales will tip either way...
But by the time the night is over, one of my boys will be lost..."
Spike calmed a little at this, glad that she couldn't see anything pertaining to him. But what did
she mean it could go either way? Could it be propable that he would die tonight instead of Angelus? The
thought scared him, and he began to wonder, for the first time, if it was wise to see this through...
To be continued still!
Comments? Send to AngelBuffy
Get me back to Angel of the Night!
Get me back to Spike's Corner!
Get me outta here period!